Author Topic: Kids say the funniest things  (Read 216700 times)

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mmswm

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #690 on: March 03, 2013, 11:16:51 AM »
10 year old brother to 10 year old son:  "You need brake lights and turn signals on that thing!"

Said as son made a sudden stop and turn which made brother trip and fall into son's wheelchair.
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

rose red

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #691 on: March 03, 2013, 12:03:50 PM »
3 year old almost finish the entire long stick of hard candy.  Put the last bite down and said "I don't like it."

Sheila Take a Bow

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #692 on: March 03, 2013, 02:29:00 PM »
My 4-year-old daughter: "All this growing up is keeping me from doing the things that I like."

Softly Spoken

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #693 on: March 03, 2013, 09:37:36 PM »
My 4-year-old daughter: "All this growing up is keeping me from doing the things that I like."

I think we all find ourselves saying this, if only to ourselves, at least once a year...every year of our lives. ::)

Sheila your daughter is wise. ;D
"... for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so."
-William Shakespeare

"We find comfort among those who agree with us - growth among those who don't."  ~Frank A. Clark

MommyPenguin

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #694 on: March 03, 2013, 10:25:55 PM »
My 2.5-year-old is going through a stage that all of my kids have gone through, so far, in which she gets freaked out at any little bits of dirt or fuzz in the bathtub.  Like the lint that sometimes gets stuck to their toes when they take their socks off.  So she was upset and crying, telling me, "There's a bug in the bath!"

Me: "It's not a bug.  It's just fuzz.  Like from your socks."

Charlotte: "There's a sock in the bath!"

Me: <sigh>

MonteCristo

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #695 on: March 04, 2013, 12:04:40 PM »
My baby sister got one of those little kiddie computers as a present when she was about 5 years old.  Now, she had been playing on a regular computer since she was an infant, so she's pretty familiar with it.  She came running up to me with the little computer and said, "look at this ridiculous computer, they didn't even put the keys in the right place." I tried to explain to her that they put them in alphabetical order, but she insisted that the person who made the computer must not have ever seen a computer in his life or he would know the proper way to put the keys.  She complained for about a week that nobody could write anything on it with the keys all mixed up.  :)

twiggy

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #696 on: March 04, 2013, 07:05:26 PM »
My 4 year old just hollered from the bathroom: " I found two dollars!"
I shouted back that those are my dollars, and leave them alone.
 He singsonged back "finder keepers, losers sleepers"
In the United States today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children.  The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted.  The result is unruly children and childish adults.  ~Thomas Szasz

Piratelvr1121

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #697 on: March 04, 2013, 07:18:07 PM »
The 3 boys were outside and the littlest one tripped and got a minor scratch on his forehead, which led to Pirateboy2 starting to fuss over him. 

PB2: I think I saw a crater!!
Me: There's no crater, tis but a scratch!
PB2: But what if all the things that's happened to him (minor typical toddler bonks on the noggin from tripping) he ends up...you know!
Me: Let me put it this way.  You had just as many bonks on the noggin at his age and look at you now!
PB2: Oh no, poor Piratebabe!
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

mmswm

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #698 on: March 04, 2013, 09:11:41 PM »
My father took all the boys and went way out in the back part of the property for a campfire tonight.  I hiked out there to check on them and make sure Dad didn't need anything.  I asked how things were going and Dad told me they were doing one of those chain stories and were having quite the good time.  My 10 year old brother pipes up, "but he won't let us use nuclear weapons!".

Oh, dear.
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

Piratelvr1121

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #699 on: March 04, 2013, 11:32:29 PM »
Don't think I've shared this one before. BG: Late great-uncle was a Catholic priest and so at times he would say mass in my grandparent's living room.   In the Catholic church, children do not take the Eucharist until they've had their first communion, usually at age 8 (2nd grade)

Well once when my youngest uncle was about 3 or 4, Uncle W was giving out the Eucharist and Uncle Bud kept following him around, tugging on his cassock saying "Uncle W, Uncle W, you forgot me!"
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

Piratelvr1121

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #700 on: March 05, 2013, 08:03:56 PM »
Today for lunch I made a tasty tuna and cheese sandwich from a recipe I found on Pinterest that, instead of using mayo, uses Greek yogurt with a bit of Worcestershire sauce.  VERY good.

Well the Pirate babe had finished his lunch but since apparently he has a bottomless stomach, he came over to the trunk we use as a coffee table and leaned on his elbows, his chin resting on his little fist and big blue eyes fixed on my sandwich.  He straightened up and giggled (he knows he's cute) then bent over again and this time rested his chin on both fists, smiling at my sandwich. 

He kept doing that until I finally let him have a bit of it.  He loved it, to judge by he was devouring it but when I asked him "Do you like it?" he was shaking his head.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

violinp

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #701 on: March 05, 2013, 11:36:49 PM »
Today for lunch I made a tasty tuna and cheese sandwich from a recipe I found on Pinterest that, instead of using mayo, uses Greek yogurt with a bit of Worcestershire sauce.  VERY good.

Well the Pirate babe had finished his lunch but since apparently he has a bottomless stomach, he came over to the trunk we use as a coffee table and leaned on his elbows, his chin resting on his little fist and big blue eyes fixed on my sandwich.  He straightened up and giggled (he knows he's cute) then bent over again and this time rested his chin on both fists, smiling at my sandwich. 

He kept doing that until I finally let him have a bit of it.  He loved it, to judge by he was devouring it but when I asked him "Do you like it?" he was shaking his head.

Such a charmer!  ;D
"It takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies, but even more to stand up to your friends" - Harry Potter


pwv

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #702 on: March 18, 2013, 03:14:11 PM »
My niece's husband had to go out of town last week and she asked me to spend the week with her (I live several hours away) and take her kids to preschool and pick them up.  In between I could do whatever.  Her DH came home Thursday evening and after dinner I had the following conversation with her 4yo.

DD - pwv are you going to grandma's house now?
me - no, I'm going tomorrow
DD - well, daddy's home now, so you can go tonight, we don't need you anymore.

CakeBeret

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #703 on: March 18, 2013, 03:49:15 PM »
I took my son out for his birthday yesterday. He turned 3 and I wanted to do something special just the two of us. Unfortunately he was in a really odd mood and was not really pleased with anything. The restaurant gave him a free ice cream sundae, at which point he told me "I don't want it to be my birthday because I don't want ice cream."

Well, dang. What kid not only does not want it to be their birthday, but does not want ice cream either?

(He also later told me he was not having fun and did not want a birthday surprise. I really do not understand small children. At all.)
"From a procrastination standpoint, today has been wildly successful."

mmswm

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #704 on: March 18, 2013, 04:51:21 PM »
Some people just don't like ice cream.  My middle child once pouted because ice cream was the dessert of choice for birthdays when what he really wanted was strawberry cheesecake.  I can't remember if that was his 5th or 6th birthday, but I do know we wound up going to the Cheesecake Factory that night.

I hope your son is in a better mood today, and happy late birthday to him!
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)