Author Topic: Naked children in the yard  (Read 11813 times)

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PeterM

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #15 on: August 05, 2010, 12:24:56 PM »
But I see no reason she can't say to the parents: "Your child is making me uncomfortable when he acts like that, plus he is upsetting the dog".

I'd change the order and put the dog first, with "also, him running around nekkid all the time makes me uncomfortable." I don't know if it'd actually make any difference, but something concrete like "harassing the dog and making it bark loudly" sounds like a safer opener to me.

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #16 on: August 05, 2010, 12:26:37 PM »
Harlow - I guess the other part of my suggestion is that I can't think of another route that would get the behavior to stop.  If OP is uncomfortable with it and the parents aren't, no one but the authorities can put a stop to it.  And they should, because who knows who else is seeing the child.

Harlow

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #17 on: August 05, 2010, 12:29:37 PM »
Harlow - I guess the other part of my suggestion is that I can't think of another route that would get the behavior to stop.  If OP is uncomfortable with it and the parents aren't, no one but the authorities can put a stop to it.  And they should, because who knows who else is seeing the child.

The OP hasn't done anything to stop it as of yet. OP hasn't talked to the parents, it's why she's posted, looking for advice. The parents are probably clueless and doesn't know how their behavior is affecting outsiders. People have different ideas on whats acceptable. That's okay, because the parents might apperciate the OP talking to them about their son's behavior.


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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #18 on: August 05, 2010, 12:31:21 PM »
A naked toddler running around in his own yard doesn't bother me. Shaking the fence and annoying the dog are the issues I would discuss with the neighbor.  Not the cops, childrens services etc.- just the kid's parents.  
Agreed. I would present it as an annoyance at the child taunting and riling up the dog. The child being naked on his own property is the parents decision and, while you were be perfectly fine in telling them it makes you uncomfortable, they would not be rude to refuse to change their habits (presuming legality, of course, but in the majority of places, this behavior would be fine). However, they would be rude to continue allowing the child to tease the dog. Personally, I wouldn't even mention that the actions APPEAR to be gyrating motions from your viewpoint, just that he's shaking the fencing and taunting the dog.

Beyond that, put up some bushes on that side of your yard.
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HeebyJeebyLeebee

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #19 on: August 05, 2010, 12:37:19 PM »
But I see no reason she can't say to the parents: "Your child is making me uncomfortable when he acts like that, plus he is upsetting the dog".

I'd change the order and put the dog first, with "also, him running around nekkid all the time makes me uncomfortable." I don't know if it'd actually make any difference, but something concrete like "harassing the dog and making it bark loudly" sounds like a safer opener to me.

I think this is a good route.
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Giggity

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #20 on: August 05, 2010, 12:42:34 PM »
Get you a nice privet hedge going. (I grew up calling it ligustrum.) Prickly and thick!
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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #21 on: August 05, 2010, 12:43:48 PM »
But it really is the nudity that seems to upset the dog.  The kid shakes the fence all the time and is one of the few people that the dog DOESN'T tend to bark at when they are next to the fence.  In fact, I think the kid is particularly good with my dog (who is very, very shy)--they have only met through the fence but seem to be on better terms than she is with most people.  It's only when he's naked that she gets so upset :)  


I can't plant bushes because I'm renting (I maybe the only renter--it goes Street-neighbor-Me-Naked-neighbor-four more yards-street) and I know the immediate three around me all own their halves.  If it was my property, we would have a 8 foot privacy fence and this would be a non-issue.

I have no idea how old the kid is, I'm not good at that sort of thing.  When does it stop being acceptable to be publicly totally nude?  Honestly, I can't imagine letting my kids run around naked in public--and when your yard is visible from the streets, it is public.  It makes me uncomfortable for a multitude of reasons.
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hobish

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #22 on: August 05, 2010, 12:47:34 PM »

You could ask your landlord to plant something, or if they would mind if you planted something.

The naked wouldn't bother me; but i'd be right ticked about the kid shaking the fence and riling up my dog. Some sort of fenceline planting may solve all three.


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Twik

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #23 on: August 05, 2010, 12:51:56 PM »
I apologize that I can't quote Harlow's post because my phone won't let me, but allow me to explain myself a little bit.  A kid running through the yard naked once in awhile is no big deal and fairly common.  The same child doing it all the time, and the parents being totally fine with it, when strangers can obviously see the child, does not sit well with me.  And maybe I read too much into it, but "gyrating" to me does have a not-so-nice connotation.  OP admits this makes her uncomfortable.  I would have enough concern fir the safety of the child to call the proper authorities.

