Kids say the funniest things

[Wonderflonium]

I stopped by my best friend's parents' house on Thanksgiving to visit. Her 6-year-old son was super excited to see me and I got lots of hugs. Then he shouted to his mother in another room, "Mom, your friend is here!" I don't know why, but it cracked me up. I gave him a look, and he followed it with, "It's Wonderflonium!"

[kajunchick]

From my friend's facebook page (she teaches kindergarten):

"Got a new Christmas CD for my little ones(it's actually one for kids lol) I knew it was time for me to play a new kid friendly one when one of my students said "Mrs. Jessica that song is scary" lol- I guess Johnny Cash Christmas CD is not for everyone!"

[kethria]

Muffin is learning to talk and she has quite the sense of humor, which was a little surprising considering her age. So my mother and I asked her "Muffin are you Mommy's baby?" "No... giggle giggle" "Are you Moga's Baby?" "No... giggle" "whose baby are you?" "Dada"

"Muffin who do you love?" "Dada! Dog! Mama! Rock!" So I rank under the dog but above the rocks. Yay!

[Wonderflonium]

Muffin is learning to talk and she has quite the sense of humor, which was a little surprising considering her age. So my mother and I asked her "Muffin are you Mommy's baby?" "No... giggle giggle" "Are you Moga's Baby?" "No... giggle" "whose baby are you?" "Dada"

"Muffin who do you love?" "Dada! Dog! Mama! Rock!" So I rank under the dog but above the rocks. Yay!

*LMBO* That made my morning.

[deadbody]

Muffin is learning to talk and she has quite the sense of humor, which was a little surprising considering her age. So my mother and I asked her "Muffin are you Mommy's baby?" "No... giggle giggle" "Are you Moga's Baby?" "No... giggle" "whose baby are you?" "Dada"

"Muffin who do you love?" "Dada! Dog! Mama! Rock!" So I rank under the dog but above the rocks. Yay!

You're on the right side of the ground at least. 

[faithlessone]

This evening, I was at my grandparents' house with my cousins. Every year, a local charity does a thing where they have a Father Christmas on a float who comes round the streets, collecting money and handing out sweets to the kids.

I went outside to see it, with my cousins Amy (14), Tabby (5) and Tilly (3). While we were waiting, Tabby was bouncing around, talking about what she was going to ask for. Amy and I asked Tilly what she was going to ask for.

"Vanilla," she said. "With choco flake!"

She thought Father Christmas was the icecream man!!!!

[White Dragon]

My nephew is 12 and we only get to see him about once a year.
Every time I see him, I'm reminded what a great dry wit he has.

Yesterday, we left home at 8:30 am to drive to visit my family.
We arrived at 11:30 pm (local), or 12:30 am for us.
We were...very tired.

In spite of all that, the family - and nephew who was visiting - were up to meet us. It was really nice.

As we got settled, my Dad asked us what our plans for the next day were. He knew we planned on a ski trip at some point in our stay and wanted to know just so that he could make sure breakfast was available if we were heading out early.

I looked at the time - now 1:30 am on my internal clock - and mentally shuddered at the prospect of getting up at 7am to go skiing.
I tried to tactfully say we weren't up to it and said "Well, we certainly could accomplish it if we needed to..."

And nephew chirped "But we just don't want to!"

Maybe it was just being really tired, but at the time, it was just really, really funny!

[baglady]

Must share this story that Bagman told on his granddaughter (who is 20 months) when he visited over Christmas:

BG: This is the fourth time they have seen each other in person since her first birthday in April.

He arrives and says, "Hi, (GD's Name)! Do you remember me?"
GD: "Gramma!"
BM: "No, I'm GrandPA!" He says "Pa!" a couple more times, they make a little game of it (BM: "Pa!" GD: "Pa!"), and it appears she's finally nailed that he's Grandpa.

Next morning:

BM: "Hi, (GD's Name)! Remember who I am?"
GD: "Gramma!"

[kherbert05]

I was at physical therapy on Thursday and a little boy about 8 or 9 came in for his session.  He was talking to his therapist: "Did you know that back in the 1900's they wouldn't let girls be scientists or doctors or stuff like that?  Why were they so stupid?  There's no reason girls can't be scientists!"

WE'RE WINNING!

A story my parents like to tell on occasion.  When I was about 3 I got hit in the face with a pipe, enough to leave a scar, however no stitches were needed.  I was taken to the ER, and refused to let the doctor look at me.  Despite all the promises from everyone that yes he was a doctor, I was sure he wasn't because the only doctor I knew was my parents female friend, so in my mind all doctors were women. 

