Author Topic: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)  (Read 8334 times)

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Mopsy428

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Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« on: July 20, 2010, 10:40:46 PM »
Last week, I learned that a guy that I went to elementary school with died. He was born the day before I was. We used to walk together after school. He was the sweetest little boy.

Anyway, he was in the hospital. Then he was released. And the next thing I know, I get an e-mail from a mutual friend, telling me that he died.  :(

Now, I'm not that old. I'm under 30. I told one of my uncles that a friend had died, and he said, "What was it? Coke? Heroine?" I said, "Why would you assume that he died of a drug overdose? He actually had a heart condition, and his heart just gave out."

Uncle then says that he was so young, he just assumed it was a drug overdose.  ::)

Minmom3

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #1 on: July 20, 2010, 11:09:53 PM »
Last week, I learned that a guy that I went to elementary school with died. He was born the day before I was. We used to walk together after school. He was the sweetest little boy.

Anyway, he was in the hospital. Then he was released. And the next thing I know, I get an e-mail from a mutual friend, telling me that he died.  :(

Now, I'm not that old. I'm under 30. I told one of my uncles that a friend had died, and he said, "What was it? Coke? Heroine?" I said, "Why would you assume that he died of a drug overdose? He actually had a heart condition, and his heart just gave out."

Uncle then says that he was so young, he just assumed it was a drug overdose.  ::)


Nice....  I knew a 16yo boy who died while out on his morning jog.  Fit kid, dad was a doctor, so the boy got the best of medical attention, and yet, was dead when he hit the dirt.  He had a heart defect that picked that day to manifest.  I don't think they knew to run tests to see if it was there, since his parents were hale and hearty, it was just a fluke thing for the boy.
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Darcy

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #2 on: July 20, 2010, 11:23:11 PM »
An 18yo classmate died in his sleep.  Most of our small class presumed drugs because we knew that he had done them.  But his blood was clean, and his heart had no defects last I heard.

blue2000

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #3 on: July 21, 2010, 07:01:37 AM »
That's an awful assumption!

I would have thought 'car accident' or something like that. Drug overdoses are big news, especially for celebs, but they aren't that common!
You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

Fliss

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #4 on: July 21, 2010, 07:06:18 AM »

When I was visiting my family about 10 years ago with the partner in crime, we saw an ambulance go rushing past the shopping center. My mother and sisters comments? 'Oh, must be another druggie dead.'

Of course, because people don't have things like heart-attacks, babies, falls, etc. Any ambulance rushing around Mt Druit MUST be going to a druggie.

It was things like this that is the reason I live on the other side of the country. And it's still not far enough.
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Ereine

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #5 on: July 21, 2010, 07:19:03 AM »
My first thought would have probably been suicide, as it's sadly not very rare here, but I would never say anything about it. Especially if I suspected that it was suicide (but I wouldn't comment any way).

mechtilde

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #6 on: July 21, 2010, 12:46:26 PM »
We had something similar when my SIL died- some people assumed it was a overdose- it was hypoglaecimia.

This attitude is sickening.
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Phoebe

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #7 on: July 25, 2010, 01:51:22 PM »
Just this year, my nephew and his roommate had a friend stay overnight.  The friend died in his sleep.  He'd had multiple serious health issues since birth.  I found out about it via a phone call while I was at work.  A coworker walked by as I was on the phone, overheard some of the conversation, and waited till I hung up to ask what was wrong.  I explained and mentioned that he'd just turned 21 the week before.  Before I could say that it wasn't totally unexpected, she interrupted me and said, "oh, well then it was probably drugs.  Or alcohol.  Or both." in a very dismissive tone. 

Yeah.  She's an EMT and supposedly keeps an open mind and never assumes anything about a patient (we hear this often from her).

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #8 on: August 12, 2010, 01:50:14 PM »
A boy in our high school died. And rumors about him being a druggie flew.

He got shot in a robbery in a convience store because the criminal was dragging a girl with him as a hostage, and our classmate refused to move from the door and let the guy out. Even shot he stayed on his feet. But even after this came out people still would tell each other it was drugs, because the boy had been a weed smoker.
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Wonderflonium

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #9 on: September 06, 2010, 12:20:15 AM »
I guess because of my job, I assumed it was a congenital condition (and turns out I was right!). People are just awful sometimes! I don't know why they get such a rush out of being mean.
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Clara Bow

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #10 on: September 06, 2010, 04:58:43 PM »
Good grief. Has your uncle never heard of cancer?
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Suze

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #11 on: September 06, 2010, 05:03:45 PM »
A boy in our high school died. And rumors about him being a druggie flew.

He got shot in a robbery in a convience store because the criminal was dragging a girl with him as a hostage, and our classmate refused to move from the door and let the guy out. Even shot he stayed on his feet. But even after this came out people still would tell each other it was drugs, because the boy had been a weed smoker.

wow - he should have been "a hero" and instead he got victimized

how sad
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DaisyLeigh

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #12 on: September 11, 2010, 09:38:30 AM »
One of my husband's sisters died a week and a half ago. She was 48 and died from cancer. If anyone ever said that it was drugs, I would likely forget my manners.

I try my best to never assume. I have known people of all ages who have died from all sorts of health issues that have nothing to do with illegal drug usage.

Lisbeth

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #13 on: September 11, 2010, 09:45:05 AM »
That's really obnoxious-it overlooks someone's grief as well as dismisses the person's actual life by just assuming they died of a drug overdose.
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JacklynHyde

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Re: Because of his age, it must have been...(Death)
« Reply #14 on: September 11, 2010, 10:56:07 AM »
M, one of my dearest friends in the world died suddenly right before his 25th birthday.  He was brilliant but troubled, had been off and on drugs for the longest time, but had been sober for six months before his death.  His family made sure EVERYONE knew that he had a fatal seizure and his death was from natural causes.  This was even mention at M's memorial service (which had attendance like I've only seen during the major religious holidays at that institution).  Months later, M's brother quietly admitted to me that M had decided to try one last bag of heroin as an early birthday gift to himself, and that triggered the seizure.  M had been doing so well for so long that his family was in complete denial even after identifying his body.  They couldn't bear for the last memory of their son to be this one terrible lapse in judgement.

It's been over a decade and my heart is still broken.