Author Topic: Naked children in the yard  (Read 12176 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Carnation

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 5117
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #60 on: August 06, 2010, 12:15:35 AM »



One of my dogs is very particular about purses.  He doesn't like any purse that has a pattern or sparkes/decorations.  If it's all one color purse, he's fine. 

A Fashion Police dog?

saddened

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 345
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #61 on: August 06, 2010, 01:23:56 AM »
A bit O/T...

Is it common to have chain link fences so everyone can see into all the other yards?

I find this quite odd myself, since every single place I've lived has a fence where you just can't see into the neighbour's yards easily (I'm in Australia btw). I have to admit, I probably wouldn't even want to use my yard (even to just sit outside and enjoy the sunshine) if everyone could see in. It would feel very intrusive to me.

Back on topic...

I would approach the neighbour and raise the issue of the child shaking the fence to bother your dog. You really don't want other neighbours then complaining about a barking dog. If needed, you can bring up the fact that the child being naked seems to bother the dog more than when clothed.

Doll Fiend

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1009
  • The Dolls are in the Garden and in my Head.
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #62 on: August 06, 2010, 01:32:40 AM »
I would wonder what the local police would have to say if you called and questioned the Non-emergency line? They may have some suggestions based on OP's local laws and customs. Some neighborhoods, a naked toddler wouldn't bring a second glance. Others would warrant a call from CPS. And what if this child is 5 rather than 3. That is far more than just a toddler. That is an age that I would expect to know better.

I do know people who live their lives as naturists. They keep things though from the public eye. Privacy fences, bushes, trees, and live in an area were the neighbors are farther apart than average. Yes they enjoy their nudity. BUT They do not force others to see it either.

MariaE

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4714
  • So many books, so little time
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #63 on: August 06, 2010, 04:16:57 AM »
I would probably file a police complaint.  Myself and my guests should not have to subjected to a child's nudity just because the parents are OK with it.  I also don't think I should have to think up a clever ruse such as faux concern that the child get sunburned or bit as a basis for asking the parents to please clothe their child.  It's just not cool with me and I think the parents are entitled for foisting this situation off on their neighbors.

If the parents want to let their kids do this then they need to install a privacy fence.

I think that's a huge overreaction considering that the OP hasn't even tried talking to the parents yet. If she talks to the parents and they don't care or do nothing, then perhaps contact the police non-emergency line and ask for options, but talking to the parents should be the first step. Chances are, they don't even know it bothers her.
 
Dane by birth, Kiwi by choice

zoidberg

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2000
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #64 on: August 06, 2010, 05:10:17 AM »

ChristiKayAnn wrote:

"I keep having the thought that if the back yards are visible to the whole block it just isn't safe for this little one to be outside naked.  We can never know for sure who are neighbors are and I would be afraid of making a child a target to a predator by letting him (or her) run around unclothed where they could be seen."

Honestly, the presence or absence of clothing isn't likely to have much effect on his level of risk.  Anyone who's likely to try to do anything to him in a fenced-in backyard (or abduct him from such a yard) isn't going to be put off by the fact that he's in clothes.  It's the lack of supervision that matters here, and that's an entirely different discussion.

Virg

Absolutely agree with Virg. Predators target children because they're children. A naked child isn't more prone to being snatched than a woman in a short skirt is more prone to being raped.

Depending on the relationship with the neighbours, I really would drop the faux concern and simply ask them to stop because it's making you  and especially your DH uncomfortable. I think if I were your neighbout, I would be more sympathetic to a man being bothered about the proximity of a naked child.

penelope2017

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3022
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #65 on: August 06, 2010, 05:43:26 AM »
I would probably file a police complaint.  Myself and my guests should not have to subjected to a child's nudity just because the parents are OK with it.  I also don't think I should have to think up a clever ruse such as faux concern that the child get sunburned or bit as a basis for asking the parents to please clothe their child.  It's just not cool with me and I think the parents are entitled for foisting this situation off on their neighbors.

If the parents want to let their kids do this then they need to install a privacy fence.

I think that's a huge overreaction considering that the OP hasn't even tried talking to the parents yet. If she talks to the parents and they don't care or do nothing, then perhaps contact the police non-emergency line and ask for options, but talking to the parents should be the first step. Chances are, they don't even know it bothers her.

Agreed. And not sure about how busy the police are in the OP's neighborhood, but most likely the above is what they'd say in response to a call.

