Is there a polite way to ask this?/FB invites to sales parties/new question #9

[MamaMootz]

Lots of people lately have been inviting me to sales parties. Party-lite, some kind of naughty toy party, cookware (I forget what it's called but it's something gourmet), spice packets, and lingerie. And these have been in the past week.

Anyway, aside from the fact that I hate these parties and never go to them, we are not in a great place as a family, economically so even if I wanted to go, I could not. And the sheer number of invites is really getting irritating.

Is there a polite way for me to tell these people to please leave me off their invite lists? Or should I just keep declining the invitations and say nothing?

p.s. the invites are coming from Facebook, so I moved it here.

[Nurvingiel]

You can say, "Thank you for thinking of me, but please don't invite me to any more sales parties."

If they say, "Oh this one isn't a sales party, though you will have the option to buy fabulous things. It's this Friday at 5:30."

Then you can say, "Oh, unfortunately that's family dinner night. But I hope it goes well for you!" You don't need to tell them that every night is family dinner night. 

[RegionMom]

Many of these hostestesses (sp?)  are asked to collect as many names as possible.  Often e-mail invitaitons are used.  I was with a friend last weekend who received an invitation via her phone for a party of some sort, and she did not even know the hostess.
She scrolled through the over 200 names in the inbox guest list to discover that it was a mailing list from a group she dabbled in. 
She chose to hit delete.  It was obviously not a "I know you enjoy (activity) and would like to have you over for fun and discovery of (activity/product.)  It was a "I want sales points so I am inviting everyone!!!"

If the person knows you, they might be extending an invitaion out of friendship so you would not feel left out, even if knowing you would not buy for whatever reason. 
If she is tossing out invites like confetti, then no need to bother.  She will keep doing it.  Just say no and hit delete or use the circular file. 

[Harlow]

I'd just start declining invite you receive.

That might make them get the hint, if not, than just keep declining.



Because thing and hint are totally two different words..

[Hanna]

Are these good friends inviting you?

[klm75]

I treasure my social time with friends, and prefer to socialize, not listen to sales pitches.  I found that I was being invited to sales parties frequently about a year ago.  I declined every invite, it took about 2 months, but I no longer am invited to sales parties.  I do still receive, and accept, invitations to social evenings.

[MamaMootz]

Hanna, not really good-good friends. Most of these folks are from the mom's group I joined last year.
I think they are just sending the invites to everyone who's a member, in some cases.

OK I've been declining and will continue to do so...

[BatCity]

I have a set of guidelines that work for me.  If the hostess has never invited me to anything other than a sales party, I automatically decline (politely).

If she's invited me to other things, I usually still decline, but if I do decide to go I don't buy anything.

At the same time, I occasionally let drop that I don't do sales parties.  Eventually it got around, so the only people who ever invite me are the ones from example #1, so I decline those anyway.

Very easy.  I figure, why waste time with people who only want you around if they can get something from you?

[Wittyone]

When I am invited to this parties my response is a polite, "Thank you for thinking of me but these sales parties really aren't my thing.  Please don't invite me again."  It is polite and it works.

[MamaMootz]

Hi, again. OP here.

I guess I'm thinking along the lines of these sales party invites being akin to spam. To me, the invites are like someone calling my house to tele-market me or sending me spam e-mails.  I don't know or have a personal rel@tionship with most of the people issuing the invites, and they are using the social Mom's group as their personal mailing list.

I know it's rude to tell someone no invitations, please for something like a social event. I don't see these parties as social events, but rather another way to try and sell me something I don't want, presuming on a casual acquaintance to do so.

Is it rude to tell people straight up or make a blanket statement that I don't do these parties, so please don't invite me.. period?
Or is it rude because I should not be dictating which invitations I receive, even though these are sales pitches dressed up as invites?

And to clarify: most of these invites are coming to me via Facebook, because our mom's group linked up our site to a FB interface.

What I really want to do is write a status update on my wall asking for no more sales party invites, but I am thinking that would be rude on my part.

[Sophia]

I don't see what is rude about a status update. Maybe not everyone will read it. 

[MamaMootz]

There's actually a FB group called "I hate sales parties" that I just joined. Perhaps that will post on my wall/status update thingy -not sure.

[Nurvingiel]

I guess I'm thinking along the lines of these sales party invites being akin to spam. To me, the invites are like someone calling my house to tele-market me or sending me spam e-mails.  I don't know or have a personal rel@tionship with most of the people issuing the invites, and they are using the social Mom's group as their personal mailing list.

If it walks like a duck...

I know it's rude to tell someone no invitations, please for something like a social event. I don't see these parties as social events, but rather another way to try and sell me something I don't want, presuming on a casual acquaintance to do so.

Is it rude to tell people straight up or make a blanket statement that I don't do these parties, so please don't invite me.. period?
Or is it rude because I should not be dictating which invitations I receive, even though these are sales pitches dressed up as invites?

You can absolutely say, "Please, no invitations to sales parties." Totally polite.

And to clarify: most of these invites are coming to me via Facebook, because our mom's group linked up our site to a FB interface.

What I really want to do is write a status update on my wall asking for no more sales party invites, but I am thinking that would be rude on my part.

Don't status this. This would be publically chastizing the sales party inviters, and not polite. Send the people inviting you to such parties a private message, requesting not to be invited anymore.

e.g.

Hi Sandy,

Recently you've sent me a couple invites to sales parties. I appreciate your thinking of me but I would not like to be invited anymore. Best of luck for your parties though!

So, wasn't last Friday's finger painting session the funnest? I think I'll put my kids in the bathtub and let them have at 'er. They won't get anything messy and they'll already be in the bath, haha.

Cheers,
MamaMootz

(the last paragraph is meant to be an example of a fun thing from the Mom's group that you would talk about which, by the way, kids love so try it if you haven't done so already )

[Hanna]

What about this modified version of Nurvingiels?

Hi Sandy,

Just wanted to let you know I can't really do sales parties.  These days we don't have the time or the $, and I don't feel comfortable attending and not buying something.  I appreciate your thinking of me but just wanted to let you know for the future. Best of luck for your parties though!

So, wasn't last Friday's finger painting session the funnest? I think I'll put my kids in the bathtub and let them have at 'er. They won't get anything messy and they'll already be in the bath, haha.

Cheers,
MamaMootz

I personally just ignore them, but they do bother me, particularly coming from acquaintances that have never invited me to a real social event.

[audrey1962]

What I really want to do is write a status update on my wall asking for no more sales party invites, but I am thinking that would be rude on my part.

And I doubt it would work.

It sounds like these people are encouraged to invite their address book or their FB friends list or what not. I highly doubt that they check each individual "friend's" page before sending the invites.