General Etiquette > Techno-quette

Finding out via FB?!

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I'm not sure if this really goes here or under Family & Children. Mods, please move if needed.

I really would like some input from unbiased, etiquette savvy people. I am so furious right now, I can barely see straight.

b/g: my sister has been married to her husband (BIL) for almost 11 years. They have had their ups and downs and have been to counseling for quite some time. All of our family and close friends are aware of their problems. end b/g.

So, the past week or so has been REALLY bad. BIL has decided today to end it. Okay, fine. It happens and truthfully, I think they will both be better off, as will their two children. I did not find out this info from my sister though, I found out when I logged onto FB and saw the status update by my BIL on his page. You know the ones that everyone can see on their news feed? And he has continued to post updates, that although to some, might be vague, anyone who really knows them, knows exactly what it means. The latest is a link to a music video of the song that was their first dance at their wedding and he left a comment about how it used to mean something, but not anymore.

I have not commented on a single post, because I'm not sure I should say ANYTHING and also because I'm so angry, I want to make sure that anything I do say (if I do) isn't rude. Should I leave a comment suggesting (politely of course) that FB is not the appropriate place to be airing this kind of info? Should I send a private message? Or should I ignore,ignore,ignore. If I should say something, I am looking for suggestions because I don't quite trust myself right now.

I would let it go.  You can't control what your BIL or future ex-BIL posts on his FB page.  I would call your sister though and give her a shoulder to cry on/person to vent to.

Sheila Take a Bow:
Don't say anything -- he's looking for drama, don't reward him.  Ignore him as if he were a toddler throwing a tantrum.

Defriend him.  If you're not ready to do that, hide his newsfeed.

Sorry he's being horrible.

I would ignore this. Your BIL is either doing this because he needs his friends to support him or because he finds it cathartic. Don't take it as a personal insult to either your sister or yourself.

He sounds like my cousin's ex.  He's a dramallama.  Don't engage.  It's not worth it.


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