LTrew

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 307
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #66 on: August 06, 2010, 07:28:05 AM »
You could always look into fence slats, they're removable but will block your line of sight and would make it more difficult to shake the fence.
I would find it annoying to have to pay out money to solve a problem that could be taken care of by some underpants though, and would talk to the neighbours first.

Curly Wurly Doggie Breath

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3414
  • Aussie's Rule
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #67 on: August 06, 2010, 07:31:07 AM »
Shade cloth is  Really cheep, pick a very dark green or Black, can you just string some up along the fence as a barrier. It's hard to see through that up agains a wire fence  8)

                          The Southern Cross Flag. Australia

MommyPenguin

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4554
    • My blog!
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #68 on: August 06, 2010, 08:47:00 AM »
Chain link fences generally aren't that high.  While blocking the sight might help with the little boy shaking the fence and the dog getting upset, chances are that the OP can see right over the fence, so blocking it won't help her and her DH's view of the yard.

I think we've established from several other threads that some parents have still-un-potty-trained 4-year-olds, so even if the boy is at the upper end of the OP's estimated age range, it's quite possible that he's being potty trained.  Nonetheless, I think 3-5 is old enough that you can't really get away with letting them hang out naked unless you have a private yard, so it's the neighbors' responsibility to either shield their yard or find another method of potty-training (if that's what they're doing).  My daughter is 3, and she's definitely way too old to be naked in public, so I think that even if the boy is at the younger age of that range, he's too old.  3 might be a toddler according to some definitions, but in terms of body modesty, in this culture it's old enough to need clothes.  We're working on getting her to stop lifting up her dresses and such, which is an ongoing process (with lots of "or you have to change into something else"), but at least in that case the most she's showing is underwear/tights.

OP, as long as the boy is obviously not a young toddler (less steady on the feet, falls when he runs, speaks incomprehensibly or in baby babbles), it's reasonable to speak to the neighbors first, then *if* they push off your concerns or nothing changes, call the police non-emergency line and ask whether it's okay for him to hang out naked or whether there's anything they can do.

EnoughAlready22

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 161
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #69 on: August 06, 2010, 08:57:19 AM »
Is this a cultural thing?  Where I live, this would not be ok.  The child should at least have on a diaper or underwear.  I've also never heard of letting your child run around naked while potty training.  My son is 5 and I didn't do that.  To me, part of potty training is having the child know when they need to go, pulling down their pants and going in the potty.  Maybe I'm missing something here.

Marleigh

  • Guest
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #70 on: August 06, 2010, 09:21:12 AM »
Is this a cultural thing?  Where I live, this would not be ok.  The child should at least have on a diaper or underwear.  I've also never heard of letting your child run around naked while potty training.  My son is 5 and I didn't do that.  To me, part of potty training is having the child know when they need to go, pulling down their pants and going in the potty.  Maybe I'm missing something here.

I'm with ya, running around naked in the yard and "going" wherever you want doesn't sound like a logical potty training method at all.

magiccat26

  • Goddess in training!
  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2329
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #71 on: August 06, 2010, 09:24:49 AM »
Is this a cultural thing?  Where I live, this would not be ok.  The child should at least have on a diaper or underwear.  I've also never heard of letting your child run around naked while potty training.  My son is 5 and I didn't do that.  To me, part of potty training is having the child know when they need to go, pulling down their pants and going in the potty.  Maybe I'm missing something here.

I'm with ya, running around naked in the yard and "going" wherever you want doesn't sound like a logical potty training method at all.

I forget the name of the method, but there is a "free range" potty training method that involves leaving your child naked.  Not one I chose, but I remember reading about it somewhere....
“If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.” — Catherine Aird

Marleigh

  • Guest
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #72 on: August 06, 2010, 09:25:50 AM »
Chain link fences generally aren't that high.  While blocking the sight might help with the little boy shaking the fence and the dog getting upset, chances are that the OP can see right over the fence, so blocking it won't help her and her DH's view of the yard.

