Things that you just should NOT laugh at.

[Morticia]

^ I really can't imagine how that isn't a criminal offence.

[gramma dishes]

^ Unless of course, she can prove through dental xrays, etc. that his teeth were really quite rotten and needed to come out anway!   

[Moray]

^ Unless of course, she can prove through dental xrays, etc. that his teeth were really quite rotten and needed to come out anway!   

How nice of her, doing all that at no extra charge 

[vorbau]

If I had not seen pictures, I would not have believed this. But a couple of the field office guys showed me actual evidence photos while alternately laughing hysterically and crossing their legs.

WARNING: CONTAINS MINOR INJURY TO HUMAN SCRABBLE EQUIPMENT.

Apparently a gentleman currently living in base housing (which is why my agency got called) has been playing scrabble with one or more adults to whom he is not married. His spouse apparently learned of this - I understand a friend of hers sent her some phone pictures of him with a partner distinctly not his wife.

She may have read of this somewhere, because I recall seeing it on the Urban Legends website http://www.snopes.com/risque/revenge/superglue.asp, so maybe that's what gave her the idea. But she did it, only using Loctite (industrial-strength superglue). She glued his different bits of scrabble equipment to each other, then glued them down to their natural resting place, and then used the rest of the glue up by gluing his thighs together down to his knees.

Vorbau, Could you please explain how on earth this woman was able to manipulate this man's privates to the extent that she did and he did not wake up?  I mean, I'm not a guy, but I think I'd notice if someone was applying stuff to my nether regions...

Maybe he was drunk? My cousin put Nair all over her cheating Ex (head to, well you know) and he didn't wake up until it started burning. He was seriously drunk and probably stonned as well.

Disclaimer: I don't EVEN condone this. He was scum yes, but she sank to his level and violence isn't an answer.

I believe he was seriously drunk - I recall being told that his BAC was at or above .20 (nearly three times the legal limit in the US).

I also agree with Kimblee that answering violence and scrabble misbehavior with same is every bit as bad as answering rudeness with rudeness - which is why the wife is facing criminal charges.

My grandma used to say, when one of us swore to get revenge, "Time wounds all heels."  I much prefer her approach, because karma manages revenge far better than I ever could. (Yes, it's bad of me to laugh when people get a cosmic kick in the rear, but I keep it in the depths of my own mind.)

[Seraphia]

News article today on Yahoo made me think of this thread.  Short version: a dentist's boyfriend dumps her, then comes to her a few days later with a toothache.  Quote from the article: ""I tried to be professional and detach myself from my emotions," Anna Mackowiak, 34, told the Austrian Times. "But when I saw him lying there I just thought, 'What a bastard' and decided to take all his teeth out."  Which she did.  The very end of the article says she's being investigated for medical malpractice - no duh!

The comments on that story are priceless. I feel bad for the guy, but there's no way on earth I would ever put myself in a position to be unconscious around an ex, let alone let one do medical procedures on me three days after a breakup.

[Moray]

News article today on Yahoo made me think of this thread.  Short version: a dentist's boyfriend dumps her, then comes to her a few days later with a toothache.  Quote from the article: ""I tried to be professional and detach myself from my emotions," Anna Mackowiak, 34, told the Austrian Times. "But when I saw him lying there I just thought, 'What a bastard' and decided to take all his teeth out."  Which she did.  The very end of the article says she's being investigated for medical malpractice - no duh!

The comments on that story are priceless. I feel bad for the guy, but there's no way on earth I would ever put myself in a position to be unconscious around an ex, let alone let one do medical procedures on me three days after a breakup.

It's like kicking a fireant hill and deciding to lie down for a nap on the ruined pile of sand and anger. It's not to say what she did wasn't completely reprehensible, but seriously dude? Did you really think that was a wise decision on your part?

[Onyx_TKD]

News article today on Yahoo made me think of this thread.  Short version: a dentist's boyfriend dumps her, then comes to her a few days later with a toothache.  Quote from the article: ""I tried to be professional and detach myself from my emotions," Anna Mackowiak, 34, told the Austrian Times. "But when I saw him lying there I just thought, 'What a bastard' and decided to take all his teeth out."  Which she did.  The very end of the article says she's being investigated for medical malpractice - no duh!

