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Author Topic: Snoring  (Read 11755 times)

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« on: August 10, 2010, 09:55:20 AM »
If someone is snoring loudly, who should move to another room to get some sleep?  The non-snorer as they have control over their actions or the snorer for disrupting the sleep of the other person/people in the room?  If there is more than two people in the room, such as family visiting and people sleeping on air mattresses on the floor, does it change?


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Re: Snoring
« Reply #1 on: August 10, 2010, 10:10:01 AM »
I think the person who is bothered should take responsibilities for changing their circumstances. 

Ideally this would be worked out before bedtime, though.  I think that if someone knows they snore, they should warn people they will be sharing a room with so that their roommates can arrange for ear plugs/headphones, plan to sleep on the couch, etc.

In a family situation I would think everyone would be aware of the snoring ahead of time, so there should be a plan for when the snorer starts snoring.


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Re: Snoring
« Reply #2 on: August 10, 2010, 10:22:08 AM »
Snoring isn't like other annoying behaviors, in that the snorer cannot control it. The alternative would be to require the snorer to stay awake all night to avoid snoring. I think it would be rude to awaken someone and tell them to move, rather than just moving myself. If the alternative accommodations are satisfactory, why would the disturbed person mind switching? And if they're in some way unsatisfactory (eg, a narrow short couch), it sort of comes off as vindictive- I will disturb YOUR sleep and demand you sleep on the short couch because you disturbed mine.
OTOH, I think that snorers owe it to whomever they may be sharing sleeping space with, to warn them that they snore and be prepared to pay for alternative arrangements if the snoring is just too much for the nonsnorers to sleep through.


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Re: Snoring
« Reply #3 on: August 10, 2010, 10:30:31 AM »
As much as I would love to kick Sweet Pattootie out to another room, it's just easier for me to move.  

1) I'm already awake
2) He's really grumpy when he's woken up
3) The snoring already compromises the quality of his sleep.  Waking him up and making him get up and move would further compromise it.  
4) He'd still be grumpy and annoyed with me in the morning.  No sense in us both being grumpy and annoyed with each other.

I don't think it's fair - not by a long shot.  But it's easier.   ::)  I really want him to finish the sleep study and get on a c-pap.
« Last Edit: August 10, 2010, 12:22:20 PM by HeebyJeebyLeebee »
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Re: Snoring
« Reply #4 on: August 10, 2010, 11:00:10 AM »
I don't think there is a right or wrong, you do what works for your situation.  I make an effort to fall asleep before DH, because once I'm asleep I don't hear his snoring unless it's extremely loud.  But if DH knows he's going to be snoring a lot (allergies, cold, etc.), he goes to another room to sleep so that he doesn't run the risk of disturbing my sleep. 
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Re: Snoring
« Reply #5 on: August 10, 2010, 11:33:16 AM »
The reason I ask...

Dh snores.  He's also a reasonably light sleeper and wakens if I get out of bed but is back to sleep within a minute.  I'm a reasonably heavy sleeper except lately I've been having a harder time falling asleep and I wake several times a night (he does too).

We have a guest room with a queen size bed and an office with a futon.  We've tried several times to sleep in separate rooms but we like sleeping in the same bed so last night, I moved to the guest room when I couldn't sleep due to dh's snoring.  He feels badly and thinks he should move to one of the other beds and I feel that I'm the one with the issue and he isn't snoring on purpose so I'll move.

He uses breathe right strips which help some but he has a weird septum from a broken nose when he was a kid and should probably have it fixed but he's a pilot and doesn't want to have anything on his health record.  Plus he's a wimp with pain.  ;)


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Re: Snoring
« Reply #6 on: August 10, 2010, 12:22:16 PM »
I think it's really up to the individual couple to work out, versus having a standard that everyone should adhere to.  For us, DH moves when he snores.  We co-sleep with a baby and a toddler, so I get to keep the comfy king bed with them. 


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Re: Snoring
« Reply #7 on: August 10, 2010, 12:41:19 PM »
In our group of friends, when we do overnight activities, we have a rule: all the snorers sleep together in the same area, away from the rest of us who would be disrupted by it. I've also seen this rule in place at other get-away events. Problem solved.

To me, it's on the person who is unintentionally being disruptive (the snorer) to find a solution.