I think we've established from several other threads that some parents have still-un-potty-trained 4-year-olds, so even if the boy is at the upper end of the OP's estimated age range, it's quite possible that he's being potty trained.  Nonetheless, I think 3-5 is old enough that you can't really get away with letting them hang out naked unless you have a private yard, so it's the neighbors' responsibility to either shield their yard or find another method of potty-training (if that's what they're doing).  My daughter is 3, and she's definitely way too old to be naked in public, so I think that even if the boy is at the younger age of that range, he's too old.  3 might be a toddler according to some definitions, but in terms of body modesty, in this culture it's old enough to need clothes.  We're working on getting her to stop lifting up her dresses and such, which is an ongoing process (with lots of "or you have to change into something else"), but at least in that case the most she's showing is underwear/tights.

OP, as long as the boy is obviously not a young toddler (less steady on the feet, falls when he runs, speaks incomprehensibly or in baby babbles), it's reasonable to speak to the neighbors first, then *if* they push off your concerns or nothing changes, call the police non-emergency line and ask whether it's okay for him to hang out naked or whether there's anything they can do.

This also highlights my discomfort with this situation.  I have several little nieces and nephews, and actually, by age 2, they have all displayed signs of modesty.  If they're walking around their home half-clothed and a stranger walks in, they'll run and hide, or they'll get upset if someone tries to take a picture of them in just a diaper, etc.  I know not all kids are the same, and we don't know the exact age of the child in the OP, but it still just seems inappropriate to me.

marcel

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2025
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #73 on: August 06, 2010, 09:43:25 AM »
Is this a cultural thing?  Where I live, this would not be ok.  The child should at least have on a diaper or underwear.  I've also never heard of letting your child run around naked while potty training.  My son is 5 and I didn't do that.  To me, part of potty training is having the child know when they need to go, pulling down their pants and going in the potty.  Maybe I'm missing something here.

I'm with ya, running around naked in the yard and "going" wherever you want doesn't sound like a logical potty training method at all.
I didn't see any going wherever in the OP.
I believe that potty training methods, where people don't use diapers are actually about teaching a child at an early age where and when  to go.
And the acceptability of going around naked, is definitely a cultural thing. Some countries are much more prudish in this respect then others. Where I live, I do not think that many people would think it was bad if parents let a 5 year old walk around naked on their own property.
Wherever you go..... There you are.

Crystal

  • Guest
Re: Naked children in the yard
« Reply #74 on: August 06, 2010, 10:36:38 AM »
Disclaimer: I my country it is generally acceptable to let young children run naked in certain places such as beaches (in fact, it is acceptable for all ages to be naked in public in some contexts), so I don't have much experience with these kind of situations (we mostly tell someone to dress the kids to protect against nettles or something). I've also lurked around and this is my first post, and I hope I don't break any rules, if I do, I humbly apologise.

I would raise the dog issue and the supervision issue.

Basically, try to word it that their son's rattling of the fence provokes the dog, but not in an accusatory way (I've found some parents who really doesn't take well to criticisms towards their children). Word it that you're worried about barking complaints and that the dog usually don't bark, but that the fence rattling can set it off.

Then, you could add that you're worried about the lack of supervision, as even if the garden is a safe zone, a child can get into lots of trouble, and feral animals, and wild animals in general, can get in. Look up if there's snakes in your area and suggest that in order to protect against snake-bites, the child should at least wear shoes, same if there's poisonous amphibians and insects. In fact, if there's dangerous insects, you could suggest him being fully clothed to prevent bites.

Basically, something like, "Hello neighbour, I feel terrible to ask you this, but could you please keep your son from rattling the fence between our gardens. It provokes my dog's instincts to bark, and I'm worried about the noise. Also, I noticed your son running barefoot and I'm worried about snakes/splinters/insects/animals getting to him."

Hopefully they'll think it'll look too ridiculous to have him run around naked but with shoes on that they'll at least put a diaper or underpants on him.

If there's poisonous plants around, you could always raise that they need to be with him at all times in the garden, because he might get his hands on those plants and become sick.

But, if nothing else, raise the splinter issue. One summer I ran around barefoot and ended up with blood poisoning because of a splinter. The treatment isn't fun, and the capsules I had to take were so large that I point blank refused, and if there hadn't been a great chemist with a home-brewed salve around, I could have died, or lost my entire right leg, so definitely suggest shoes at the very least.

But if you want to, you could go blunt and tell them how it is. In your family, it isn't the norm to let children above a certain age go naked in public, and it hinders your enjoyment and upkeep of the garden.

Just don't make it too much about the son being naked, because then a very protective parent might go "Neighbour thinks waaay too much about my son's state of dress" and well, it snowballs from there. Make it about norms and the practicality of the garden.