A Civil World. Off-topic discussions on a variety of topics. > Humor Me!

Kids say the funniest things

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Dazi:

--- Quote from: violinp on July 21, 2013, 03:18:23 PM ---
--- Quote from: mmswm on July 21, 2013, 12:49:24 PM ---
--- Quote from: twiggy on July 21, 2013, 01:36:10 AM ---he's on a tear this week. Two days ago he came up and asked me "Mom, do you remember the table in the playroom that used to be brown?" Ummmm, what do you mean used to be? "Well, I just got the spray paint ( :o) and now it's red. Do you want to see?" In the process he also got the puppy. So both of the boy puppies have spots, but only one is natural ::) Later I caught DS under the table with a sponge and the puppy trying the scrub the paint out of his coat.

I honestly don't know what I'm going to do with this child. He also dumped most of a bottle of bubble bath on his sister's head because he "couldn't do it on [his] head because [he] would get soap in [his] eyes and that burns!"

--- End quote ---

Are you sure we're not related?  I could tell dozens of similar stories about my middle son.  The other two are pretty typical boys, but the middle one is just flat out crazy.  He'll try anything once.  Sometimes more than once.  He's the one I had to rescue off the roof of the house when he was 2.  It just got worse from there.

--- End quote ---

My dad at age 3 believed that a blanket tied around his neck made him Mighty Mouse, and that he could actually fly off the roof. Imagine his great surprise when he fell all the way down the sloped driveway.  :o He was lucky he was only bruised and scraped badly.

--- End quote ---

An old friend of mine did something similar, but he thought he was Superman, jumped off a balcony and landed in a rose bush.

Outdoor Girl:
The other day on the radio, they had parents phoning in, telling about things their children had said that embarrassed them.

I live in an area that is not very ethnically diverse.  Those in the area of other than European descent are few and far between.

One lady phoned in and was talking about her son when he was about 6.  She had taught him that people are people and that it doesn't matter what they look like.  So one day, he saw a black woman and walked up to her and said, 'You have a great tan!'.  The woman calling in said she was just about ready to fall through the floor when the other woman smiled and said, 'Thanks!  You have a good tan, too.'

Hollanda:
Ha. Mine has literally just started talking and already cracks us up laughing.


My knees crack when I kneel. It sounds alarming but not painful. DS last night pointed as I knelt and my knees let out a huge CRAAACK. He said "ow!" His little eyebrows were furrowed in confusion. I said "Yes, that's Mummy's knees." He said "Knees. Ow!" I asked him where his knees are. He pointed, knelt and said "Knees. No ow." He actually looked disappointed with the fact his knees don't sound like a machine gun fire every time he sits, kneels or stands.


What was mortifying was that this afternoon when we went to the shop he said "Mumma's knee. Ow!"


So now everyone knows my knees crack. Great!!  ;D 

Piratelvr1121:
I grilled up some chicken tonight with some sun dried tomato dressing marinade and my middle child told me "You sent my tastebuds on an adventure!" :)

Hollanda:

--- Quote from: Piratelvr1121 on July 30, 2013, 07:39:16 PM ---I grilled up some chicken tonight with some sun dried tomato dressing marinade and my middle child told me "You sent my tastebuds on an adventure!" :)

--- End quote ---

A good or bad one?

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