Theatre Etiquette

[Aeris]

As a 'recovering actor' the one rule that lives above all others for me is:

No snarking while you're still in the house. (we used to say it in a way that wouldn't get past the filters)



Seriously, it's beyond rude to wail loudly about how terrible the actors were, how unrealistic the set looked, how the direction was childish and arrogant, etc, while you are still in the theatre. It's like analyzing negatively the quality of someone's cooking while you are still at their house after a dinner party. For the love of god, wait until you get outside.

About a year ago I saw the horrific travesty that was Peter Sellers Othello. An old friend was in the audience as well. When I ran into her as we were gathering up our things, she fixed me with a pointed stare and said 'we should really get a drink....and discuss. 

[irish1]

As a 'recovering actor' the one rule that lives above all others for me is:

No snarking while you're still in the house. (we used to say it in a way that wouldn't get past the filters)



Seriously, it's beyond rude to wail loudly about how terrible the actors were, how unrealistic the set looked, how the direction was childish and arrogant, etc, while you are still in the theatre. It's like analyzing negatively the quality of someone's cooking while you are still at their house after a dinner party. For the love of god, wait until you get outside.

About a year ago I saw the horrific travesty that was Peter Sellers Othello. An old friend was in the audience as well. When I ran into her as we were gathering up our things, she fixed me with a pointed stare and said 'we should really get a drink....and discuss. 

Love it!!

There's also polite ways to say you weren't impressed - how about 'wonderful isn't the word!'

[Sabbyfrog2]

Resurecting this thread as I just closed a show (and am about to open another one this weekend.. I am TIRED!) and witnessed some 'interesting' behaviour from the audience.

-Don't try to distract the actors just to see if you can make them break. That's just unbearibly stupid and rude. Also on that note...Yes, I know the stage is really really close to the audience. That's part of the intimacy. That is not an invitation to talk to the actors while they are on stage.

-Don't yell, "I can't See!" in the  middle of a 'blackout'. We know. The lights are out on purpose. They will come back on as soon as the scene change is over in about 5 seconds.

-Do NOT go up to an actor afterwards and congratulate them on thier amazing performance but then ask them why the director hired that other actress who played the other lead becuase "she was the worst thing I have EVER seen. How on earth did you do so well when you had to work with that?"* Even if it's true, don't do it! I mean COME ON!

-Laser pointers. Just....no...

*(This happened to me last weekend. The things people were saying about my costar was just mean. Granted, they were actually right in the fact that she was not the best actress but what the heck am *I* suppossed to do about it?!)

As a 'recovering actor' the one rule that lives above all others for me is:

No snarking while you're still in the house. (we used to say it in a way that wouldn't get past the filters)


Seriously, it's beyond rude to wail loudly about how terrible the actors were, how unrealistic the set looked, how the direction was childish and arrogant, etc, while you are still in the theatre. It's like analyzing negatively the quality of someone's cooking while you are still at their house after a dinner party. For the love of god, wait until you get outside.

About a year ago I saw the horrific travesty that was Peter Sellers Othello. An old friend was in the audience as well. When I ran into her as we were gathering up our things, she fixed me with a pointed stare and said 'we should really get a drink....and discuss. 

This is exactly how we handle it in our circle. 

I also have some etiquette for actors on that same vein:
-Don't ask people what they thought after of the show right in the middle of the lobby. If they didn't like it, and are the honest sort, you are exposing everyone else to that and it WILL have a negative effect on the cast as well as other patrons who did enjoy it. Actually, don't ask at all unless you are truly prepared for the truth and in that case only ask someone you trust to give you the honest truth. If you really want to know, ask them after everyone has left or in private if it's a friend as not to risk the other cast members or crew ovehearing that unsolicited critisicm.

[Marisol]

Sabbyfrog,

I agree with you 100%  I hate when people start discussing negative things about a show in the lobby where other patrons are mingling and where the cast might be too.

This isn't so bad with a professional show where it is unlikely that family and friends are in the audience and where the cast is highly unlikely to be out saying hello.  But if this is a community theatre, or even a local professional theatre, you are often surrounded by friends and family of the cast, crew members, and the cast themselves after the performance.  I think it is terribly rude to discuss things you didn't like until you've reached a more private area.

By the way, what show did you finish and what are you up to next?

[Xandraea]

Who knows if anyone's still looking at this thread, as it's been months since any new post, but I really had to comment on Reply #10.  I don't know how to quote here, but the gist of it is someone nearby at a theatre had let loose with a "silent but deadly", and the poster "solved" this issue by pulling out a strongly scented lavender towelette, for which those in neighboring seats were thanking her.  This brings to mind cautions by my choir directors and anyone else in charge of groups that must spend time in close proximity to one another: NO Perfumes, scented lotions, etc, as many people have allergies and cannot BREATHE around such things.  Lavender is a huge problem for me, as I have both allergies and asthma, and thus if someone nearby me had anything "strongly scented" with lavender, I would be wheezing, coughing, choking, and otherwise miserable, to the point of possibly having to get up and leave the theatre myself, further disturbing those nearby who are attempting to enjoy the performance.

Strongly scented ANYTHING (perfumes, lotions, towelettes), should be avoided for the comfort/safety of others.

