Author Topic: Kids say the funniest things  (Read 215999 times)

0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

shygirl

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1324
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #825 on: May 31, 2013, 12:43:52 PM »
I recently potty-trained my son, who will be 3 in July.  Whenever he goes in his potty, he'll say "Hooray for pee-pee" or "Hooray for poo-poo" depending on what he did that time.  He also throws his arms up in the arm while cheering for pee-pee or poo-poo!  I find it hilarious.

Jones

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2637
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #826 on: May 31, 2013, 12:52:06 PM »
We recently decided to practice homeschooling, as summer break just began this seems a great time to try out the fit for our family. Math, history and reading are my realm, DH gets science, geography, phys Ed and anything involving handicrafts. Anyway, apparently our history lesson was a success, because yesterday DD age 7 was telling her auntie about how women suffragists got the vote. When asked what they did to earn it, she confidently replied "They burned down a church!"
I had to leave the room to laugh...all the stories we've read and the one that jumps to her mind is the church burning.

MayHug

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 597
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #827 on: May 31, 2013, 06:10:01 PM »
My grandson 2 1/2 was playing with a toy car. He opened one door and said "mommy's seat" and the next was "daddy's seat". He then pointed to the back and said "baby's seat". Mommy then said to him " Where's Sam's seat?" He gave her a funny looked turned around and pointed to his bottom! :-)

Elfmama

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6232
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #828 on: June 01, 2013, 11:13:56 AM »
My two grandsons, ages 7 and 8, have just recently gotten into archery.  Now they're arguing over who was the best archer of all time, Robin Hood or Apollo.  ;D
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It's true. Money can't buy happiness.  You have to turn it
into books first.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

twiggy

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 785
  • wonder what this thing is
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #829 on: June 03, 2013, 01:19:55 PM »
4yo DS came up with a new game. He walked up to me and handed me a dollar. "Now you pay me Mom." So I gave it back. "No, you give me another dollar"
In the United States today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children.  The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted.  The result is unruly children and childish adults.  ~Thomas Szasz

mmswm

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2360
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #830 on: June 03, 2013, 03:50:48 PM »
Little entrepreneur there, isn't he?
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

twiggy

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 785
  • wonder what this thing is
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #831 on: June 05, 2013, 03:57:52 PM »
2yo DD has a non-standard pronunciation of the word pants. Today she was chasing Baby down the hall. He thought it was a fun game and was giggling like a loon. DD was scandalized and yelling "Baby, this you panties. You get you panties" as she waved his swim shorts around.

But the best was when we were all out to eat. DD spilled her drink in DH's lap and exclaimed, "oh no! Daddy, you panties messy." Then she looked at him sternly and said "you clean you panties this minit" which, of course, occurred at the exact moment the server came by to check on us.
In the United States today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children.  The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted.  The result is unruly children and childish adults.  ~Thomas Szasz

Jones

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2637
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #832 on: June 05, 2013, 04:47:20 PM »
Dd has been signed up for a summertime gymnastics course. Last night was her first class. When I picked her up after, she said she was sore, she planned to be sore for 3 days, she had fallen on her bum and could I PLEASE shut the radio off now. We drove home in radio silence and she's no longer sore today.

CakeBeret

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4264
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #833 on: June 06, 2013, 12:45:56 PM »
My "baby" turned 11 on Saturday. We had his party, including a cake on Friday.  Saturday morning he starts angling to have another birthday cake that night, since it was the actual day of his birthday.  I reminded him he had that the day before and he said that this year he deserved two cakes because 11 was a very special age.  I asked him why and he explained that 11 was a prime number comprised of repeating digits, and that it was the only age to meet that definition that a human was likely to be alive for, as the next number to meet it was 111 and most humans don't live that long.

He got a second birthday cake for sheer pluck.

As well he should have, what an excellent kid :)
"From a procrastination standpoint, today has been wildly successful."

