I have a friend (P) that is about to become a father and is very excited! We have known each other for 5 years and worked very closely for 2 of them. I offered to "host" the baby shower with the department staff. All hosting entails in this case is letting everyone know, taking care of refreshments and decorations, and being there during the whole event from setup to cleanup.
P has an assistant (H) who declared she was hosting. Fine with me, I stepped back. H sends out an email suggesting a date, doesn't get a response right away and has a PA meltdown. I reassure her and suggest she send something one month in advance, not 4. Plans are changing, then finally it is decided that the shower will occur at a restaurant after the meeting that day. H goes on vacation. I hear nothing until yesterday. I ask another friend to pick up balloons to bring, since as far as I know I am the only one bringing anything (decorated cupcakes).
H contacts me
H: What decorations are you bringing?
Me: I am not bringing any decorations. Friend is bringing balloons.
H: Oh, I thought you bought decorations.
Me: No, I am only taking care of the cupcakes.
H: Oh, sends
Me: Anyway, at the restaurant, it is only feasible to bring balloons and a cake. Maybe some candy party favors, if you want to (basically saying I am not spending any more than I already have).
H: (Changes subject) Did you buy a greeting card? For everyone to sign?
No, since we will all be there. I don't think it is necessary.
So apparently, now I am hosting. I made the reservations, arranged balloons to be brought and am making the cupcakes and bringing them.
Later, I found out H sent an extremely PA email to the senior staff in my department saying that since no one was interested in going in for a gift card, she wasn't going to get one. There was never any communication concerning chipping in for a gift card prior to that email.
I can't wait for my vacation!