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  • February 20, 2017, 10:22:50 AM

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Author Topic: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.  (Read 609104 times)

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Writer of Wrongs

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2460 on: January 18, 2017, 08:05:19 AM »
Had a new one last night.

Note that my dad died about three months ago.

Last night DH and I were having dinner with Mom. The phone rang, and Mom answered. She's a bit hard of hearing, so she always uses the speakerphone. It went like this:

Mom: "Hello?"
Telemarketer: "Is (Dad's name) available?"
Me: dies laughing
Mom (also laughing, at me): "Well... not unless you can call Heaven."
Telemarketer: (startled pause - you could hear her face going white) "Oh, nooo! I'm so sorry. We'll correct our records. I'm sorry for your loss."
Call ends. We all crack up.

Nope, shouldn't have laughed. But my first thought was, "There's not a phone at the cemetery." And, well... laughter is healing, right?  ;)

Cor

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2461 on: February 07, 2017, 02:19:32 PM »
Baby was about three days old, happily breastfeeding when he choked on milk for the first time. As he is coughing, he gets this look on his face of utter betrayal--how could his food fight back like that?!?! DH and I lost it laughing at our poor sad little guy. When I went to continue feeding him, he refused to trust the same breast and had to switch sides.  DH then laughed so hard he almost passed out.

In other news...
My grandma's middle name was Janet. Apparently she hated it, so she pronoynced it Janette instead.  The preacher at the funeral was told this, and gives grandma's full name using the preferred pronunciation.  Grandma's SIL (grandpa was long deceased), regularly referred to as Crazy Aunt X, is sitting in the front row with us and she can't stand the "wrong" pronunciation.  She starts shouting out (in this pathetic little half shout, very indignantly) "Janet! Janet!  Janet!"  The preacher (who could clearly hear her, the service was at the funeral home) just kept going while the immediate family held back laughter. There was no silencing Crazy Aunt until she was good and ready to stop, so she kept going for a while!

Back at grandma's house for a booze-filled celebration of her life, I'm sitting on the couch when a three year old distant relative who was sitting beside me decides to get down.  Clearly needing a handle to assist him, he firmly grabs my breast, climbs down and wanders away. I turned beet red and everyone in the room dissolved into laughter.

Chipmunky

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2462 on: February 09, 2017, 08:16:19 AM »
Chipmunchkin is crawling, and trying to pull/push herself to a standing position.

Yesterday, I snapped some photos of her pushing off Mr. Chipmunky's leg (he was seated on the floor) in her efforts to stand up. 

Looking back at one of the photos, I'm cracking up. Chipmunchkin is pushing up, has feet under her, is just bent over with her hands on Mr. Chipmunky's leg. She's looking right at the tabby cat, Mopsy, with a determined look of "you are my kitty, and I will give you loves!"

Mopsy is looking back at me with an expression of "Oh no. Oh no no no no. This is way too much. This is too fast. Dang it, Hoomin Kitten is NOT supposed to be coming after me this rapidly! I'm totally screwed, aren't I?"

That one is definitely going in the baby album :P

Chez Miriam

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2463 on: February 09, 2017, 08:23:19 AM »
Chipmunchkin is crawling, and trying to pull/push herself to a standing position.

Yesterday, I snapped some photos of her pushing off Mr. Chipmunky's leg (he was seated on the floor) in her efforts to stand up. 

Looking back at one of the photos, I'm cracking up. Chipmunchkin is pushing up, has feet under her, is just bent over with her hands on Mr. Chipmunky's leg. She's looking right at the tabby cat, Mopsy, with a determined look of "you are my kitty, and I will give you loves!"

Mopsy is looking back at me with an expression of "Oh no. Oh no no no no. This is way too much. This is too fast. Dang it, Hoomin Kitten is NOT supposed to be coming after me this rapidly! I'm totally screwed, aren't I?"

That one is definitely going in the baby album :P

Whilst I feel (immensely) sorry for kitty, I'm chuckling at that image. ;D
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well."  - Julian of Norwich

jpcher

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2464 on: February 09, 2017, 04:33:45 PM »
Chipmunchkin is crawling, and trying to pull/push herself to a standing position.

