Kids say the funniest things

[wonderfullyanonymous]

My 18 month old granddaughter was doing something I didn't want her to be doing. I gave her an angry face and said "Ava, you need to stop that right now."

he looks at me for a second, and then you could see that she was thinking on how to get out of this trouble. Her eyes got a teeny gleam in them and she gives me the cutest and biggest smile.

It was all I could do to not laugh.

[Piratelvr1121]

LOL!!! They know they're cute, don't they?

I remembered one just now that's funny.   My father has a twin brother who married a woman who is very similar in looks to my mother but they are not related other than being SILs.  When my cousin was about 5 and figuring out what it meant to be twins, he said "Mommy, daddy and uncle are twins, right, and that means they came out of Grandma's tummy at the same time."  My aunt confirmed this and he thought for a moment.

Then he said "Well then whose tummy did you and aunt come out of?"

[Jules1980]

When BabyB was just a few days old, BabyJ was having a very bad day that finally culminated in a meltdown.  We had to call in grandma for re-enforcement.  Finally, after she was somewhat calmed down, she turned to her Grandma and said, "I'm really upset that BabyB didn't come out a four years old.  I really wanted him to be able to play."  Then back into meltdown mode.  This probably wouldn't have been so funny if not for the fact that everyone had been telling her for months that he wasn't going to come ready to play.  She just thought if she believed it hard enough, we would be wrong.

[blueyzca01]

My grandmother used to love to tell on one of my cousins, who would greet her when she visited with a big, bright, "HI, Grammie! When you goin' home?"

Of course, what she meant was "How long are we going to have the pleasure of your company?" Her version was just more efficient syllable-wise -- if less tactful. 
[/quote]

Wow, I did the same thing!  My standard greeting for my mom's sisters (she has 7) was, "Hi Aunt whoever!!  I'm so happy to see you.  Now, when are you leaving?"

Thank diety a couple of them finally told Mom what I was saying...they were getting their feelings hurt.  Fortunately, Mom was able to explain that I was just mentally mapping out and planning the time I had left with each one.

[Piratelvr1121]

I remember asking my grandparents when they were leaving, but was hoping it wouldn't be for a while, as I adored them.

[ladyknight1]

When my husband was small, he visited his grandparents very often. When he was 5, he was staying with them for an extended period and his grandfather was making lunch. DH saw his grandpa take a can out of the cabinet, then use the can opener to open it.

DH could smell fish, and he told his grandpa, "Can't eat cat food, grandpa, gotta eat meat!"

DH is in his 40's and that is still a favorite reminder his aunts and uncles love to tease him with.

[Coralreef]

DS was about 3 at the time.  My brother's name is Donald.  I was talking to brother on the phone and he asked to speak to DS.  I hand the phone over and there is a short conversation, but my son was elated. He just talked to Mr.McDonald, of fast food chain fame. 

DD was about 4.  She wanted to go to a favourite restaurant of ours, but couldn't remember the name.  She described it as "the chicken with the red hair", as per their logo.  Clear enough and the name stuck, this is what the whole family calls that restaurant for the last 20 years.

[Doll Fiend]

Don't have any children but have had many laughs from this thread! Thank you all for sharing!

[CrochetFanatic]

Picture it: a family with two children under the age of three, and four very gassy dogs.  One of the last times we visited, my mom waved a hand in front of her nose and said, "Man, those dogs stink..."  The two-year-old got a wicked grin on her face, and said, "Gotcha!  It wasn't the dogs!~"  Which was followed by her turning her back and wiggling her butt. 

[Tierrainney]

My youngest just announced after rolling a ball past the cat:

"and the cat was like, done that, been there."

[pwv]

This happened a number of years ago when my oldest niece was about 4 years old.

When I got to their house for Easter dinner, she ran in and gave me a hug, then ran into the dining room, returning with an Easter basket.  She sat down with me and showed me the egg she had decorated for me.  She showed me the jelly beans that were under the grass and pointed out that I had *two* chocolate marshmallow bunnies.  She then looked at me and said "Now remember pwv, you have to share."

From the other room I heard her mother say "no DD, pwv does not have to share."  She had apparently eaten both her bunnies and tried to get to her younger sister's bunnies as well;  but she just knew that I would let her have mine.

[crella]

You reminded me of my niece when we went out to buy chocolate. There was a shop a couple of towns over that my mother liked, so we all piled in the car and went. B bought dark chocolate turtles with her allowance, and I bought all milk chocolate. B thinks everyone should love dark chocolate (my buying milk prompted a 'But, why?'). As we were sampling our treats, she said , Aunty, would you like to try my dark chocolate? You should!' 'Well ok, then...' 'Okay, then, here, lick these fingers!'  I thought my Dad would drive up a tree!

[twiggy]

A good friend of mine just had a baby girl a few weeks ago. Her next youngest is 6, and she was talking to him about the new baby and where the new baby will sleep, and how the baby was in her stomach, but she would go to the hospital and Baby would be born, then come home. After several such conversations, her 6yo had an epiphany and one day exclaimed: "you mean the Baby is going to come out NAKED!" Totally scandalized

[mmswm]

Twiggy, your story reminded me of a funny new baby story.

I have difficult pregnancies and early deliveries.  When my oldest was 2, I had my second child, who spent several weeks in NICU.  The following year I had my youngest, who spent 6 months in the NICU.  Finally, the wonderful day came and I was able to bring my third child home.  I was sitting on the couch with the baby and the older two were trying to compete for who got to "hold" the baby.  Oldest son pushed middle son out of the way and said "This is MY baby.  If you want one, mom will have to go to the hospital and get you another one!"

I'm assuming because I didn't have normal pregnancies and was back and forth to the hospital before I delivered (hospitalized bedrest) and then had to go back and forth after they were born to visit in NICU, oldest didn't realize the whole "baby in mommy's tummy" thing and thought a hospital was a place where you could go shop for babies.

[Redwing]

My husband, daughter, and I were watching Househunters the other night and they were in Miami.  My granddaughter was playing nearby and my husband made a comment about living in Miami. My granddaughter said to me, "Grandma, do you want to live in Grandpa's Ami?"

It took a minute.