Author Topic: Forum topic warnings  (Read 7049 times)

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Brentwood

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #30 on: August 16, 2010, 11:07:49 PM »


I'm not advocating 'bodily functions' threads, but I hate to see misinformation get spread. It's possible my asking for brand names was the real no-no, not the 'T' recco's bit.

I can't point to a specific rule or thread, but I know I have seen threads closed for such a reason, and it may well be at the discretion of the moderators. Maybe someone else can recall when or where.

(Incidentally, I know of no rule that would ban asking for specific product recommendations by brand name.)

Paper Roses

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #31 on: August 16, 2010, 11:17:45 PM »
I cannot BELIEVE you posted that. You KNOW how terrified I am of cake.  >:D

Ok, now I'm going to start a thread and put in big letters right after the title:  "WARNING:  CAKE MENTIONED, ALSO FROSTING"   >:D
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DangerMouth

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #32 on: August 16, 2010, 11:18:37 PM »
Cathy: It must be a 'mod + squeaky wheel' thing, because after veiwing that 'ladies leaking' thread, I thought my asking for t recommendations was pretty tame, KWIM? :)

zyrs

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #33 on: August 17, 2010, 06:27:46 AM »
I think I am the person who posted "Warning: mentions reptiles".  I do that for any story that mentions reptiles, even during conversation.  I also say/write "Warning:mentions arachnids" if a story mentions spiders.

I knew someone that would completely freak out even hearing the words spider, snake and lizard.  Whether it started out as real panic or started out as an affectation that after years had become real panic, it was so bad that she would scream and go lock herself in the bathroom a even the mention of those words.  Then it would take hours of apologizing to get her to come out of the bathroom, which was embarrassing, especially if we had guests or were visiting other people's homes.

She didn't freak out at the words "reptile" or "arachnid".  So I would use them as warnings.


Alex the Seal

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #34 on: August 17, 2010, 06:59:57 AM »
I honestly don't have a problem with any of the warnings I've seen here, or any I can imagine. Even if not strictly necessary in some cases, it's a kindly intended thing and that can only be good.

Amava

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #35 on: August 17, 2010, 07:32:56 AM »
I honestly don't have a problem with any of the warnings I've seen here, or any I can imagine. Even if not strictly necessary in some cases, it's a kindly intended thing and that can only be good.
Pod. People are doing it to do good. I usually don't think it's necessary but it doesn't annoy me or anything.

katarain

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #36 on: August 17, 2010, 07:58:05 AM »
I think I am the person who posted "Warning: mentions reptiles".  I do that for any story that mentions reptiles, even during conversation.  I also say/write "Warning:mentions arachnids" if a story mentions spiders.

I knew someone that would completely freak out even hearing the words spider, snake and lizard.  Whether it started out as real panic or started out as an affectation that after years had become real panic, it was so bad that she would scream and go lock herself in the bathroom a even the mention of those words.  Then it would take hours of apologizing to get her to come out of the bathroom, which was embarrassing, especially if we had guests or were visiting other people's homes.

She didn't freak out at the words "reptile" or "arachnid".  So I would use them as warnings.



I know this is off topic, but her behavior would annoy me SO much.  If I were hosting, I would probably tell her that I found spiders in that bathroom before, just to get her out of my house.  I'm sure it would be true, but if that's rude, then I certainly wouldn't be apologizing outside of the door for hours. I'd let her stay in there and go about my party. 

Giggity

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #37 on: August 17, 2010, 08:10:41 AM »
I knew someone that would completely freak out even hearing the words spider, snake and lizard.  Whether it started out as real panic or started out as an affectation that after years had become real panic, it was so bad that she would scream and go lock herself in the bathroom a even the mention of those words.  Then it would take hours of apologizing to get her to come out of the bathroom, which was embarrassing, especially if we had guests or were visiting other people's homes.

Lord have mercy. I am unsure whether I could put up with that, as I am afraid I would view it as an affectation no matter how long she'd been affecting it.
Words mean things.

Winterlight

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #38 on: August 17, 2010, 09:35:05 AM »
I knew someone that would completely freak out even hearing the words spider, snake and lizard.  Whether it started out as real panic or started out as an affectation that after years had become real panic, it was so bad that she would scream and go lock herself in the bathroom a even the mention of those words.  Then it would take hours of apologizing to get her to come out of the bathroom, which was embarrassing, especially if we had guests or were visiting other people's homes.

Lord have mercy. I am unsure whether I could put up with that, as I am afraid I would view it as an affectation no matter how long she'd been affecting it.

I agree- this is something she really needs to get a grip on.
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sparksals

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #39 on: August 17, 2010, 10:48:46 AM »
This is very interesting to me.  I just posted a topic with a warning b/c it seemed like the thing to do in this forum.  Personally, I agree with the PPs.  I don't need warnings on topics.  If I open a thread & don't like the topic discussed, I back out.  No biggie.

I agree. I'm an adult, I don't need warnings. But as that's the culture of this particular forum, I'll warn if I ever need to post on a sensitive topic.

I do think it goes a bit far sometimes, and I wonder if it isn't catering to SS's to a certain degree to do this. Certainly we try to be polite and considerate here, but this is still real world stuff we are seeking advice on.

I've been here for a looooong time.  I don't believe the warnings are the culture of this forum.  It is a new phenomena here that I don't think is necessary.  My eyes bulge out at some of the warnings. 