Yesterday, I snapped some photos of her pushing off Mr. Chipmunky's leg (he was seated on the floor) in her efforts to stand up. 

Looking back at one of the photos, I'm cracking up. Chipmunchkin is pushing up, has feet under her, is just bent over with her hands on Mr. Chipmunky's leg. She's looking right at the tabby cat, Mopsy, with a determined look of "you are my kitty, and I will give you loves!"

Mopsy is looking back at me with an expression of "Oh no. Oh no no no no. This is way too much. This is too fast. Dang it, Hoomin Kitten is NOT supposed to be coming after me this rapidly! I'm totally screwed, aren't I?"

That one is definitely going in the baby album :P

Any chance you can post the photo? This sounds priceless! ;D

Chipmunky

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2465 on: February 10, 2017, 09:24:02 AM »

Any chance you can post the photo? This sounds priceless! ;D

I can't get the photo up right now, but will try to do so at some point in the next few days. I've also one of Chipmunchkin "stalking" Mopsy while Mopsy eats oblivious to the fact that she's being "hunted"  ;D ;D ;D

Chez Miriam

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2466 on: February 10, 2017, 09:34:42 AM »

Any chance you can post the photo? This sounds priceless! ;D

I can't get the photo up right now, but will try to do so at some point in the next few days. I've also one of Chipmunchkin "stalking" Mopsy while Mopsy eats oblivious to the fact that she's being "hunted"  ;D ;D ;D

Please may we have that one, too?  Hunter becoming hunted sounds hilarious when the stalker is a baby! ;D
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well."  - Julian of Norwich

Chipmunky

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2467 on: February 10, 2017, 12:40:21 PM »
Ask nicely, and ye shall receive, for at least a little while (I will poof these at some point).

ETA: Images don't want to load properly. Gaaargh! Will post when I figure it out...

wonderfullyanonymous

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2468 on: February 12, 2017, 02:58:27 PM »
My sister just had her puppy neutered, because of this he is wearing the cone of shame. She took a picture of her cat giving him kisses, and explained that the orange shoelace by his (the cats) feet, he brought to the puppy.

It's as if the cat is saying, I know what you are going through, and I'm really sorry, I hope this orange shoelace helps.

Chipmunky

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2469 on: February 16, 2017, 07:35:09 AM »
FINALLY!! The photos work!!!

And an update- last night, Chipmunchkin was crawling all over Mr. Chipmunky. She pushed herself to a similar almost standing position, then got herself upright.

She then released one hand. As we gaped in surprise, she wobbled.....

To catch herself, she planted a hand VERY firmly on Mr. Chipmunky. Right in the "no touch" zone.

While he curled up in momentary agony, I laughed hysterically, and received a slightly toothy grin from Chipmunchkin. ;D


*Photos poofed*
« Last Edit: February 17, 2017, 07:16:46 AM by Chipmunky »

Chez Miriam

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2470 on: February 16, 2017, 07:43:24 AM »
Those photos are so cute!  Thanks for posting them, Chipmunky.

That cat doesn't look as worried as it should... >:D
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well."  - Julian of Norwich

ladyknight1

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  • Not all those who wander are lost
Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2471 on: February 16, 2017, 07:45:03 AM »
Aww, you made my morning!
ďAll that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."
-J.R.R Tolkien

Chipmunky

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2472 on: February 16, 2017, 07:46:57 AM »
Those photos are so cute!  Thanks for posting them, Chipmunky.

That cat doesn't look as worried as it should... >:D

Miriam, that cat's normal expression is one of utter disdain for all others. For her, this expression is the equivalent of terrified  ;D ;D ;D

Chez Miriam

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Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #2473 on: February 16, 2017, 07:52:17 AM »
Those photos are so cute!  Thanks for posting them, Chipmunky.

That cat doesn't look as worried as it should... >:D

Miriam, that cat's normal expression is one of utter disdain for all others. For her, this expression is the equivalent of terrified  ;D ;D ;D

Typical that a cat can make 'terrified' look so laid back! ;D
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well."  - Julian of Norwich