DH and BIL went to the same trade school and graduated at the same time. Jobs in this field do exist but there aren't tons of them; many people who train in this field do so with the intent of opening their own shop. DH was able to get a job in a wonderful part of the country about 4 months after graduation; we moved and got settled in. BIL moved back in with their parents. About 4 months after DH and I moved, BIL called with a wonderful opportunity: he'd met a man who owned a small shop in a tiny, very very rural area in Oklahoma. He wanted to retire and was looking for someone to take over the business. He'd train them for a year, then retire. BIL thought DH would jump at the opportunity to move out there and be his 'partner' . DH did not. Because:
1. There was no provision for any actual salary or benefits during this training period. Not sure what BIL would be living on, but DH and I would be pretty much entirely dependent on whatever bits he was able to make in addition to my salary, assuming that I would be able to continue my work from home job.
2. The business was supporting one person in a reasonable style. How was it going to support 3?
3. Health insurance?
4. Part of BIL's great plan was that we'd all share a house to cut down expenses. Nope. No way was I going to be the primary financial support as well as the person cooking and cleaning for everyone.
5. The area where we had moved is beautiful, mountainous, wonderful climate. The particular part of OK that he wanted us to move to is flat, drought ridden, not particular scenic.
6. And the main reason - BIL has always treated DH like his personal servant. He's got a terrible personality, and they wouldn't be partners in a business so much as DH would be the workforce while BIL 'managed' him.
BIL whined for months about how he had missed his great opportunity because his family wouldn't support him.