Author Topic: "Is there an etiquette question here?"  (Read 22985 times)

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T'Mar of Vulcan

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Re: "Is there an etiquette question here?"
« Reply #75 on: October 04, 2010, 12:46:53 AM »
I've been following this thread for awhile, and I've finally realised why this phrase bothers me.  It seems that the only time somebody says "Is there an etiquette question here?" is when they definitely think there isn't a question.  So it comes across a little PA.  If they were more direct and said "I'm not sure what your question is, could you clarify?" or "I don't think there's really an etiquette question here at all so I'm concerned this is just a rant" I don't think it would bother people as much.

BUT - and this was a point I made earlier (or in another thread?) there doesn't HAVE to be an etiquette question with every single post. Discussions can be held just fine without a "question and answer" dynamic. So what you suggest is fine IF the post is coming off as a rant. But if it's just someone posting about an etiquette-related situation without asking a question, that is fine too. And someone asking whether there is an etiquette question in that context is usually just being obnoxious. That's when I start feeling a bit stabby.


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Ceallach

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Re: "Is there an etiquette question here?"
« Reply #76 on: October 04, 2010, 02:00:52 AM »
I've been following this thread for awhile, and I've finally realised why this phrase bothers me.  It seems that the only time somebody says "Is there an etiquette question here?" is when they definitely think there isn't a question.  So it comes across a little PA.  If they were more direct and said "I'm not sure what your question is, could you clarify?" or "I don't think there's really an etiquette question here at all so I'm concerned this is just a rant" I don't think it would bother people as much.

BUT - and this was a point I made earlier (or in another thread?) there doesn't HAVE to be an etiquette question with every single post. Discussions can be held just fine without a "question and answer" dynamic. So what you suggest is fine IF the post is coming off as a rant. But if it's just someone posting about an etiquette-related situation without asking a question, that is fine too. And someone asking whether there is an etiquette question in that context is usually just being obnoxious. That's when I start feeling a bit stabby.

I absolutely agree about there not always needing to be a direct etiquette question - that's why I don't think we can make rules about these things. Every situation is unique.  I can't imagine there ever being a rule against asking this question (because it isn't really something to ban people for!) and realistically, there are always going to be some posters who phrase things in a way that upsets people from time to time. It's up to all of us to resolve those situations as pleasantly as possible.  Which I believe is what our mods are pointing out.  Even if everybody here agreed that the question is rude (which they don't appear to) I don't think that would change anything. We just have to deal as maturely as possible with situations as they arise arise.

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Wordgeek

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Re: "Is there an etiquette question here?"
« Reply #77 on: October 04, 2010, 02:28:28 AM »
Quote
We just have to deal as maturely as possible with situations as they arise.

Yes, exactly.  I'm a bit puzzled as to why this thread has gone on for so many pages.  If, in your judgment, a post or thread is "off", use the report violation button and add a note saying what you think the problem is.  The mods will act as necessary.

I don't know that there's anything else to add...