POD except since it is your MIL your DH needs to tell his parents this Plus they either cook before X or after Y the time between x and Y is the time you get home and cook.
I can't decide who I'm more annoyed with; FIL for being a total pain about meals or MIL for going along with it. Last night, I was trying to make stir fry while she was trying to thaw and fry him off a steak. We do not have a huge Viking stove, people...
I vote for both of them. Tell MIL that if she won't plan ahead due to FIL being a pain in the tuchus, she is to leave what you did plan alone and thaw her own after he makes up his mind. She doesn't get to short your meal due to his whims. Tell her that.
She knows it annoys me. And he won't decide what he wants to eat until he's ready to decide what he wants to eat. And when he wants to eat is right now, so waiting a few minutes for me to finish isn't acceptable to him. (He's in ill health and has had several minor strokes so he gets a lot of leniency for behavior, even though he's always been like this.) I'd wait to finish my meal (and have when I can) so we're not bumping into each other but oftentimes, I have already crossed the point of no return.
As for the food, one of the agreements of our living arrangements is they buy the food.* So me saying "paws off!" for something she bought seems wrong. I feel like my only option right now is to suck it up, buttercup. My DH is his dad's caregiver and under a lot of stress over his dad's health. I don't want to bug him over something so petty. I suppose the silver lining is that if I make more in anticipation of her needing it and it gets wasted, it's on her dime. I just hate doing that.
*DH and I pay the mortgage and most of the utilities, they pay for groceries, light and heat since they're home all day and need high temperatures to be comfortable in the winter and high AC to be comfortable in the summer.