The comments on that story are priceless. I feel bad for the guy, but there's no way on earth I would ever put myself in a position to be unconscious around an ex, let alone let one do medical procedures on me three days after a breakup.

It's like kicking a fireant hill and deciding to lie down for a nap on the ruined pile of sand and anger. It's not to say what she did wasn't completely reprehensible, but seriously dude? Did you really think that was a wise decision on your part?

Ok, now I need to find a way to use "ruined pile of sand and anger" in a conversation. Unfortunately, I'm not sure whether folks in my current area are familiar enough with fireants to have that mental picture...

[vorbau]

It's like kicking a fireant hill and deciding to lie down for a nap on the ruined pile of sand and anger.

After slathering yourself liberally with honey.

[Xandraea]

Assault is never funny, unless it involves a cameraman and a parrot.
http://youtu.be/9T1vfsHYiKY

ROFL a rare sighting indeed!  The cameraman's face lol .. and the narrator just watched.

[Black Delphinium]

Assault is never funny, unless it involves a cameraman and a parrot.
http://youtu.be/9T1vfsHYiKY

ROFL a rare sighting indeed!  The cameraman's face lol .. and the narrator just watched.

And he's so cute, too! That little green face...

[Kimblee]

Assault is never funny, unless it involves a cameraman and a parrot.
http://youtu.be/9T1vfsHYiKY

ROFL a rare sighting indeed!  The cameraman's face lol .. and the narrator just watched.

And he's so cute, too! That little green face...

He is pretty adorable. i love parrots. And I have no problem laughing at the poor camera man.

It makes me sad to watch since those birds are so helpless. I hope some group figures out how to help them, since its people messing with their home that made them so endangered.

[Sirius]

Chalk this one down to tiredness and a liberal dose of irony.

My sister and I are clearing out my recently-deceased aunt's home.  Sis was opening a pile of junk mail, and came across one of those Publisher's Clearinghouse envelopes that said, "Win $5K a week for life!" that was addressed to my aunt.  Sis remarked, "They got out of that one easy!" and we both laughed like loons.

[JoW]

Assault is never funny, unless it involves a cameraman and a parrot.
http://youtu.be/9T1vfsHYiKY

ROFL a rare sighting indeed!  The cameraman's face lol .. and the narrator just watched.

And he's so cute, too! That little green face...

He is pretty adorable. i love parrots. And I have no problem laughing at the poor camera man.

It makes me sad to watch since those birds are so helpless. I hope some group figures out how to help them, since its people messing with their home that made them so endangered.

I hope you folks realize, that was boy parrot who thought the photograper was a girl parrot.  The parrot was trying to play scrabble with the photographer. 
 

[Black Delphinium]

Assault is never funny, unless it involves a cameraman and a parrot.
http://youtu.be/9T1vfsHYiKY

ROFL a rare sighting indeed!  The cameraman's face lol .. and the narrator just watched.

And he's so cute, too! That little green face...

He is pretty adorable. i love parrots. And I have no problem laughing at the poor camera man.

It makes me sad to watch since those birds are so helpless. I hope some group figures out how to help them, since its people messing with their home that made them so endangered.

I hope you folks realize, that was boy parrot who thought the photograper was a girl parrot.  The parrot was trying to play scrabble with the photographer.

Oh, goodness yes. But he's so cute when he tries.

[Moray]

Assault is never funny, unless it involves a cameraman and a parrot.
http://youtu.be/9T1vfsHYiKY

ROFL a rare sighting indeed!  The cameraman's face lol .. and the narrator just watched.

And he's so cute, too! That little green face...

He is pretty adorable. i love parrots. And I have no problem laughing at the poor camera man.

It makes me sad to watch since those birds are so helpless. I hope some group figures out how to help them, since its people messing with their home that made them so endangered.

I hope you folks realize, that was boy parrot who thought the photograper was a girl parrot.  The parrot was trying to play scrabble with the photographer.

Oh, goodness yes. But he's so cute when he tries.

It's oddly adorable. (and how many people can say they've been shagged by a rare parrot?  ) My grandparents had this male Cockatiel, "Pretty Baby" who fell deeply and inexorably in love with a handheld Yahtzee game. It was his girlfriend. He would coo to it, display courting behaviors, and have wild 'n' crazy bird lovin' with it...in the middle of the living room. We'd leave it in his cage and he'd drag the darn thing out within minutes. I guess he was an exhibitionist