A Civil World. Off-topic discussions on a variety of topics. > Humor Me!

Things that you just should NOT laugh at.

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Wendy Moira Angela Pan:
I have a story. My grandfather died last July, and there wasn't much money for a funeral, so the service was held in this hokey little funeral home. It really was gross. The carpet was bright red and matted with age, and there were water stains on the walls. Some of us grandchildren were off in this little room to the side. It's hard to explain, but we weren't sitting in the pews with the rest of the mourners. Right before the service started, my husband got up to use the bathroom. About a minute into the eulogy, he came back from the bathroom, slid into the seat next to me and hissed in my ear, "There's a cockroach on the toilet seat!"

Oh man. I lost it. I was absolutely silent, but I laughed like a loon. And when I finally got a grip on myself, my husband nudged me and jerked his head toward the bathroom. The cockroach had emerged, and it was scuttling towards us. I looked around and realized all my cousins were watching it too, and we were all trying not to laugh. As soon as the cockroach got close enough, my husband, without moving any other part of his body, sort of kicked his leg out and stomped on the roach. I'm laughing even now just thinking of it. It was an extremely surreal moment.

purplemuse:
I can't think of any examples right now, but my pastor has this knack for saying things in his sermons that aren't funny on their own, necessarily, but have some connection to an inside joke, or something funny I saw or heard recently.

So more than once, I've been sitting in church, trying desperately not to laugh because everyone would think I was either rude or insane.

clairesmom77:
Thing 1:
I teach at a high school.  There is another teacher who is very very strange.  And when he talks, it's hilarious.  And he has no clue about what's going on around him.  In addition, he can't remember any of the student's names, so when speaking to one another about his class, the students call each other whatever "name" he calls them in class.  Usually, it's a name totally unrelated to their real name. 

I have a female student who does this impression of him that is so dead on . . it's uncanny.  (Note:  I heard this impression outside of school.  I also socialize with her parents, and she was telling a story about him at a BBQ, so I had no authority to tell her to stop.)  I can no longer talk to the other teacher without holding back a laugh.

On Friday, I witnessed him display genuine shock and awe that a student had a cell phone in which one can store phone numbers for future use.  I.lost.it.  I had to leave the room.

Thing 2:
When I was in college, I had this required class about teaching special needs kids.  There was this woman who thought she knew everything.  She went on and on about everything and was supremely annoying. 

On the first day, we had to write about why we chose to become teachers.  When the professor asked if anyone would like to share, of course her hand shot up.  She told this really long story about why she wants to be a teacher, and in it revealed a childhood nickname that she hated.  By the end of the story, she was sobbing.  It was so melodramatic and not the time or place for such a show.

By the end of the semester, everyone had had it with her.  One day, she started telling another story.  The guy behind me muttered, "Shut up, *childhood nickname*."  Those of us who heard it laughed out loud for a few seconds before catching ourselves.  Cue snickers for the rest of the class until we could get in the hall and really let loose.  During the class, I kept replaying the hilariousness in my mind and could barely keep myself in check. 

Ygraine:

--- Quote from: Auntie Venom on May 23, 2010, 06:39:37 PM ---
--- Quote from: Juana la Loca on May 23, 2010, 04:46:07 PM ---Darn near everything, which is why I keep getting into trouble.  ;D

--- End quote ---

Seriously. I should be imprisoned in the Behavioral Sciences division of the FBI for eternal observation due to my horribly sick and twisted sense of humor. I mean, seriously. There is no subject too sacred, no joke too dark, no humor too sick. I get the giggles at funerals....and that's the mildest.

--- End quote ---

Scootch over - I'll be joining you. 

LadyClaire:

--- Quote from: Ygraine on May 24, 2010, 11:25:10 AM ---
--- Quote from: Auntie Venom on May 23, 2010, 06:39:37 PM ---
--- Quote from: Juana la Loca on May 23, 2010, 04:46:07 PM ---Darn near everything, which is why I keep getting into trouble.  ;D

--- End quote ---

Seriously. I should be imprisoned in the Behavioral Sciences division of the FBI for eternal observation due to my horribly sick and twisted sense of humor. I mean, seriously. There is no subject too sacred, no joke too dark, no humor too sick. I get the giggles at funerals....and that's the mildest.

--- End quote ---

Scootch over - I'll be joining you. 

--- End quote ---

I hope there's room for me in that prison.

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