Oh, here's another one I just remembered:
I was in the fourth grade, and for some reason I had to bring some money to school with me for something I was doing after school - can't remember what, or how much money - but my mother told me to have my teacher hold onto the money for me during the day, which I did.
Later, I was telling my mother how my teacher had almost forgotten to give me the money at the end of the day - and so I asked her for it. She was at the opposite side of the room, so she told me I could get it from her desk myself.
I said, "She said, 'Oh, you can get it. It's right under my bladder.'"
My mother almost couldn't breathe for laughing so hard. She finally calmed down enough to ask me some questions and ascertain that what the teacher actually said was that it was under her blotter.