Author Topic: I'm not bossy, you're not working!  (Read 4278 times)

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Seraphia

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Re: I'm not bossy, you're not working!
« Reply #15 on: August 10, 2010, 04:08:03 PM »
If the manager wants to relay something through you ask her to write it down and just give them the note.  That way it isn't from you, it is from manager.  

It sounds like you have a higher expectation than your manager does and if so you will continue to be frustrated.  

Well, the notes thing is another point where communication breaks down in the store. There is note up right now about how Manager needs a Dr.'s note for illness-related absence, and that requests for time off cannot be for longer than five days. But even though I've sat there, signed the paperwork in front of them and said, hey we all need to sign these, the paperwork doesn't get signed. And then I get asked "Did So-and-So sign the paperwork? Make sure you remind her to."  ::)

ETA: And yes, you're right, I am frustrated. I don't feel like there's really any authority at all, as Manager doesn't like to confront people directly, except for really egregious stuff. Everything else is notes and verbal relays.

I agree with a PP: phrase everything as coming from your manager.  The bit about "did so-and-so sign the paperwork?"  Phrase it as, "Manager asked me to remind you to sign that paperwork."

They don't do their jobs?  Not your problem - turn it all over to your manager.  She's the one getting paid to deal with it.  Document what you do, what you're supposed to do, and leave the rest up to them.

Really though, I'd go looking for another job.  Since your manager doesn't want to do her job, it sounds like you'll end up doing all the work while your coworkers slack off.  That's not fair on you.



ITA. Everything that is frustrating to you about this job would make you a really desirable, on-the-ball manager elsewhere. And while it's a pretty slow economy right now, you are never more attractive to an employer than when you are already employed elsewhere. Wouldn't hurt to look, KWIM?

Absolutely! I have applications out to several places (I have a BA, so I'm hoping for something in editing, tech writing, or in a university setting). It's just the meanwhile that I need to keep my sanity. I keep telling myself that no matter what, I'm not doing a third Christmas in retail.

I do feel bad though. I want to tell my boss all my concerns, all the ways I think the store can run more profitably, and it won't matter. Manager just hires the first pulse that enters the store after a vacancy appears, and I can't convince her that an actual interview would help so much. I asked her flat-out why she hired Mindy: "Well, she needs the job. And she was the first one to have an application in after Jane." (Jane lasted all of two weeks. And Mindy was hired two days after Jane quit.)
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Shoo

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Re: I'm not bossy, you're not working!
« Reply #16 on: August 10, 2010, 04:15:34 PM »

I guess I should stop working so hard, so that more things do get left undone.

Definitely.

camlan

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Re: I'm not bossy, you're not working!
« Reply #17 on: August 10, 2010, 05:53:26 PM »


Well, the notes thing is another point where communication breaks down in the store. There is note up right now about how Manager needs a Dr.'s note for illness-related absence, and that requests for time off cannot be for longer than five days. But even though I've sat there, signed the paperwork in front of them and said, hey we all need to sign these, the paperwork doesn't get signed. And then I get asked "Did So-and-So sign the paperwork? Make sure you remind her to."  ::)



And that's the point where you look at your manager all wide-eyed and tell her that a) since you are all equals, they will see this as you ordering them around and b) when you do "remind" them to do something, they run to her and cry that you are "bossy." And then stand there and let your manager come up with a solution.
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn

LEMon

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Re: I'm not bossy, you're not working!
« Reply #18 on: August 10, 2010, 07:39:28 PM »
What kind of referral would you get from this manager if you work yourself crazy?  What kind of referral would you get if you relax?  What kind of pay increase (or additional hours) are you getting for all your work?  More than they get for sitting out smoking?  Time to do what you were assigned, not pass on messages or reminders, and let manager suffer for her own incompetence.  You are saving her neck but getting no reward.  Time to pull back.  This is a job, not your life's dream job.  If and when the manager begins to make changes, you are willing to help and step up.  But not until.

She doesn't need to change her very flawed style until this inventory goes very wrong, headquarters or accounting starts complaining about paperwork or the drop in sales (due to the smokers).  Pull back and let her learn.

If she says anything about you not passing on messages, "that would go better coming from you.  I'm their equal and I don't want them to think I am bossy."

(I know this sounds harsh, but think about it ... you get all the stress, she gets it easy.)

