Author Topic: Kids say the funniest things  (Read 220268 times)

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twiggy

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #675 on: February 22, 2013, 06:59:45 PM »
Today was errands day, and as I was unloading the kids at Target, DS told his sister to leave her baby in the car, because we don't bring toys into the store. I was chatting with him and asked how did he get so smart.

DS: Well, you just teached me lots of things. And church teached me stuff, and Steve (from preschool) teached me too.
Me: Oh yeah, what did Steve teach you?
DS: Um, that boogers are yucky.
In the United States today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children.  The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted.  The result is unruly children and childish adults.  ~Thomas Szasz

parrot_girl

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #676 on: February 22, 2013, 09:11:43 PM »
One from my DD, a few years ago when she was two.
She found an old phone, not connected or anything, and held it to her ear and had the following conversation::
"Meow? Oh, meow! Meow meow meow. Meeeow, meow... oh, meow."
Then she looked at us and said "I talkin to da pussytat" and turned her back and wandered off, still saying "Meow. Meow meow meooow..."

MommyPenguin

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #677 on: February 23, 2013, 12:23:33 AM »
My husband loves to play this game with the kids where he pretends he's going to take a nap, and he needs a pillow and a blanket (or both).  If the kids don't run away quickly enough, he snags them to stuff under his head for a pillow or to drape across him as a blanket.  If they *do* run away quickly enough, they usually come back and stand close enough to be caught, because they love this game.  So, today, he started this when only my oldest, Emily, was around.  He lay down on the couch and said he was sleepy and was going to take a nap, and he needed a pillow.  So Emily immediately came running over and climbed on him, draping herself over him like a blanket.  He said, "I don't need a blanket, I need a pillow!"  And Emily said, "You get what you get and you don't throw a fit!"  This is apparently a phrase that the kids hear a *lot* in a program they go to, because they're always saying it but didn't get it from us.

MrsJWine

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #678 on: February 23, 2013, 01:54:44 AM »
My husband loves to play this game with the kids where he pretends he's going to take a nap, and he needs a pillow and a blanket (or both).  If the kids don't run away quickly enough, he snags them to stuff under his head for a pillow or to drape across him as a blanket.  If they *do* run away quickly enough, they usually come back and stand close enough to be caught, because they love this game.  So, today, he started this when only my oldest, Emily, was around.  He lay down on the couch and said he was sleepy and was going to take a nap, and he needed a pillow.  So Emily immediately came running over and climbed on him, draping herself over him like a blanket.  He said, "I don't need a blanket, I need a pillow!"  And Emily said, "You get what you get and you don't throw a fit!"  This is apparently a phrase that the kids hear a *lot* in a program they go to, because they're always saying it but didn't get it from us.

Hahah! My four year old says this all the time. I don't think she got it from us, either.


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Slartibartfast

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #679 on: February 27, 2013, 01:30:22 PM »
Babybartfast (age 4 1/2) was at a new play center recently.  When I picked her up she proudly announced to me "I made a new friend and he's a BOY and we played doctor!"

I froze for a second before asking "Oh, how did you play that?"

Turns out "playing doctor" means they argued about who had to be sick and who got to fly the helicopter  8)

RebeccainGA

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #680 on: February 27, 2013, 01:33:33 PM »
Babybartfast (age 4 1/2) was at a new play center recently.  When I picked her up she proudly announced to me "I made a new friend and he's a BOY and we played doctor!"

I froze for a second before asking "Oh, how did you play that?"

Turns out "playing doctor" means they argued about who had to be sick and who got to fly the helicopter  8)
Now my cube neighbors wonder why I'm choking - it's the effects of diet coke through the nose. LOL!

Piratelvr1121

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #681 on: February 27, 2013, 01:44:18 PM »
LOL!!! That would give me pause too, Slarti!

Last night I had a basket of laundry (it's a big round orange tub with rope handles that we originally got to hold Halloween candy) sitting in the living room that I'd folded but not yet distributed to the proper rooms.  The pirate babe (almost 16 months) likes to drag that around or push it around.  Last night he was pulling it across the room when I said "Where are you taking it now, buddy?"

He stopped, looked down into it and said "Ummmm..." That just cracked me up the way he said that, like he hadn't even thought of where he was taking it and now had to think of an answer.

A few minutes earlier I asked my middle child if he had checked the babe's diaper when he got him out of his crib.  He said no and the babe gave a gasping "OHHHH!!" Like how kids will do in a class when called out by a teacher. 
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

gramma dishes

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #682 on: February 27, 2013, 01:49:38 PM »
Babybartfast (age 4 1/2) was at a new play center recently.  When I picked her up she proudly announced to me "I made a new friend and he's a BOY and we played doctor!"

I froze for a second before asking "Oh, how did you play that?"

