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Author Topic: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?  (Read 5499455 times)

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Piratelvr1121

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13650 on: November 13, 2013, 07:15:23 AM »
I'm about to hide the feed of someone I used to work with, mainly because lately many of her posts turn into drama between herself and her mother. Her grandmother raised her so she's "mom" to this woman and as far as I can tell, her relationship with her bio mother is touchy due to her mother being more immature than she is.

It's awkward reading some of it, and uncomfortable, like when you witness a discussion that really ought to have remained private.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

siamesecat2965

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13651 on: November 13, 2013, 07:35:15 AM »
Wardrobe malfunctions, esp when they're of my own doing. I picked out a cute outfit to wear today, something I won't roast in since I also have to work tonight. I work in a women's clothing store, so looking professional, put together etc. is essential. I also have a HUGE fashion pet peeve about black and navy together. I know you CAN do it, but I don't like it.

So my outfit was supposed to consiste of a cute black and white print top, longer, so worn with a chain belt, black pants, and a red cardigan. Black patent loafers completed the emsemble. So what do I see when I'm at work, in bright light? i wore NAVY pants with my black and white and red. ARRRGH. and no time to go home and change. Oh well. all i can do is suck it up and makefun of myself tonight. here its not so bad since i sit in my cube all day. But it annoys me, esp since i have black pants similar to the navy ones i wore, but they fit me a tad looser. i should have known by the fit. But no, I didnt.

Piratelvr1121

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13652 on: November 13, 2013, 07:56:26 AM »
When people seem to think that grandparents are entitled to see their grandchildren, regardless of poor or even toxic behavior.  For example, MIL knows what my parents are like and frankly really doesn't care for them at all. But when I told her that my brother had given my older sons his # with the message that my parents missed the boys, MIL said "Well they probably do, are you sure the boys aren't just telling you that they don't miss them? How would you feel if the boys cut you off from any grandchildren?"

It occurred to me once she went home that it's probably because she was already stressed on other matters, but it just seemed odd because other times she's said that family isn't always who you're related to by blood, but who you choose to have in your life, and that I did remind her of, and hopefully she'll take that as my way of saying "We're cool, you need not worry about being cut off!" Also when she said something about kids having two sets of grandparents, I said "Well they have you and FIL, plus there are plenty of people at church who tend to fill that role and there's also my best friend who tends to be grandmotherly towards them, too."

But in the moment it kind of annoyed me. MIL never even liked these people, agrees they're not good people, but she's trying to defend their rights as grandparents?
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

BabyMama

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13653 on: November 13, 2013, 08:09:40 AM »
I stopped at the local brewery last night to pick up a Christmas gift for DH, and had a pint while I was there. I ran into a casual friend and chatted with her a bit. At one point, she mentioned that she thought it was great that my husband let me have so much "me" time (sometimes I'll see a movie if it starts right after work, or, like last night, spend an hour or so doing something by myself. It's not usually stuff that takes a huge amount of time, or inconveniences DH much.) This isn't the first time I've had someone comment to me on "me" time--among others, my mother commented a couple months ago that it was nice that my DH "let me out of the house" to do stuff by myself.

I sort of get what they're saying...but the way they phrase it just gets on my nerves. He gets to do stuff on his own, too...

siamesecat2965

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13654 on: November 13, 2013, 08:58:28 AM »
I stopped at the local brewery last night to pick up a Christmas gift for DH, and had a pint while I was there. I ran into a casual friend and chatted with her a bit. At one point, she mentioned that she thought it was great that my husband let me have so much "me" time (sometimes I'll see a movie if it starts right after work, or, like last night, spend an hour or so doing something by myself. It's not usually stuff that takes a huge amount of time, or inconveniences DH much.) This isn't the first time I've had someone comment to me on "me" time--among others, my mother commented a couple months ago that it was nice that my DH "let me out of the house" to do stuff by myself.

I sort of get what they're saying...but the way they phrase it just gets on my nerves. He gets to do stuff on his own, too...

I think that would annoy me too, and I'm single! It sort of implies that a DH (i'm saying generally, not just yours) has the wife on a short leash, and that you need his permission to go/do anything. I have to say out of my friends who are the most happily married/together, its the ones who do their own thing on a regular basis!

Along those lines, every now and then I've heard people say, not necessarily friends, but maybe co-workers, aquaintances, etc.  something along the lines of (if going out to dinner say  for work or some such thing). "oh i have to make sure I leave something for my DH for his dinner" While I know with some couples the wife cooks, and the DH doesn't, it always strikes me as odd, since when my mom woudl go out with friends, my dad loved it since he could have something nasty mom didn't liike or didn't approve of!!!  I always want to say, but don't "is he not capable of putting together a meal for himself at all???"

