Kids say the funniest things

[Bexx27]

This morning DD (22 months) saw me stub my toe and yell "ow ow ow, my toe!" She immediately ran up to DH and started crying, holding out her foot and saying, "toe! toe!" I don't know whether to be pleased that she's showing empathy or miffed that she's making my pain all about her. 

[Nora]

Found myself singing "Du kan ikke alltid fĺ det du řnsker deg" (had to mangle it on the fly) on the bus today. Kid wanted pancakes for dinner. Wasn't happening.

[Amber]

I am six months pregnant right now.  My four year old told me that I need to lose some pounds. I just giggled and told her that when the baby is born I will lose some weight. 

[#1aunt]

A couple of years ago my BF was talking to my then-4-year-old niece at her brother's birthday party.

BF: I heard you have a birthday coming up soon.
Niece: Yep.
BF:  When is your birthday?
Niece: Umm...When I turn 5.
BF: And when do you 5?
Niece: On my birthday!

[kajunchick]

Last night my mom was telling the kids a story about a boa constrictor. It goes, "Oh no, it's up to my toe, Oh my, it's up to my thigh, etc.

My 4YO niece, Sarah, says, "I know a story about a bear. Oh my, he's riding by bike. Oh no, he's eating my family."

[Maujer]

Last night my mom was telling the kids a story about a boa constrictor. It goes, "Oh no, it's up to my toe, Oh my, it's up to my thigh, etc.

My 4YO niece, Sarah, says, "I know a story about a bear. Oh my, he's riding by bike. Oh no, he's eating my family."

This made me laugh out loud at work. Amazing.

[faithlessone]

Just remembered one!

I was baby-sitting my cousins (Tilly - 2 and Tabby - 5) a few weeks ago. It was a couple of days after the Royal Wedding (Prince William and Kate Middleton). Tabby is at primary school, and they had had a big party to celebrate.

Tabby found a white lacy table-cloth, and was parading round the living-room with it over her head (veil-style), forcing Tilly to hold the other end.

"I'm a bride," she said. "Like the princess."

I asked her who she was marrying.

She tipped her head to one side, considered the question for a long while, and then said, "Anyone who'll have me."

I had to leave the room before I totally cracked up!

[Íkorna]

Last night my mom was telling the kids a story about a boa constrictor. It goes, "Oh no, it's up to my toe, Oh my, it's up to my thigh, etc.

My 4YO niece, Sarah, says, "I know a story about a bear. Oh my, he's riding by bike. Oh no, he's eating my family."

This made me laugh out loud at work. Amazing.

I laughed out loud as well! That's hilarious.

[Pinky830]

8 year old daughter was playing with the compass app on DH's phone, spinning it rapidly around and around.

DH: "Ellen! Stop! You'll mess up the polarity of the earth!"

Ellen, dead serious: "Oh, sorry."

[norrina]

DBF's 10 y.o. son and I were at the beach the other day when a wedding took place. This apparently puts kiddo in the frame of mind of thinking of weddings and wedding-related matters, because he suddenly ponders, "You know where the perfect place to propose would be?" Then he stops, tells me, "I'm not going to tell you Norrina!" and proceeds to go whisper in his dad's ear.

[bookworm317]

DBF's 10 y.o. son and I were at the beach the other day when a wedding took place. This apparently puts kiddo in the frame of mind of thinking of weddings and wedding-related matters, because he suddenly ponders, "You know where the perfect place to propose would be?" Then he stops, tells me, "I'm not going to tell you Norrina!" and proceeds to go whisper in his dad's ear.

Get your DBF to spill the beans. We, your fellow e-hellions, MUST know!

[norrina]

DBF's 10 y.o. son and I were at the beach the other day when a wedding took place. This apparently puts kiddo in the frame of mind of thinking of weddings and wedding-related matters, because he suddenly ponders, "You know where the perfect place to propose would be?" Then he stops, tells me, "I'm not going to tell you Norrina!" and proceeds to go whisper in his dad's ear.

Get your DBF to spill the beans. We, your fellow e-hellions, MUST know!

I have an idea that if kiddo's perfect proposal location is feasible DBF will actually use the idea when the time comes. So my guess is he isn't going to tell me. ;-)

Edit/Update: I went ahead and asked DBF just in case he would say. The perfect proposal in the mind of a 10 y.o. boy occurs whilst descending during a skydive. If DBF could convince me to go skydiving with him in the first place, I'm pretty sure I would be too preoccupied with trying not to soil myself to register a marriage proposal, let alone respond to it. 

[MizB]

Thats too funny Norrina.

[kajunchick]

Another one from my niece: she walked into our yard holding candy. My DD asked, "Are you got three of them?" (to share) and Niece replied, "DO you got three of them!" 

[Animala]

Today my son, 13, informed me that he needs a Twitter account so he can twit.  He was completely serious.  I think I deserve extra good mommy points for not laugh and no he isn't going to be on Twitter.