Kids say the funniest things

[hobish]

My 6-year-old DD has been playing Stupid Zombies on the Kindle.  So now she's squealing, "The dead bats are SOOOO cute!"

I love that game.

While searching for something non-mind-numbing to watch with Babybartfast (age 4) today, I stumbled across the Avengers cartoon on Netflix.  She's watching quietly, absorbing the story, then announces "Look mom!  He [Iron Man] has BREASTS!"

Yeah, his costume in the cartoon does have pretty clearly defined pectorals, but everything Babybartfast knows about breasts she learned from me feeding Bittybartfast, so . . .

DD got to milk a cow when we were visiting a farm recently and was a bit reluctant until she was told the udder was the cow's boobies. Now she tells everyone she got to milk the cow's boobies 

I used to work at a 4H camp way back when. Some of the inner city kids really never put together that's where milk comes from. Watching them freak out over cow boobies remains one of the most enjoyable experiences of my life. I can't help but smile just thinking about it.

[Piratelvr1121]

I love watching Ellen, and even DVR it, and as a result my kids and DH love her show too, but the two oldest have been after me for weeks "Mom record this funny thing we're doing and maybe we'll get to be on Ellen!"  "Send this joke to Ellen for Classic Joke Tuesday!" "I just saw a sign, send it to Ellen!" "Tell Ellen I want to meet her, and Sophia Grace and Rosie, too!"

After they were taught to play spades and allowed to join in on the traditional holiday game on Thanksgiving, Pirateboy1 has been obsessed with playing spades...and then he found out Ellen has playing cards in her store.  Guess what he wants now?

Funny thing is, Pirateboy2 has started teasing him for having a crush on Ellen by singing the "K-I-S-S-I-N-G" song.  I said "Um, you remember Ellen is married right? To a woman? Not to mention she's in her 50's, even if she doesn't look it." "Pirateboy1 and Ellen, sitting in a tree! H-U-G-G-I-N-G!"

[Slartibartfast]

Relayed to me by my MIL today:

She and Babybartfast were playing at her house with Babybartfast's little plastic cash register, pretending to shop for groceries for Babybartfast's baby doll.  MIL put a toy milk carton in the basket, but Babybartfast corrected her: "No, Grandma, babies can't have milk!  They can only have milk from breasts!  [pause]  You can pretend you have breasts if you want, though."

(MIL is about my height but I have 20 pounds and about three cup sizes on her . . .)

[CrochetFanatic]

I just remembered a cute story my dad told us last year.  He's really tall, a little on the heavy side, and has a beard with a lot more salt than pepper.  In retrospect, it was oh-so-obvious...

Anyway, for whatever reason, we had an extra turkey last year, and he was dropping it off at a friend's house just days before Thanksgiving.  As he was leaving, one of the neighbor's little girls, who must have been about four years old, started grinning and waving to him.  "Santa?!  Hi, Santa!  Hi, Santa!"  My dad grinned and waved back before getting into his car and driving off.  He loves to tell that story. 

[CakeEater]

I just remembered a cute story my dad told us last year.  He's really tall, a little on the heavy side, and has a beard with a lot more salt than pepper.  In retrospect, it was oh-so-obvious...

Anyway, for whatever reason, we had an extra turkey last year, and he was dropping it off at a friend's house just days before Thanksgiving.  As he was leaving, one of the neighbor's little girls, who must have been about four years old, started grinning and waving to him.  "Santa?!  Hi, Santa!  Hi, Santa!"  My dad grinned and waved back before getting into his car and driving off.  He loves to tell that story. 

Super cute!

My little one was sitting in church  this week, and must have noticed the enormous cross hanging from the ceiling at the front. She gestures with her finger and says, "Down and across - it's a 't'!"

She hasn't quite grasped all the particulars of our religion, yet. 

[pwv]

The kid was only 7 months old and not talking yet so she didn't actually *say* anything, but...

I was holding my niece and had to sneeze, so I turned away and sneezed rather loudly several times.  When I turned back to her, she was staring at me with a startled wide-eyed deer-in-headlights expression on her face, as if she was saying  "What the e-hell was that?"

[Piratelvr1121]

That reminds me of a really cute video on youtube where a baby boy gets a very startled look on his face when his mama blows her nose, then he giggles.  You can tell she's doing it for fun after the first time but it's hysterical to see the boy "jump" back (he's in his walker) and then giggle.

[blue2000]

Aww. Reminds me of when I was little, and one of my uncles used to blow his nose to entertain the kids (he made quite an impressive honking noise!).

[Jones]

My son Boo refuses to speak. Occasionally I get a word, but he gets mad if we try to make him talk. Everyone said Just give him time.
Recently Boo had to have minor surgery  He woke up after, slow and groggy. A bright young orderly was chattering away to him. He looked her in the eye and said "Who you?" She gave her name, which is the same as a family member's, and Boo shook his head with a "No." It was awesome to see him speak like that!
He's gone back to his mostly nonspeaking self. Guess it was the drugs talking 

[Layla Miller]

That reminds me of a really cute video on youtube where a baby boy gets a very startled look on his face when his mama blows her nose, then he giggles.  You can tell she's doing it for fun after the first time but it's hysterical to see the boy "jump" back (he's in his walker) and then giggle.

LOL!  My almost 4-month-old was on her tummy on the floor the other day, while the cat was facing her a few feet away.  The cat started sneezing repeatedly, while DD just stared at him with an entranced grin on her face.  Apparently cat sneezes are the most entertaining thing on the planet. 

[Piratelvr1121]

The babe used to giggle at us when we'd sneeze so we'd fake sneeze to entice more out of him.

[WolfWay]

Not exactly what the kids said, but in reponse to a child's actions...

Friend said she heard her husband loudly scolding their children from the kitchen while he was feeding them "Don't wipe your face on the cat!!"

[JonGirl]

We walked past a house on the way to school today that had an old busted christmas tree on the front lawn.
DS says "look, a free christmas tree for sale!" 

[CakeEater]

DD is going through a stage where she's naming all the beginning letters of words. B is for ball, F is for fish, etc. Today she looked into the office and said, P is for 'puter.  Obviously some pronunciation issues we need to work on there.

[JonGirl]

DD is going through a stage where she's naming all the beginning letters of words. B is for ball, F is for fish, etc. Today she looked into the office and said, P is for 'puter.  Obviously some pronunciation issues we need to work on there.

Hey, even I call it that sometimes!