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Re: Snoring
« Reply #8 on: August 10, 2010, 12:50:05 PM »
Well, DH and I agree that we would rather sleep together with his snoring than separately and in peace.  ;)

However, I tend to think the snorer should move. If there are four people in a room and one is snoring, it makes more sense for the one person to move.

If it's just two people, it probably depends on who moves easiest. I don't sleep as heavily as my DH, but I also LOVE sleeping on couches. I would sleep on a couch every night if I could find a way to comfortably fit my DH and MyBestFriend dog with me.  ;D It makes more sense for me to move. I would hate to see someone tell their spouse, who maybe can't sleep anywhere except his own bed, that he has to move since he's the one who is snoring.


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Re: Snoring
« Reply #9 on: August 10, 2010, 01:26:27 PM »
In our group of friends, when we do overnight activities, we have a rule: all the snorers sleep together in the same area, away from the rest of us who would be disrupted by it. I've also seen this rule in place at other get-away events. Problem solved.

LOL!  When Sweet Pattootie and I camp with other people, we usually rent 2 or more congruent campsites and set set our tent as far away from the others as possible (suggesting we use the area in the middle of the sites as the common area).  I always wear earplugs, and I bring new, unused extras for anyone who needs them.

One friend didn't believe me when I said SP's snoring sounded like a growling mad animal.  Then he camped with us.   >:D 
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Re: Snoring
« Reply #10 on: August 10, 2010, 01:36:16 PM »
In our house, I'm the snorer, but my husband moves to the couch if it wakes him up. Mostly because I'm a very heavy sleeper and it is impossible to wake me up, even just enough to get me to roll over.

He can sleep through it if he's already asleep, so I try to get him to go to bed before I do. However, if I'm really tired and he is showing no signs of getting sleepy, I give him fair warning and then go to bed. I am only willing to compromise so far, and staying up and compromising my sleep is just too far past the line.

We just keep a blanket stored near the couch, and his eye mask, and it works pretty well for us. I'd rather be in the same bed all the time, but he is bringing in the only income right now so he really needs to be alert at work!

Clara Bow

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Re: Snoring
« Reply #11 on: August 11, 2010, 04:59:39 AM »
I have earplugs. They are miraculous.
I have finally found the bar I can't get thrown out of....


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Re: Snoring
« Reply #12 on: August 11, 2010, 05:15:17 AM »
Its me thats bothered so its me that leaves.  Though we have been trying to work together to sort the problem.

I also have earplugs, and had to go through a few makes to get ones that shut out the noise.  I finally got some from a gun range (clay pigeon shooting) which made the noise only mildly worth beating him to death with his own slippers while he sleeps.  I have herbal sleeping aids too.

I have also bought him non allergy nose strips, which also do help a bit.  when all else fails, I gently kick the bed in between us to make it bounce in order to try and get him to turn over.

But to be honest, I just go in the next room if I have an important meeting in the morning.  Or am just on the point of homicide.

Essentially with my chap snoring, its like trying to throw cotton balls on the pavement to drown out the sound of a pneumatic drill.


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Re: Snoring
« Reply #13 on: August 11, 2010, 06:52:32 AM »

If it's a regular issue, then the burden should be shared.

In other words, the non snoring spouse shouldn't be relegated to sleeping on a lumpy couch for the rest of the marriage for something that isn't their fault. The same applies to someone who snores and can't help it. So they can take turns.

This, of course, assumes, that the snorer has gone to a doctor to check for underlying medical problems, and tried the standard remedies. If they insist that they don't snore, then they should sleep on the floor.  >:(

Akarui Kibuno

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Re: Snoring
« Reply #14 on: August 11, 2010, 07:15:44 AM »
I snore. A lot, it seems, at least according to Plushie. My mom never complained about it (we had to share a room for a few months, difficult situation) , but I guess that's because she's my mom  ;D .

Plushie has known I snore for a long time (yay to theme park stays with hotel rooms and groups of friends haha) , and now that we're together, he nudges me during the night when I make "too much noise" and it makes me stop for a while, apparently... although I have to admit that over the past few days I've stayed awake longer, so much that he nudges me even when I'm awake, which is weird. But I digress.

He does have earplugs for when he can't bear it. I've offered to sleep in the living room a few times, but he refuses and says that he's got to learn how to live with it. Which I find cute :) .

But I still warn "new" people (when I visit places and stuff) that I snore, to see what they want to do. Not my fault I snore, and not theirs either, but I find it easier to speak about it openly and take the initiative of accomodating people since I'm the noise maker :P .
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