While I get what you are saying, considering the average music video these days, I'm not sure that gyrating any longer qualifies as innapropriate 'sexual knowlege'.

I'd class it as "inappropriate, but not uncommon".
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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #24 on: August 05, 2010, 12:52:24 PM »
Or, if your landlord will not let you plant something see if you can install privacy slats in the fence. I have seen them here in Seattle but don't know how widespread they are. They are slats of plastic like blinds that you weave into the fence. They are a bit of work to install but it would block out the "view" and may help your dog not be disturbed as much.

DangerMouth

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #25 on: August 05, 2010, 01:06:15 PM »
I apologize that I can't quote Harlow's post because my phone won't let me, but allow me to explain myself a little bit.  A kid running through the yard naked once in awhile is no big deal and fairly common.  The same child doing it all the time, and the parents being totally fine with it, when strangers can obviously see the child, does not sit well with me.  And maybe I read too much into it, but "gyrating" to me does have a not-so-nice connotation.  OP admits this makes her uncomfortable.  I would have enough concern fir the safety of the child to call the proper authorities.

While I get what you are saying, considering the average music video these days, I'm not sure that gyrating any longer qualifies as innapropriate 'sexual knowlege'.

I'd class it as "inappropriate, but not uncommon".

I worded that poorly, I was actually aiming for 'innapropriate', but not because the child has sexual knowlege from abuse but rather mimicking something he doesn't understand. Lord knows my 9yo niece does a fair bit of shaking her booty, and I can (safely, I hope) assume it's because of music videos (mainly because she's singing Beyonce or Shakira while doing it :P)

hobish

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #26 on: August 05, 2010, 01:09:44 PM »
Or, if your landlord will not let you plant something see if you can install privacy slats in the fence. I have seen them here in Seattle but don't know how widespread they are. They are slats of plastic like blinds that you weave into the fence. They are a bit of work to install but it would block out the "view" and may help your dog not be disturbed as much.

I'm on the East Coast and we have those here, too. I think that is a good idea.
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PeasNCues

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #27 on: August 05, 2010, 01:14:19 PM »
OP: Why are you so bothered by an undressed little kid?  That seems to be more of an issue with you than the fence and the dog.

In many, many areas it is considered inappropriate for kids above a certain age to be running around in the buff.

3-5 does seem kind of old to do this.

It would make me really uncomfortable as well. But, that is in keeping with the societal norms of the area, so I know it's not just an "issue with me." :)
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jimithing

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #28 on: August 05, 2010, 01:16:54 PM »
I would call childrens services.  Neither a 3 yo or a 5 yo should have enough sexual knowledge to be intentionally gyrating naked in front of a neighbor.  Sexual knowledge that is too advanced for a child's age can be a symptom of abuse.  OP, I think the creepy feeling this gives you could be an intuition.

I work with abused children, and with children in general, and this is not true. I actually don't think that this is advanced knowledge for their age, and even if it were, advanced knowledge does not always indicate child abuse. I mimicked a lot of stuff I saw on TV, when I was that age, and I was never abused. I feel this suggestion it quite out of line.

Also, didn't we just have a thread about a poster who was sunbathing nude in their backyard, and everyone said that it was fine and no one else's business? I don't understand how this is any different?

I do agree that the issue with disturbing the dog, and shaking the fence can be addressed.

Browyn

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Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #29 on: August 05, 2010, 01:18:51 PM »
I apologize that I can't quote Harlow's post because my phone won't let me, but allow me to explain myself a little bit.  A kid running through the yard naked once in awhile is no big deal and fairly common.  The same child doing it all the time, and the parents being totally fine with it, when strangers can obviously see the child, does not sit well with me.  And maybe I read too much into it, but "gyrating" to me does have a not-so-nice connotation.  OP admits this makes her uncomfortable.  I would have enough concern fir the safety of the child to call the proper authorities.

While I get what you are saying, considering the average music video these days, I'm not sure that gyrating any longer qualifies as inappropriate 'sexual knowledge'.

I'd class it as "inappropriate, but not uncommon".

I agree he should not be outside naked but the "gyrating" could be very innocent.  The closest thing to a music video my 5 yr old has ever seen is watching "so you think you can dance" with me.  I watched him dancing and wiggling in front of the full length mirror after his bath recently.  He was amused because "Mummy, my pee pee bounces up and down"