Author Topic: DD gets to use this phrase  (Read 4798 times)

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Alida

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DD gets to use this phrase
« on: August 03, 2010, 07:53:29 PM »
My 17 year old is bi-s*xual. I support her choices and, more importantly, I love her. What surprises me, though, is the reaction some of her friends' parents have had, people who have known her since she was 4 years old.

Her hair is short. She is growing it out, but it's cute. I've had short hair since I was 12, so I never thought twice about it. Apparently, though, this, combined with the fact she has a girlfriend, has a couple parents sure that DD is going to try to "turn" their daughters, even those with boyfriends! They've been pretty open with this opinion, too. I told DD "What an interesting assumption" may be her best route to go. And that she should be pretty proud that she's considered so darned influential ;)


blue2000

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #1 on: August 03, 2010, 08:32:35 PM »
Gee, an accidental 'hello' from one of those people is going to cause their little precious to go bananas? They don't think much of their kids, do they? Or yours. :-\

I'd say "what an interesting assumption" is about the most polite way to put it.
You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

Hanna

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #2 on: August 03, 2010, 09:39:01 PM »
That will work well in some situations.  In others, she might want to say:
"Do you really think gender preference so easily influenced?"

Maybe it will make them think about things and learn something.

I know openly living any life other than straight isn't an easy path , but I have seen changes in the last few years that are amazing.  And your DD is fortunate to have you!  Hugs to both of you. 

WolfWay

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #3 on: August 05, 2010, 07:01:27 AM »
Gee, an accidental 'hello' from one of those people is going to cause their little precious to go bananas?
Ah, but sometimes a hello isn't just a hello! As one of my g*a*y friends put it (after almost getting into a fight with some aggresive drunken homophobe while standing in line to get a drink), "Yes, of course I was flirting with you when I accidentally trod heavily on your foot."  ::)
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Ferrets

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #4 on: August 05, 2010, 08:44:50 AM »
Apparently, though, this, combined with the fact she has a girlfriend, has a couple parents sure that DD is going to try to "turn" their daughters, even those with boyfriends!

Didn't you know? One's primary duty as a bi person is to recruit an army of Bi Minions for the cause. It's on the mission list we get with the membership card and everything. ;D

In your shoes, I'd be tempted to make the odd sarcastic comment about being "so concerned" that these hetero girls would "turn DD straight", but that's not E-Hell approved, and also something that could backfire far too easily. :P

Hugs to both of you. :)

PeasNCues

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #5 on: August 05, 2010, 09:15:11 AM »
I didn't know bi was catching.

Good for you for giving her the tools to deal with this type of ignorance in the most polite way possible.
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Namárië

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #6 on: August 05, 2010, 09:39:01 AM »
Hugs for both you and your DD! It must be so frustrating to deal with the desire to explain just how ridiculous they are being, knowing that it probably won't make a difference. WAIA is a great response.

Just a warning, she also might want to prepare herself for invasive questions and comments about her scrabble life. Especially (in my experience) from young men. :-\
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Jolie_kitten

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #7 on: August 05, 2010, 09:45:46 AM »
Oh yeah, I know the type of attitude... Some people seem to genuinely believe that sexual preferences are catching like the flu :D
A friend of mine has once been accused by an overly concerned and not entirely sane person that she'd turn her daughter into a lesbian; my friend was 100% straight- but an activist for gay people's rights.
Very smart and sensible people we share the space with.............
Where there is cake there is hope. And there is always cake ;)

blue2000

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #8 on: August 05, 2010, 10:31:44 AM »
Oh yeah, I know the type of attitude... Some people seem to genuinely believe that sexual preferences are catching like the flu :D
A friend of mine has once been accused by an overly concerned and not entirely sane person that she'd turn her daughter into a ********; my friend was 100% straight- but an activist for g*a*y people's rights.
Very smart and sensible people we share the space with.............

So you don't even have to be around a gay person? Just brush against someone who knows someone who is gay? Did Not-Entirely-Sane-Person realize that if that theory were true, we would all be gay - including her? Or is that too logical? :P
You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

AngelicGamer

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #9 on: August 05, 2010, 11:05:28 AM »
Apparently, though, this, combined with the fact she has a girlfriend, has a couple parents sure that DD is going to try to "turn" their daughters, even those with boyfriends!

Didn't you know? One's primary duty as a bi person is to recruit an army of Bi Minions for the cause. It's on the mission list we get with the membership card and everything. ;D

Shushhh - you're giving away the secrets!    ;) ;D

Alida, could your DD get her friends to help stand up for her with their parents?  As in a shocked silence or other more etiquette approved way of stunning them?

I really don't have any other advice but (((hugs))) to you and your daughter.  Also Kudos to you for being so understanding - not a lot of parents are.




"Life's tough, huh?  And then you die." ~ Buck, the Magnificent Seven.

Phoebe

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #10 on: August 06, 2010, 06:07:20 PM »

Maybe it will make them think about things and learn something.

 

Just because they have a different opinion doesn't mean they're automatically wrong.  They may be thinking the same thing. 

Amava

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #11 on: August 06, 2010, 06:13:59 PM »

Maybe it will make them think about things and learn something.

 

Just because they have a different opinion doesn't mean they're automatically wrong.  They may be thinking the same thing. 
There is a difference between opinions and facts.

Phoebe

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #12 on: August 06, 2010, 06:18:55 PM »

Maybe it will make them think about things and learn something.

 

Just because they have a different opinion doesn't mean they're automatically wrong.  They may be thinking the same thing. 
There is a difference between opinions and facts.

Exactly.  And when someone needs to "learns something," it's generally assumed to be a fact that "needs" to be learned.  These are just opinions being discussed, not facts.  And I'm *not* saying sexual orientation is "contagious."

Amava

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #13 on: August 06, 2010, 06:24:30 PM »
I'm sorry Phoebe, I think I'm misunderstanding you, then. Never mind! :)

Phoebe

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Re: DD gets to use this phrase
« Reply #14 on: August 06, 2010, 06:26:07 PM »
I'm sorry Phoebe, I think I'm misunderstanding you, then. Never mind! :)
No worries  ;)  and certainly no reason to apologize  :)