Former SiL sets a new record!

[IndianInlaw]

Former SIL  sent my 18 year old niece over to "borrow" $10 from my mom's husband, WHO IS NOT RELATED TO ANY OF THEM!

This just set him off.  He emptied out his wallet to show he only had $5...which, for some reason, he gave to her.  (He is far from indigent, though).

After he left,  he told my mother they had to move to get away from these people.  My mother couldn't tell me more, because she had to get back to her 76 year old husband, who was crying.

My gosh they are like the Borg.

[blue2000]

Ummm, may I suggest NOT answering the door, NOT letting them in the house, and NOT giving them anything, even a cup of coffee, a hello, whatever. Don't even keep money in any obvious place in the house, if possible.
They are obviously leeches who will suck you dry if you let them. If you (or your mom's hubby) don't give in, they may move on.

Of course, I'm not saying this would be easy. I've been in the situation of trying to repel a family member and they can be persistent little buggers, can't they?

[IndianInlaw]

Well, my mother let my nephew move in with her.   He stayed behind in Indiana when the family moved to  Maine and the landlady threw a fit when he (and his dog) moved in, so my mom took him in.

That's beginning to wear thin.

[blue2000]

Oh my! How old is your nephew?
If he was old enough to stay behind without the family, is he not old enough to get his own place? Would he be at all *willing* to do that? Or would he be expecting them to still support him if he moved?

I'm not too familiar with Borg habits, so I can't comment on the similarity. But they are starting to sound like a swarm of locusts - or vultures, lol!

[IndianInlaw]

He's 19.  He couldn't make it on his own.

He's a nice kid, but not that bright.  I'm not saying that to be mean, it's true.

He has yet to grasp the concept that landlords do not like big dogs.  Common among young people, don't ya think?

[kckgirl]

He's 19.  He couldn't make it on his own.

He's a nice kid, but not that bright.  I'm not saying that to be mean, it's true.

He has yet to grasp the concept that landlords do not like big dogs.  Common among young people, don't ya think?

Young people tend not to think about the consequences of their actions (getting a big dog) past the "Oh, isn't he cute?" stage. They don't understand why not everybody loves their pooch like they do, and I'm sure the dog would eat him out of house and home if he did have his own place. Does he at least pay for the dog's food at Grandma's house?

[IndianInlaw]

This is really sad..he couldn't afford to feed the dog and it was really skinny.  The first thing my mom did was buy it a bag of dog food.

He forgets to feed the poor thing...so you know who picks up the slack.


This family is such a drain.

[Gileswench]

Nephew sounds hideously immature and not very bright, but at nineteen he's old enough to learn a few lessons from the school of hard knocks.

The time has come for your mother and her husband to let these people know the free ride is officially over. nephew needs to be given a date by which he will make other living arrangements. It's not your mother's problem whether he moves back in with his own mother, finds room mates, or gives the dog to a responsible owner and finds a place by himself. If former SIL sends neice over for money, she needs to be told no.

Your mother and her husband cannot continue to be taken such gross advantage of if they refuse to allow themselves to be sucked dry by these leeches.

As horrible as their behavior is, your mother and her husband are enabling it. Like the old saying goes, if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem. They need to stand up and firmly be part of the solution by saying no.

[IndianInlaw]

They are the children of my late brother and my mother feels she would be letting him down, somehow.

My own cousin is awful, but my mother dotes on her because she is the child (49 years old) of my late aunt.

[kckgirl]

They are the children of my late brother and my mother feels she would be letting him down, somehow. My own cousin is awful, but my mother dotes on her because she is the child (49 years old) of my late aunt.

That's really sad. Just because your parent has passed away doesn't give you a free pass to behave badly. Your mother may need a reminder that inexcusable behavior should have consequences whether the parents are gone or still living. With no consequences, there is no need for the offenders to modify their behavior and they're encouraged to continue it. Mom would be doing her late son and sister a favor by insisting that the craziness stop, or that she be left out of it.

[LadyJaneinMD]

He's 19.  He couldn't make it on his own.

He's a nice kid, but not that bright.  I'm not saying that to be mean, it's true.

He has yet to grasp the concept that landlords do not like big dogs.  Common among young people, don't ya think?

Uh, excuse me?  I was 19 when I moved away from home,and *I* understood that landlords don't like big dogs!
I wasn't a particularly mature 19, but I did understand that.  I've seen some adult cluelessness that has me shaking my head and being fearful for the species, though.

[goblue2539]

Uh, excuse me?  I was 19 when I moved away from home,and *I* understood that landlords don't like big dogs!
I wasn't a particularly mature 19, but I did understand that.  I've seen some adult cluelessness that has me shaking my head and being fearful for the species, though.

You and me both.  I also moved out when I was 19, and I knew things like the bills would need to be paid and I'd have to get a job in my new city.  Go figure.