Piratelvr1121

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13655 on: November 13, 2013, 09:09:50 AM »
I stopped at the local brewery last night to pick up a Christmas gift for DH, and had a pint while I was there. I ran into a casual friend and chatted with her a bit. At one point, she mentioned that she thought it was great that my husband let me have so much "me" time (sometimes I'll see a movie if it starts right after work, or, like last night, spend an hour or so doing something by myself. It's not usually stuff that takes a huge amount of time, or inconveniences DH much.) This isn't the first time I've had someone comment to me on "me" time--among others, my mother commented a couple months ago that it was nice that my DH "let me out of the house" to do stuff by myself.

I sort of get what they're saying...but the way they phrase it just gets on my nerves. He gets to do stuff on his own, too...

I get that too. On more than one occasion I've taken a trip to see a good friend and as my two closest friends live in different regions of the country from myself, it requires being away from home for at least a few days to get a decent visit with them.  (One's in California, the other in Iowa).

People have said "Your husband lets you do that?" Well, yeah.  Typically I say lightly "Well yeah, he knows the best way to have a sane and happy wife and mother of his children is to make sure she gets time to herself!"  Especially when said wife and mother needs some girl time and has very little of it at home.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

cabbagegirl28

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13656 on: November 13, 2013, 09:19:48 AM »
Heck, I wouldn't appreciate comments like that if someone asked, "Do your parents let you..." I mean, I am a grown woman attending grad school. I don't have any kind of history of being irresponsible, so my parents trust me.

It used to drive me up the wall when kids would be like, "You should sneak out of the house and come party with us" in high school. One, I knew they were lying to me about the parties, because I wasn't popular at all. Two, my house creaks so much that my parents would know if I went to the bathroom vs. going downstairs. violinp and I got the last laugh on that one though, because those kids are still on a short leash, and our parents are a lot more free with us now.




Vita brevis, ars longa

mmswm

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13657 on: November 13, 2013, 09:34:39 AM »
I've had this issue from a slightly different perspective.  As I've mentioned before, I moved back in with my parents after a massive medical/financial crisis.  I'm mostly back on my feet, but not quite financially secure enough to move back out.  Now, in moving back in with my parents, I also moved closer to most of my friends, which means I have the potential for a social life.  Every so often I go hang out with my friends. Because of my finances, I tend to be the one drinking water, since that's free, unless somebody buys me food/drinks.  That does happen.  Since I'm not a heavy drinker, my friends will often treat me to one or two drinks.  Also, my kids are old enough for me to leave them in the care of my oldest, and I rarely leave before the little ones go to bed, so I'm not imposing on my parents for child care. I have also occasionally taken off for the weekend.  Again, my friends know my finances and have split the cost of gas with me, and I left my kids with a friend so my parents wouldn't have to care for them.

Anyway, my parents are trying to "forbid" me to go out. Uh-huh.  I'm a 38 year old woman and I make sure that they don't have to worry about child care.  I'm not spending money I don't have.  I spend my days doing productive stuff. I'm not partying till all hours of the night and sleeping until noon (7 is the latest I get up). While I don't pay rent, I *do* do all the housework and cooking.  This is a huge house, and it's a lot of work, but it's fair, considering.  The worst I've ever done in failing to do housework is not realize that the kids' bathroom was out of clean towels because I only go in there a couple times a week to clean it, and I didn't realize they'd used so many of the bathroom towels for the pool. 

I'm not sure what they're expecting me to do.  It's driving me batty.
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

CrochetFanatic

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13658 on: November 13, 2013, 12:19:19 PM »
It seems like every time I'm in the car and I really have to go to the bathroom, I get stuck behind someone doing 5 or 10 UNDER the speed limit.  Sometimes it's just for a little bit, sometimes it's for the rest of the drive to wherever it is I'm going.  If the speed limit is 40, why would you go 30?  Whyyyy?  :(

exitzero

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13659 on: November 13, 2013, 12:56:32 PM »
It seems like every time I'm in the car and I really have to go to the bathroom, I get stuck behind someone doing 5 or 10 UNDER the speed limit.  Sometimes it's just for a little bit, sometimes it's for the rest of the drive to wherever it is I'm going.  If the speed limit is 40, why would you go 30?  Whyyyy?  :(

For the same reason that more I have to pee, the less able my boyfriend is to make a quick decision.
Last night he picked me up from the train station and just COULDN'T decide if he was going to come with me or take the train downtown.

