Author Topic: So... are we on the same page with this?  (Read 6363 times)

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WillyNilly

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #30 on: August 26, 2010, 11:20:51 AM »
Because I internet date I usually bring up the topic of exclusive dating in reference to the dating site.  Something along the lines of "I really enjoy spending time with you and would like to continue.  Can I ask - are you still actively on [site]?  I haven't logged on in a while since dating you and have been thinking about hiding my profile..." and see where the conversation goes from there.

With my last relationship I just kind of blurted out the word "boyfriend" in reference to something kind of random and we went from there.  I hadn't even realized I'd said it, but it led nicely into the "so whats our status?" conversation - it pretty much established the mindset I already was in.

kdbug

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #31 on: August 27, 2010, 06:52:03 PM »
I'm so glad I found this thread when I did. I have been seeing a guy for a while now and I was in the same boat as the OP. I took the advice offered on here and at one point last night I used the "You're neat. Can I keep you?" He just grinned and said "Well, I certainly hope so."

This led into the talk about if we were exclusive and we are.  ;)

sisbam

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #32 on: August 27, 2010, 07:14:01 PM »
I'm so glad I found this thread when I did. I have been seeing a guy for a while now and I was in the same boat as the OP. I took the advice offered on here and at one point last night I used the "You're neat. Can I keep you?" He just grinned and said "Well, I certainly hope so."

This led into the talk about if we were exclusive and we are.  ;)

And he cares about your cat, too, right? ;)

PeasNCues

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #33 on: August 27, 2010, 07:35:08 PM »
Well, I've decided to wait a little while before asking as we're in a good place right now where we are having a lot of fun and relaxed and I don't want to put strain or pressure on anything right now.

On the other hand, he's met the rabbits... and loves them. And they love him! Moose even sat next to them and Boy pet him for about half an hour and asked a lot of questions about them.

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Larrabee

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #34 on: August 27, 2010, 07:37:35 PM »
Well, I've decided to wait a little while before asking as we're in a good place right now where we are having a lot of fun and relaxed and I don't want to put strain or pressure on anything right now.

On the other hand, he's met the rabbits... and loves them. And they love him! Moose even sat next to them and Boy pet him for about half an hour and asked a lot of questions about them.

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

I've got a first date tomorrow, I'm already worrying about introductions to the rats  :P

Glad its going well for you!!  :)

Suze

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #35 on: August 27, 2010, 07:54:34 PM »
Well, I've decided to wait a little while before asking as we're in a good place right now where we are having a lot of fun and relaxed and I don't want to put strain or pressure on anything right now.

On the other hand, he's met the rabbits... and loves them. And they love him! Moose even sat next to them and Boy pet him for about half an hour and asked a lot of questions about them.

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

much better than the last one who didn't want them close to him -- right?
and Moose looks so  "Fooffy" and soft.
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flowersintheattic

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #36 on: August 28, 2010, 12:42:03 PM »
My current BF sent me a text (we were living in different cities at the time) that said "N (his friend's girlfriend) wants to know if you're my girlfriend. What should I tell her?" I found out later that she didn't actually ask, he just said she did to clarify our relationship;D
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high dudgeon

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #37 on: August 31, 2010, 01:57:30 PM »
I have to tell you, I'm not so sure asking is the way to go. Guys are weird. If you straight out ask then they feel like you kind of forced them into something. But if you don't ask them then you run the risk of them never bringing it up. 

Not all men are like that. There are guys who are like that, but if they can't handle a simple, honest conversation with laying all that baggage and nonsense on it, they aren't mature enough to have an adult relationship anyway.

Twik

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #38 on: August 31, 2010, 02:28:51 PM »
My dating days are well behind me, but does saying "I love you" come into this anywhere?
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Dindrane

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #39 on: August 31, 2010, 02:59:23 PM »
My d@ting days are well behind me, but does saying "I love you" come into this anywhere?

I doubt it.  I know that if I were still in the dating pool, I'd want to officially establish the relationship long before anyone had any idea about being in love.  Falling in love can take time, and being comfortable talking about it can take even longer, so it would be potentially disastrous to wait until both of those things happen before establishing the rules of the relationship.


ShieldMaiden

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #40 on: August 31, 2010, 03:06:31 PM »
I have to tell you, I'm not so sure asking is the way to go. Guys are weird. If you straight out ask then they feel like you kind of forced them into something. But if you don't ask them then you run the risk of them never bringing it up. 

Not all men are like that. There are guys who are like that, but if they can't handle a simple, honest conversation with laying all that baggage and nonsense on it, they aren't mature enough to have an adult rel@tionship anyway.

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I asked ShieldMan.  We had met online (MySpace...and completely random) and on our third date he was driving us to a restaurant and I said "I want to clarify something--are we just dating or do you consider me your girlfriend?"  He turned to me and said "You're my girlfriend, of course!" Case closed.   :-*

HeebyJeebyLeebee

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #41 on: August 31, 2010, 03:13:42 PM »
Well, I've decided to wait a little while before asking as we're in a good place right now where we are having a lot of fun and relaxed and I don't want to put strain or pressure on anything right now.

On the other hand, he's met the rabbits... and loves them. And they love him! Moose even sat next to them and Boy pet him for about half an hour and asked a lot of questions about them.

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Definitely a good sign
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kdbug

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Re: So... are we on the same page with this?
« Reply #42 on: August 31, 2010, 05:57:47 PM »
I'm so glad I found this thread when I did. I have been seeing a guy for a while now and I was in the same boat as the OP. I took the advice offered on here and at one point last night I used the "You're neat. Can I keep you?" He just grinned and said "Well, I certainly hope so."

This led into the talk about if we were exclusive and we are.  ;)

And he cares about your cat, too, right? ;)

He does indeed.  ;D It's pretty awesome.