I've since found that the majority of women doctors I see have far better bedside manner than the male doctors.

Mom was a chemist involved in the first kidney transplants at Baylor College of Medicine Houston. I have a bunch of adopted aunts who are scientists.


 Apparently I regularly informed the misinformed that most scientists were women (All the ones I knew were), and they and the nurses bossed the doctors around. I explained to several teachers, the scientists figure out how to make people better then the doctors follow their instructions. When the doctors don't follow the instructions the nurses yell at them.


The teachers got the 1st part (that was kid logic and not understanding about PHds) , but were puzzled by the 2nd part. They asked Mom about it and Mom clicked on how many times an ER nurse had stopped the doctors from giving me a common OTC allergy med  that sends me into orbit around Pluto.

[Slartibartfast]

I was at physical therapy on Thursday and a little boy about 8 or 9 came in for his session.  He was talking to his therapist: "Did you know that back in the 1900's they wouldn't let girls be scientists or doctors or stuff like that?  Why were they so stupid?  There's no reason girls can't be scientists!"

WE'RE WINNING!

A story my parents like to tell on occasion.  When I was about 3 I got hit in the face with a pipe, enough to leave a scar, however no stitches were needed.  I was taken to the ER, and refused to let the doctor look at me.  Despite all the promises from everyone that yes he was a doctor, I was sure he wasn't because the only doctor I knew was my parents female friend, so in my mind all doctors were women. 

I've since found that the majority of women doctors I see have far better bedside manner than the male doctors.

Mom was a chemist involved in the first kidney transplants at Baylor College of Medicine Houston. I have a bunch of adopted aunts who are scientists.


 Apparently I regularly informed the misinformed that most scientists were women (All the ones I knew were), and they and the nurses bossed the doctors around. I explained to several teachers, the scientists figure out how to make people better then the doctors follow their instructions. When the doctors don't follow the instructions the nurses yell at them.


The teachers got the 1st part (that was kid logic and not understanding about PHds) , but were puzzled by the 2nd part. They asked Mom about it and Mom clicked on how many times an ER nurse had stopped the doctors from giving me a common OTC allergy med  that sends me into orbit around Pluto.

A (female) friend of mine was in the military until very recently.  She also has two stepsons, mid-elementary age.  Apparently someone asked the younger one if he wanted to go into the army someday, and he told them "Ewwww!  The army is for GIRLS!"

[MummySweet]

Two for you:

A few days before the holiday break my five year old stayed home from school sick.   She entertained herself by looking at photographs on our screen saver.  While looking at a picture of one of her brothers she asked who the other person in the picture was. When I replied that it was me, she responded, "But she looks so young! That can't be you."   

Awhile back I asked my seven year old what he wanted on his sandwich.   He replied, "Jam, straight up."   I was left wondering who he has been hanging out with?    I guess I should be happy he didn't ask for a double!   

[Silversurfer]

Bwahahaha! ' apple juice, on the rocks!'

[Slartibartfast]

Babybartfast got up WAY too early this morning, but DH and I didn't want to get up yet.  She tried to climb in bed with us, which would have been fine, but she couldn't hold still so DH removed her and told her to go play in the living room.  I was still pretty groggy at that point as she was climbing on me, so I didn't really pay attention until she suddenly appeared in the bedroom doorway and announced, "Mommy, I put a banana under your pillow!"

I reached one hand under there and - yep, sure enough, there were two bananas under my pillow and one under DH's!

"Babybartfast, why did you put a banana under my pillow?"

"I put a banana under your pillow so when the fairy comes she'll have something to eat!"

No idea where she's been hearing about the tooth fairy - she's only 3 1/2, nowhere near old enough to be losing teeth yet - but DH tried to give her a semi-coherent explanation about why bananas are not bedtime toys.

[White Dragon]

DD is 17 and in Grade 12. As she approaches graduation, she's starting to plan for the future.
She is starting to think about what items she needs for college and what parts of her life will be left behind.
Today's conversation concerned her extensive - and still growing - collection of stuffed animals.

DD "I'll give most of them up -they're really just an indulgence."

Me - knowing how attached she is to them, and thinking to start things gently - "Why don't you start now? Just a half dozen or so?"

DD, in genuine horror "I can,t do that! They all have names and I can't break up couples! Rouge and Windrider are married and have a kid! I can't break up families!!"
 

Somehow, I think we still have a long way to go.

[Slartibartfast]

This is what your parents' house is for - to store all the stuff you can't take with you to college, but you're not really ready to give away yet