Some of us still feel that showing up to a dinner/party with nothing in hand is rude or inconsidreate, if it's not a gift giving occasion.
Please excuse us, we don't mean anything by it, like your food is bad, etc., we just feel like we should contribute something, and are really honored that you chose to invite us.
Dang, sometimes trying to be considerate and polite really bites you in the bottom....lol
I can see always bringing something to a party - as long as it's clearly a host/ess gift (bottle of wine, flowers, box of chocolates, etc.). In that regard, I'm like you - and I'm sure most people here are - we wouldn't dream of showing up to a party without some sort of goody for the host/ess.
But I do find it incredibly
rude if someone showed up with, like, a side dish or something. And depending on the relationship
, it might (unintentionally, usually) come across as "we don't think you're capable of putting together a party, and we brought extra food to guarantee that there will be SOMETHING on the table."
And while it might be "that's how it's done in this group," I wonder if everyone is on board with it. Maybe years and years ago, Joe and Susie had a party and underestimated how much food to make, and everyone went home hungry. Three months later, they host another party, and everyone thinks "remember last time?" and brings their crockpot of beans/seven-layer salad/Jell-O, etc., so as to make sure there is enough food. And Joe and Susie are surprised, but think "well, ok, thanks." And now everyone in that group thinks "this is how things are done."