Marguette

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Re: I'm not bossy, you're not working!
« Reply #19 on: August 10, 2010, 07:52:02 PM »
Well, the notes thing is another point where communication breaks down in the store. There is note up right now about how Manager needs a Dr.'s note for illness-related absence, and that requests for time off cannot be for longer than five days. But even though I've sat there, signed the paperwork in front of them and said, hey we all need to sign these, the paperwork doesn't get signed. And then I get asked "Did So-and-So sign the paperwork? Make sure you remind her to."  ::)

And that's the point where you look at your manager all wide-eyed and tell her that a) since you are all equals, they will see this as you ordering them around and b) when you do "remind" them to do something, they run to her and cry that you are "bossy." And then stand there and let your manager come up with a solution.
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Let the manager sort out the contradiction. Either you are all equals and you do not give orders, or your job function includes telling them what to do.

Corvid

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Re: I'm not bossy, you're not working!
« Reply #20 on: August 11, 2010, 09:48:31 AM »
By taking advantage of your strong work ethic, your boss has the best of both worlds and at your expense.  Things still get done and you're cast as the heavy so she can be the nice guy to the other employees.  It's probably not consciously done, but that's the comfortable (for her) end result.  She's not likely to make any changes until things are no longer so comfortable for her.  Unfortunately, that probably won't happen until you finally leave.

I suggest you start to disengage.  There is no reason for you to bust your butt to pick up the slack for your fellow employees.  If you are doing your share of the work, you've earned your paycheck.  Let your boss start dealing with consequences of her hiring choices and your fellow employees the consequences of their poor working habits.

bopper

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Re: I'm not bossy, you're not working!
« Reply #21 on: August 11, 2010, 10:33:22 AM »

If she says anything about you not passing on messages, "that would go better coming from you.  I'm their equal and I don't want them to think I am bossy."

or "I think that would be better coming from you. They consider me their peer and don't take directin from me. Now, what should I do with that shipment of bean dip that came in?"

Seraphia

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Re: I'm not bossy, you're not working!
« Reply #22 on: August 11, 2010, 02:27:29 PM »
By taking advantage of your strong work ethic, your boss has the best of both worlds and at your expense.  Things still get done and you're cast as the heavy so she can be the nice guy to the other employees.  It's probably not consciously done, but that's the comfortable (for her) end result.  She's not likely to make any changes until things are no longer so comfortable for her.  Unfortunately, that probably won't happen until you finally leave.

I suggest you start to disengage.  There is no reason for you to bust your butt to pick up the slack for your fellow employees.  If you are doing your share of the work, you've earned your paycheck.  Let your boss start dealing with consequences of her hiring choices and your fellow employees the consequences of their poor working habits.

You're probably right. I was raised in a home where both parents were self-employed, so my mindset is: "work isn't sitting, work is working." It's hard for me to sit still, knowing that there are lots of things that could get done, and that nobody has been assigned to do them. We don't have "assigned duties" it's just a big ol' lump of Stuff That Must Be Done.

Plus, I guess I'm worried about having it flung in my face. "Well, Seraphia's reading, why shouldn't we?"
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ShadowLady

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Re: I'm not bossy, you're not working!
« Reply #23 on: August 11, 2010, 03:06:15 PM »
... the paperwork doesn't get signed. And then I get asked "Did So-and-So sign the paperwork? Make sure you remind her to."  ::)


And that's the point where you look at your manager all wide-eyed and tell her that a) since you are all equals, they will see this as you ordering them around and b) when you do "remind" them to do something, they run to her and cry that you are "bossy." And then stand there and let your manager come up with a solution.

If she says anything about you not passing on messages, "that would go better coming from you.  I'm their equal and I don't want them to think I am bossy."

Both LEmon and Camlan said exactly what I was going to post - that the reminders need to come from her, not you, because you've been accused of being bossy.

TootsNYC

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Re: I'm not bossy, you're not working!
« Reply #24 on: August 12, 2010, 12:34:04 AM »
If the manager wants to relay something through you ask her to write it down and just give them the note.  That way it isn't from you, it is from manager.  

It sounds like you have a higher expectation than your manager does and if so you will continue to be frustrated.  

Well, the notes thing is another point where communication breaks down in the store. There is note up right now about how Manager needs a Dr.'s note for illness-related absence, and that requests for time off cannot be for longer than five days. But even though I've sat there, signed the paperwork in front of them and said, hey we all need to sign these, the paperwork doesn't get signed. And then I get asked "Did So-and-So sign the paperwork? Make sure you remind her to."  ::)

ETA: And yes, you're right, I am frustrated. I don't feel like there's really any authority at all, as Manager doesn't like to confront people directly, except for really egregious stuff. Everything else is notes and verbal relays.

And then you say, "I'm not comfortable doing that. You've already told me there's a problem w/ me being perceived as bossy. You'll have to ask them directly."