BG/ I volunteered to coach netball at my children's school, after the teacher asked me to become involved. I have never played netball, therefore I put a *lot* of time and effort into educating and training myself to be a proficient coach. I am not a teacher, I do not get paid for the coaching, but I enjoy it *tremendously*.
I moved to this country just over a year ago, and often feel that I don't fit in, because "we" (homecountry) do things a little different than it's done here. It's been small gripes, though, like co-workers not reciprocating greetings. I also often feel that the local people are rude and abrupt, but I know they aren't, they just communicate differently to what I am used to.
The coaching is one afternoon a week and parents have to be present as we have no indoor facilities, and a high probability of rain every day :-) Not all parents are present though - but that's another story for another day. End BG/
I have a kidney infection and have to take two strong antibiotics. The netball coaching went very well today, until it started raining. We herded the girls under a small canopy to get out of the rain, and decided that we would call it a day, as it didn't look like it was going to clear up.
There were 18 girls at practice, and three adult women standing around, in addition to myself and another parent who also volunteers as a coach. I didn't want to get wet (and cold) as my back is sore, and I also didn't want the children to get wet. I know rain can't make you sick, but the children aren't allowed outside when it rains during school hours, and I wasn't about to let them run in the rain contrary to school rules.
There was one little girl who kept on running onto the court, dancing in the rain. As soon as her friends spotted her, they followed suit. I retrieved them twice, telling them that we all have to wait under the roof so we don't get wet. The girl (Jessica) told me that she is allowed to play in the rain, to which I answered "no, I am saying you are *not* allowed. All of us will wait under the roof for the parents to get here."
Not 20 seconds later, Jessica was in the rain again, calling out to another girl to join her. I retrieved them both, saying "you have to stay under the roof like I told you to". Jessica refused to take shelter (it was raining HARD) so I said "Jessica, I will have to tell Mrs Principal that you are being insubordinate if you don't come here now."
The other coach and the parents chuckled and didn't look at all upset with my behaviour. Please note that I never raised my voice or use a mean tone.
Jessica burst into tears (a bit of an overreaction, imo) and ran to an adult. Who turned out to be her mother. Who then proceeded to YELL at me that I have to talk to *her* if I have a problem and not "threaten" her child. He screeched on and on and on about how scared Jessica was of me, and that I have no right to "threaten" her child after she said her baby can play in the rain.
This upset me so much that I was shaking (I go into hide mode when people yell) so I walked away. I couldn't go far, the roof is small - about 3 x 3 meters. She followed me to my bag, where I was crouched to get some tissues, stood over me and YELLED that I have to stop making a scene, and that I have no right to "threaten" her child as I am the child's teacher.
At this point I was so upset that I could.not.speak. I just wanted to hide, but I couldn't leave, as there were 10 girls waiting for their parents to collect them. My DS (who is 8 years old) came to stand next to me, and this woman pushed him away
Not violently, but as if to say that he should stay out of it. I couldn't even react to that.
She stopped screeching after
two million years
a minute or two, turned on her heel, and walked off.
No for the question:
I am not prepared to coach this little girl any longer. I did not threaten her, I did not raise my voice, I am an excellent volunteer coach. And I will not be falsely accused by a raving lunatic of things I simply did.not.do. I can't help to think what her next accusation will be!
How do I politely tell her that I won't be possible for me to act as couch for her child any longer?
And I still wonder how grown women can watch a verbal assault and do or say *nothing* to stop it, but I have seen that it's the way things are done here. If it doesn't affect you directly, you pretend you don't see it.