[Fleur-de-Lis]

Who knows if anyone's still looking at this thread, as it's been months since any new post, but I really had to comment on Reply #10.  I don't know how to quote here, but the gist of it is someone nearby at a theatre had let loose with a "silent but deadly", and the poster "solved" this issue by pulling out a strongly scented lavender towelette, for which those in neighboring seats were thanking her.  This brings to mind cautions by my choir directors and anyone else in charge of groups that must spend time in close proximity to one another: NO Perfumes, scented lotions, etc, as many people have allergies and cannot BREATHE around such things.  Lavender is a huge problem for me, as I have both allergies and asthma, and thus if someone nearby me had anything "strongly scented" with lavender, I would be wheezing, coughing, choking, and otherwise miserable, to the point of possibly having to get up and leave the theatre myself, further disturbing those nearby who are attempting to enjoy the performance.

Strongly scented ANYTHING (perfumes, lotions, towelettes), should be avoided for the comfort/safety of others.

I have a scent vial - a plastic bead jar which *just* holds a cotton ball, moistened with two or three drops of lemon essential oil.  The scent is contained, but strong enough for me to smell it if I open the lid and keep the vial close.  But I have to have the vial under my nose for me to be able to smell it - even from a few inches in front of me, the scent is indistinct.

[Xandraea]

Fleur-de-Lis, your small vial of subtle lemon scent sounds wonderful! I love citrus/fruit scents (real fruit, like essential oils).  Also, if it is so subtle you have to hold it beside your nose to smell it, it sounds like something that wouldn't bother people around you. I also like almond, peppermint, rosemary, cinnamon, and coffee. I'd still avoid having anything more than a light scent or a vial that could be closed to contain the scent, like yours.

(LOL @ the director of the large choir I was a part of who'd remind us before each concert, "Please, do not wear perfumes, colognes, scented lotions and the like. Please DO wear unscented deodorant."    -- ~125 people crammed onto risers for an hour or two -and we tended to move/dance a bit - did get a bit warm) 

[Clair Seulement]

For the benefit of archive--intermission is for people to get up and use the restrooms etc. Please do not glare at/make snide comments about/refuse to move for people in your row who wish to get up for intermission. Thank you.

[BeagleMommy]

Last year my niece's high school class performed "Phantom of the Opera".  It was a major achievement as they were the first high school in the nation to perform it.  It was magnificently done.  However, the woman in the row ahead of us was a bit of a pill.  Apparently, she had never heard of the musical or even known that it was a book and a movie prior to a musical  .  She kept asking her husband to explain it to her.  During the performance.  Even he got exasperated with her and finally whispered "These kids are trying to put on a show.  I'll explain everything at intermission."

[cabbagegirl28]

Well, after seeing a theatre performance a week or so ago, I just have one tiny observation.

Even if the theatre is dark, that is not the time for any audience member to put on AXE or deodorant. Seriously. I can't believe a patron would do that.

[rm247]

I'm part of a local theatre group. and we refer to Bee Gee Moments.

So called because after one performance a cousin of the Gibb brothers (the band The Bee Gees) came over to one of the guys working the stage to complain that a clock on the mantlepiece had a clockface that wasn't facing the audience but she could see a reflection which showed that whilst the clock moved, it didn't show the jump in time from day to night between scenes.


Apparently, the clock was the most interesting thing on stage!

So now whenever someone tries to argue that mispronouncing a unusual name or some other little detail being incorrect won't get notice, we refer back to the Bee Gee moment.

[snowdragon]

If you can not handle the fact that the lights go out ....don't go. Seriously sitting there screaming "It's dark, It's dark, Turn the lights on." through the entire first act, ain't cool. If you have an issue that makes sitting in the dark an issue it's on you to deal with, not the whole house not to be able to hear the musical. ( I know this person, she's not special needs, just special snowflake.)

On the other hand - if one of the ushers is autistic, the house knows him, knows his issues and his capabilities...complaining that "people like that don't belong here" is cruel, unnecessary and likely to get a good many folks mad at you - I'd rather talk to Erik with all his issues than listen to you whine about how unfair you think his inclusion is.

[Miriam]

Another one to touch on with negative patrons: if you know a show is against your politics, ethical code, and everything else you believe in do not berate the actors.

A few years ago the seniors at my school had the once in a lifetime opportunity to perform something really abstract: a series of monologues each individual wrote yet were acted out by another person in their group. It was beautiful writing and acting really, but of course if you give young adults the stage some heavy stuff will come out. One mother attending the show was so offended one monologue was about a lesbian character discussing life over a coffee, she went backstage and  yelled at the actress about how far in hell she's going to go and all the torture from Satan she will receive. The other actress who wrote it stepped up and told the mother that was her piece, she can kindly disagree, but can also go to a place where the sun don't shine for even thinking it was okay to behave in such a manner to a total stranger. That mother was banned from most school activities her son (who did lighting) was involved in.

[Margo]

BeagleMommy, I think one of that lady's relatives was seated just behind us when we went to a performance at the 'Globe Theatre' in London a few years ago. He was a youngish man who felt it was appropriate to interpret for his foreign girlfriend throughout the play.

He was very indignant when he was asked, by various other patrons in varying degrees of politeness to keep quiet.

What I couldn't fathom was how anyone would think this was appropriate in *any* venue, whether it was live theatre, or a cinema, or anything else. And also-this wasn't a new play. It was Shakespeare. It's not as though it would be hard to find a summary of the plot ahead of time
to help someone understand.

[Shea]

Another one to touch on with negative patrons: if you know a show is against your politics, ethical code, and everything else you believe in do not berate the actors.

Likewise, do not come storming out of the theatre mid-performance and berate the house staff. They have even less control over artistic decisions than the actors do.

This happened several times when I was working at a theatre .