Turns out "playing doctor" means they argued about who had to be sick and who got to fly the helicopter  8)

I don't know if you keep a baby book (or some other kind of journal) for your child, but if you do PLEASE go right now and add this to it before you forget.  This is one of the cutest and funniest things I've ever heard.  She doesn't see the humor in it at 4 1/2, but when she's 24 1/2 she'll love knowing about this conversation.

Slartibartfast

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #683 on: February 27, 2013, 02:40:18 PM »
Babybartfast (age 4 1/2) was at a new play center recently.  When I picked her up she proudly announced to me "I made a new friend and he's a BOY and we played doctor!"

I froze for a second before asking "Oh, how did you play that?"

Turns out "playing doctor" means they argued about who had to be sick and who got to fly the helicopter  8)

I don't know if you keep a baby book (or some other kind of journal) for your child, but if you do PLEASE go right now and add this to it before you forget.  This is one of the cutest and funniest things I've ever heard.  She doesn't see the humor in it at 4 1/2, but when she's 24 1/2 she'll love knowing about this conversation.

This thread pretty much IS my baby book of cute sayings, honestly  :P  It spans back three years, to when Babybartfast was 1 1/2 and just starting to say/do really cute stuff, so every once in a while I do a search for my posts on this thread and have a laugh as I say "Ooh yeah, I forgot that one!"

twiggy

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #684 on: February 27, 2013, 03:41:29 PM »
Babybartfast (age 4 1/2) was at a new play center recently.  When I picked her up she proudly announced to me "I made a new friend and he's a BOY and we played doctor!"

I froze for a second before asking "Oh, how did you play that?"

Turns out "playing doctor" means they argued about who had to be sick and who got to fly the helicopter  8)

I don't know if you keep a baby book (or some other kind of journal) for your child, but if you do PLEASE go right now and add this to it before you forget.  This is one of the cutest and funniest things I've ever heard.  She doesn't see the humor in it at 4 1/2, but when she's 24 1/2 she'll love knowing about this conversation.

This thread pretty much IS my baby book of cute sayings, honestly  :P  It spans back three years, to when Babybartfast was 1 1/2 and just starting to say/do really cute stuff, so every once in a while I do a search for my posts on this thread and have a laugh as I say "Ooh yeah, I forgot that one!"

Me too :)

Today I got a text from Sis asking if I could watch Niece for her. So I told DS that we didn't have time to color silly masks because we have to go pick up his Cousin. He ran through the house whopping and making all kinds of commotion. Then he ran into his sister's room and yelled, "Cousin needs us. Cousin needs us. You have to get up, didn't you hear? Cousin NEEDS us!" Then he tore out of there and ran downstairs to get his socks/shoes on chanting "Quick! To the Super Van!"
In the United States today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children.  The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted.  The result is unruly children and childish adults.  ~Thomas Szasz

baglady

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #685 on: February 28, 2013, 07:40:02 PM »
I just reread through this entire thread because I needed some cheering up! It worked.

A couple from my youngest nephew, from when he was about 2.

Someone (presumably our other brother?) taught him to answer the question, "What kind of golfer is Daddy?" with "Hacker."

At about the same time he was learning about penises, and when my brother told him no, Mommy doesn't have a penis, he asked, "Man took it?"
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kajunchick

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #686 on: February 28, 2013, 08:27:58 PM »
On the topic of "playing doctor", my daughter, niece, and son (ages 7, 6, and 4) are obsessed with babies since we have a few family members expecting.

One day they were playing baby-in-the-belly (their word) running around with stuffed animals in their shirts. My mom noticed that DD's baby was wriggling. Turns out she had our cat in there! I don't know how she managed that, but he looked pretty comfy.
Everybody in this family needs to just calm down and eat some fruit or something.


mmswm

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #687 on: February 28, 2013, 08:52:35 PM »
Youngest DS is currently confined to a wheelchair.  Oldest DS was being a bit of a jerk and standing far enough into the yard that the little one couldn't get to him.  The little one finally gets frustrated and says "If you don't stop I'm going to put this thing in four wheel drive and beat you up!"
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

Rohanna

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #688 on: March 03, 2013, 09:16:06 AM »
My younger son currently has burn dressings from a restaurant coffee incident (thank you, waiter, for putting boiling coffee in front of a baby....).

I got my 4 year old to help me change him this morning by holding his hands up so he didn't get any poop on his dressings. After 10 seconds or so I get "Mummy, I'm only doing this cause I love Brother, cause HE STINKS".
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world. ~ Jack Layton.

kherbert05

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Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #689 on: March 03, 2013, 09:38:23 AM »
Brett told Sis they needed to move some things in the backyard to make room for a tiger and lion cage. His cousin wants a falcon and grappling hook. We can't wait to see what the two of them get up to next time we are all at the farm together. (They do know they aren't allowed to try and catch the alligators and to leave the Bald Eagle pair and their nest alone.)
Don't Teach Them For Your Past. Teach Them For Their Future