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Author Topic: "Hey you, I want to sit on you."  (Read 9643 times)

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"Hey you, I want to sit on you."
« on: March 08, 2010, 08:14:39 AM »
This happened recently, before last Christmas, when I was going home to visit my family. I go to high school outside my country, because the warmer climate is beneficial to my health (I have children's rheumatism), and I live in a sort of dorm (a converted hotel complex) along with other students at the same school. A lot of other students were travelling with the same plane, among them a two girls from the dorm (a year younger than me) and two boys from my class (whom I actually drove to the airport with). Because of a mix-up with the tickets, I ended up on the same row as the boys, the last row on the plane, and the seats were tight even for me, though I'm pretty petite. It got even worse when the people in front leaned their seats back, squeezing the three of us into our seats. We have five hours of this to look forward to.

Finding a position to sleep in is practically impossible, even with the window seat, but I somehow manage, dozing off. And then I'm promptly woken up by the two girls, K and V. Mind you, I know these two girls, but they are not in my class, and they're hardly my friends, which just goes to make they're later request that much more ridiculous.

"Oh, how cosy this is!" K says when she sees us. V agrees, and says she wishes they could sit back here too. At this point I'm tired and cranky, my back is hurting, and the boys and I are crammed together like a pack of sardines, so "cosy" is hardly the word I would use. Uncomfortable would be more proper, I think.

K and V keep talking about how they want to sit with us (however they would manage that, when there's barely room for us), when a flight attendant chases them off, because she's bringing out the trolley and they're blocking the aisle. I suspected they'd be back, so I decided to give up on my sleep and instead get out my book. True enough, not sooner than the trolley is gone, V and K return. By this point I'm deeply buried in my book, so I barely notice them. And then K calls my name, probably not the first time (I am hopeless to get in touch with when I read), and makes her demand.
"Hey you, put away your book, me and V want to sit on your laps." No may we or can we, no please, no nothing. She says this as if it's a perfectly reasonable demand, and as if I couldn't even consider denying it. My reply?
"No. I'm reading." And then I turn back to my book. Maybe not the most polite rebuttal, but I'm tired and achy and annoyed, and it could have been a lot worse.

I should perhaps have considered what the boys wanted, but frankly, we were on a plane, and on a plane you have to respect the other passengers, whether you know them or not. The funny thing is, not long after V and K gave up and left, foiled by my book, both boys turned to me and thanked me, relieved. Though it beats me why they couldn't have stood up to the girls themselves...

You know, if they had wanted to change seats, I would have been happy to do so - travelling alone like I do, I often end up doing it, often so that couples or families can sit together. But wanting to share my seat? Sit on my lap like an overgrown child? Why would I ever want to that? Even ignoring physical comfort, it can't possibly be safe to do aboard a plane...


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Re: "Hey you, I want to sit on you."
« Reply #1 on: March 08, 2010, 08:17:40 AM »
I think you were fine.  If the boys had wished to sit with the girls, someone could have asked you to change seats.  Our obligation to consider the wishes of others does not generally extend to creating personal discomfort.
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Re: "Hey you, I want to sit on you."
« Reply #2 on: March 08, 2010, 08:27:17 AM »
I don't think you were rude. They were being rude. "No." is a complete sentence and you used it as such.


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Re: "Hey you, I want to sit on you."
« Reply #3 on: March 08, 2010, 10:01:18 AM »
Wait, what?  I'm guessing these girls are between the ages of 14-18.  Definately, old enough to know that you don't do that sort of thing on a plane.  Airline seats are uncomfortable enough without another person sprawled across your lap.  You were not rude; they were.


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Re: "Hey you, I want to sit on you."
« Reply #4 on: March 08, 2010, 10:25:31 AM »
I am trying to imagine how that would even work on an airplane. It definitely would not be comfortable for anyone involved - up to and including the people behind whom you were sitting!
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Re: "Hey you, I want to sit on you."
« Reply #5 on: March 08, 2010, 05:06:03 PM »
Sheesh!  You were 100% within your rights to refuse.  Well done.
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Re: "Hey you, I want to sit on you."
« Reply #6 on: March 08, 2010, 05:13:52 PM »
Sheesh!  You were 100% within your rights to refuse.  Well done.

Yep. Good for you.
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Re: "Hey you, I want to sit on you."
« Reply #7 on: March 08, 2010, 05:22:16 PM »
do you think that the girls might find the boys "hot" and thought that they could get something going if they were sitting in their laps?
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Re: "Hey you, I want to sit on you."
« Reply #8 on: March 09, 2010, 05:52:43 AM »
I wouldn't be surprised if it was because of the boys - they certainly weren't there for my company, that's for sure. It's a really strange way to show interest, if that's the case, but K and V have always been a their behaviour. I can't help but wonder what they would have done if a complete stranger had been sitting in my place; hopefully they would've been a bit more polite. It still annoys me how they automatically assumed that I'd agree to their demand simply because we knew each other.

And even if I hadn't chased them away myself, the flight attendant probably would have done it. Both she and the passengers nearby were looking mightily annoyed by the time V and K finally left, since the girls were pretty loud. Thankfully their giggling didn't wake up the baby two rows ahead of me - I can only imagine how that would have gone.


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Re: "Hey you, I want to sit on you."
« Reply #9 on: March 09, 2010, 07:01:32 AM »
I had to read the heading a couple of times to make sure I read it right, then I read the post because I was so sure it was a typo and the heading was meant to read: "Hey you, I want to sit with you".

Who demands that they be allowed to sit on another person?

I can understand sitting on someone as a show of affection if they are close to you and they allow it, or accidentally falling into someone's lap on a bus ( :-[) or, like my sisters, used to end a scuffle over who was to wash the dishes (The person doing the sitting won. Yes it was funny to watch). But seriously.

I don't think you were rude, I think you were assertive and to the point. Kudos!
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