CakeBeret

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4264
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #834 on: June 06, 2013, 12:53:13 PM »
My DS is 3, but his favorite number is five. He also aspires to be five years old, because he's certain that he will achieve all his dreams at that age. He wants to be an astronaut when he's five, and has also asked if he needs to be "more five" for certain activities.

Also, we live a block away from an elementary school. Every day when we pass it, he asks if he can go to school there, and I tell him maybe when he's older.

The other day we were driving home and he says to me, "Mom, Grandma says I can go to school when I'm five." in this smug little tone. As though I had been trying to discourage him from going to school but Grandma was going to let him. LOL.


Another funny. I tend to be a bit forgetful. DS and I were in the car and reached the stop sign at the end of our street. I realized I had forgotten something, so I sighed to myself and turned around without saying anything. My DS pipes up in this bored little tone, "What did you forget, Mommy?" Apparently I do that a lot.
"From a procrastination standpoint, today has been wildly successful."

Slartibartfast

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 11843
    • Nerdy Necklaces - my Etsy shop!
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #835 on: June 06, 2013, 03:42:47 PM »
Babybartfast (almost 5 now): "Mommy, I have a superpower!  I can talk through my nose!  [long pause]  Sometimes people don't understand me, though."

She's obsessed with superheroes and superpowers at the moment, so her "superpower" tends to change depending on the day and whatever's in front of her at the time, but this is one of the funnier ones  :P

twiggy

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 785
  • wonder what this thing is
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #836 on: June 06, 2013, 05:01:52 PM »
Babybartfast (almost 5 now): "Mommy, I have a superpower!  I can talk through my nose!  [long pause]  Sometimes people don't understand me, though."

She's obsessed with superheroes and superpowers at the moment, so her "superpower" tends to change depending on the day and whatever's in front of her at the time, but this is one of the funnier ones  :P

LOL @ Babybartfast! DS is about the same age, and his big thing is "skills" which encompasses everything from gymnastics/acrobatics to swim lessons to kicks/punches and everything else he can think of. Which is why he shouldn't get in trouble for jumping on the couch. He's not really jumping on the couch, which is against the rules. He's actually just doing his skills, which is not against the rules  ;)

We're watching Beauty and the Beast right now. The library scene just came up and he's asking "are they in love yet? When do they fall in love? After they fall in love, can we watch Batman?"
In the United States today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children.  The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted.  The result is unruly children and childish adults.  ~Thomas Szasz

TurtleDove

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6284
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #837 on: June 06, 2013, 05:24:37 PM »
Watching Lion King for the 547th time, I mentioned that Simba and Nahla were falling in love and would get married and then would make their own baby lion to complete the Circle of Life.  BabyDove (age 4.75) was indignant: "They do not make a baby lion.  The monkey brings the baby lion."  Fast forward about half an hour to the final scene where, sure enough, the baby lion is presented by "the monkey."  BabyDove turns to me triumphantly: "SEE????  THE MONKEY BRINGS THE BABY LION."

kherbert05

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 10475
    • Trees downed in my yard by Ike and the clean up
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #838 on: June 06, 2013, 08:28:45 PM »
This one is a heart breaking - death involved




When we walk in from recess you can see the top of the flag pole. We walked in from our last recess Tuesday and one of my student looks up at the flag pole.


Ms. Herbert, do you think people will stop killing people so Mr. Principal can raise the flag up to the top again, when we are in 3rd grade.


I'm not sure if our flag has flown at full staff, since Sandy Hook happened. We have also had the West explosion, tornadoes in OK, and 4 firefighters killed in Houston.
Don't Teach Them For Your Past. Teach Them For Their Future

kherbert05

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 10475
    • Trees downed in my yard by Ike and the clean up
Re: Kids say the funniest things
« Reply #839 on: June 06, 2013, 08:48:56 PM »
My two grandsons, ages 7 and 8, have just recently gotten into archery.  Now they're arguing over who was the best archer of all time, Robin Hood or Apollo.  ;D
I'm impressed most of my students only have the dimmest idea who Robin Hood is and wouldn't know Apollo at all
Don't Teach Them For Your Past. Teach Them For Their Future