Then there's the posts that try to hide certain words by changing to a light colour.  There is one thread where a very normal and common medical procedure is dimmed and one must highlight to read it.  For the life of me, I can't figure out why it could be deemed offensive or upsetting to others that it needed to be hidden.

I frequently see 'death mentioned' as a thread title warning.  Death is a normal part of life.  Many of the warnings are a normal part of life.  While the warnings may be an attempt to be considerate, I believe they go OTT.  As someone upthread pointed out, everyone has their triggers. 

sparksals

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #40 on: August 17, 2010, 10:55:09 AM »
The same with pets - many people at my stage of life have had to make difficult decisions already.  I will admit that I'm not a reptile-lover, and if someone's initial post provided a picture of a huge snake, I would indeed appreciate a heads-up.  But, regarding more mainstream pets such as cats/dogs/guinea pigs etc. - I think most pet owners know that we won't have them forever

While that may be true, the pain of losing one still hurts greatly.  I am very appreciative of the people who do put a disclaimer in their title, because those threads do still hurt to read.  I'd rather know in advance that it could be something I want to skip over.  Getting into the thread and backing out is too late.  By then, I've read more details than I probably wanted to - and probably now hurt more than I absolutely wanted to.

Please do not stop putting those kinds of warnings on those types of threads.  Some of you may not have any problem with reading about the death of animals.  But, there are some who still do - and some who are going through fresh pain of losing one now.  It's a simple gesture that's beneficial (and polite) to your fellow EHellions.  I'd hope that fact alone would keep us doing it.



How is one to title a thread called 'Fluffy passed away' or 'Our hamster died' and provide a warning?  Part of the problem is thread titles don't seem to reflect the topic of the post.  There are frequently threads titled 'help with issue'... what kind of issue?  Add 'pet death mentioned'?    Wouldn't the title trigger the emotions too rather than just having a title appropriately named?

I cry when I hear of the death of a pet because I, too, know how it hurts to lose one.  I can relate to the poster's pain when they write about it.  But it is a normal part of life when a pet or family member dies.  We can't possibly warn everyone about every single trigger in the world.  

What if someone has an aversion to say, clowns?  Do we cease posting a title with 'clown' in it?  Where do we draw the line?  It could get to be way over-used which, IMHO, it already is.

ETA:  *sigh* Subsequently reading the thread, I see someone does have an aversion to clowns.  This is my point.  Where does it end?  I don't think the mere *mention* of a word that is not about other obvious warnings mentioned above is necessary. 

I hate snakes.  Can't stand them.  The thought of them terrifies me.  If I know there is a snake in the zoo or in a picture, I just don't look at it.  I'm not going to expect people to anticipate my every phobia or fear because of something that I may have difficulty with for my own personal reasons.  I can't portray onto an entire forum *my* personal aversions.
« Last Edit: August 17, 2010, 11:06:24 AM by sparksals »

sparksals

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #41 on: August 17, 2010, 10:59:55 AM »
This is very interesting to me.  I just posted a topic with a warning b/c it seemed like the thing to do in this forum.  Personally, I agree with the PPs.  I don't need warnings on topics.  If I open a thread & don't like the topic discussed, I back out.  No biggie.

(bolding on previous post mine)

This is why the warning are suddenly so prevalent.   If I just came to this forum, I would assume that it was 'the thing to do here', because so many of the posts recently have 'Warnings'.   Every time someone adds a warning to a thread title, more people think it's the norm.

I believe it is the exact same thing as people not using brand names or store names.   A poster sees one person writing 'Bullseye Store' instead of Target, and assumes that this forum wants you to mask names.  So they themselves start masking names.

It is just a cycle that keeps going and going and going :)

This is exactly what I was thinking.  I don't know why stores are masked either.   It is not against the rules to say "I saw something really nutz at Walmart yesterday".  
You are very right that it is something new that could possibly be because new members think it is the norm when it really hasn't been.

DangerMouth

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #42 on: August 17, 2010, 11:35:24 AM »
Thank you, sparksals, you said it better than I did.

I could certainly see a clarification if I posted a thread entitled "Pics of Fluffy" when 'Fluffy' was, in fact, one of my fuzzy tarantulas :D, but in many cases, it's just things that are part of everyone's life. Births, deaths, marriages, divorce, etc.

Dorrie78

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #43 on: August 17, 2010, 12:13:03 PM »
I just want to add that I tend to get kind of annoyed when people use some cutesy nickname for a brand - whether it's a store or a product. Just say "Walmart" or "Target" or whatever. I also find the increased number of thread warnings to also be annoying. Sure, warn us if the thread talks about a tragic death or detailed (and gross!) medical issue, but warning because it mentions a reptile? Seems way over the top to me. I'm afraid that if we spend all of our time tiptoe-ing around every possible phobia, we are barely going to have time to discuss the etiquette issues at hand.

We need to be aware of societal norms, but in our efforts to be polite (naturally!), I think we get carried away with our warnings.

YMMV....

DottyG

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Re: Forum topic warnings
« Reply #44 on: August 17, 2010, 12:42:57 PM »
Then there's the posts that try to hide certain words by changing to a light colour.  There is one thread where a very normal and common medical procedure is dimmed and one must highlight to read it.  For the life of me, I can't figure out why it could be deemed offensive or upsetting to others that it needed to be hidden.

It may not be to protect YOU.  It could be that the poster doesn't want to just yell out - "HEY, I GOT AN STD THE OTHER DAY, AND I'M NOT SURE WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT."  Perhaps the shading is more for their own wishes to not broadcast something boldly (but still be able to get feedback on it here) rather than to protect your sensabilities.