I finally got in the car and told him the car and I were leaving in 10 seconds, with or without him in it. He came along.

Adelaide

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13660 on: November 13, 2013, 01:58:58 PM »
One of my work acquaintances is a serial apologizer and nothing anyone says helps. For instance, she'll show up 30 minutes late to a meeting (of which her absence is glaringly obvious, as there tend to be 4-5 members at these to begin with) and say "CRUD MONKEYS! I am SO sorry, I totally forgot" and then go on and on and ON about how she is "such a spazz" and how it'll "never happen again" and such. I hate that sort of behavior. No one thinks it's cute or feels sorry for you, we're all adults.

siamesecat2965

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13661 on: November 13, 2013, 02:19:28 PM »
One of my work acquaintances is a serial apologizer and nothing anyone says helps. For instance, she'll show up 30 minutes late to a meeting (of which her absence is glaringly obvious, as there tend to be 4-5 members at these to begin with) and say "CRUD MONKEYS! I am SO sorry, I totally forgot" and then go on and on and ON about how she is "such a spazz" and how it'll "never happen again" and such. I hate that sort of behavior. No one thinks it's cute or feels sorry for you, we're all adults.

I work with some of those too. All that's needed is a quick apology, and then MOVE ON. We are all adults, and if you mess up, so be it. We all do, but no need to beat a dead horse (as my dad used to say)

Dr. F.

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13662 on: November 13, 2013, 02:37:50 PM »
One of my work acquaintances is a serial apologizer and nothing anyone says helps. For instance, she'll show up 30 minutes late to a meeting (of which her absence is glaringly obvious, as there tend to be 4-5 members at these to begin with) and say "CRUD MONKEYS! I am SO sorry, I totally forgot" and then go on and on and ON about how she is "such a spazz" and how it'll "never happen again" and such. I hate that sort of behavior. No one thinks it's cute or feels sorry for you, we're all adults.

If not for the pronoun, I'd've thought you were working with a former coworker of mine. It used to drive me INSANE. He would pop his head into my office and start any question with, "I'm soooo sorry to bother you! I know how much you hate being distracted when you're trying to focus....etc. etc. etc." for about 5 minutes before asking me a simple yes/no question that could have been asked and answered in under a minute. He was also a champion of the, "Oh, I suck! I'm a horrible person! etc." and then just stare at you, grinning nervously, until you say, "Oh, no, CW, you're a great guy!"  ARGGGHHHH

Hillia

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13663 on: November 13, 2013, 02:53:30 PM »
One of my work acquaintances is a serial apologizer and nothing anyone says helps. For instance, she'll show up 30 minutes late to a meeting (of which her absence is glaringly obvious, as there tend to be 4-5 members at these to begin with) and say "CRUD MONKEYS! I am SO sorry, I totally forgot" and then go on and on and ON about how she is "such a spazz" and how it'll "never happen again" and such. I hate that sort of behavior. No one thinks it's cute or feels sorry for you, we're all adults.

If not for the pronoun, I'd've thought you were working with a former coworker of mine. It used to drive me INSANE. He would pop his head into my office and start any question with, "I'm soooo sorry to bother you! I know how much you hate being distracted when you're trying to focus....etc. etc. etc." for about 5 minutes before asking me a simple yes/no question that could have been asked and answered in under a minute. He was also a champion of the, "Oh, I suck! I'm a horrible person! etc." and then just stare at you, grinning nervously, until you say, "Oh, no, CW, you're a great guy!"  ARGGGHHHH

My DH, bless his heart, is awful about this.  He'll watch me run around the house for an hour, doing whatever chores I have on for the day, and when I'm just about done will say wistfully, "I'm such a lazy bum".  Well, actually, you certainly are behaving like one right now.  But he's really angling for me to say, "Oh no, honey, you work so hard all week, you just sit there and rest while I handle everything.  Really, I don't mind, I enjoy it".  It's bad enough that you're leaving all this to me, don't expect me to make it all right and alleviate your guilt also.

fountainof

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Re: What little things drive you completely up the wall....?
« Reply #13664 on: November 13, 2013, 02:58:07 PM »
I work with a woman who is also always late and people are annoyed by it.  She even brought up it at a meeting how it is funny that she is always late because only works 2 minutes from the office but I guess since management kind of ignores it, it isn't my problem.  But it does annoy me she thinks it is a cute quirk about herself.  For the record she never stays late though, 4:30 on the nose she is out of here.
« Last Edit: November 13, 2013, 02:59:45 PM by fountainof »