Ettiquette Questions...

[jadesmom]

My cousin sent me some clothes for my dd at the beginning of November. I committed a huge etiquette offense by not sending her a thank you card yet. Having said that I actually have a gift card for her to a nice restaurant. I waited because I wanted to include a pic of my daughter in her Xmas outfit that she had sent. The pics actually came a day or two before Xmas. Do you think it is still to late to send her the card? Or is that tacky to send it that late? I don't want to do more harm than I have already done.

My second question is about mesage board etiquette. I offered some clothes to a member of a board that both of us frequent on a daily basis. I told her all I wanted for them is postage. Well I told her what the postage would be and she responded saying that she would send the money out the next day. Well that was half a month ago. I haven't contacted her about not receiving anything because I didn't want to seem pushy. If she wants them fine and if not fine.
Would you contact her and say I hadn't received anything yet and wanted to make sure she hadn't sent anything? Or would you just assume she jut didn't want them and let it go? I also thought about just sending the clothes on to her saying that I had some extra money for the postage. I really don't expect anything in return, I just don't know ow to handle the situation n now. I forgot to mention that the group is pretty small and close. I would appreciate any feed back or advice you could give. Thanks.

[lolane]

It is never too late to thank someone. I think you should sent the note out.

As far as the clothes, if you want to send them, send them. If you really would prefer she send postage contact her and say, "I hadn't heard from you about the clothes, I wanted to check to see if you still wanted them before I donated them/sold them/ gave them to someone else."

[FoxPaws]

On the clothes you were sent:

Send the card along with the pics - better late than never - plus now you can tell her how much DD has enjoyed wearing the clothes.

On the clothes you want to send:

Contact her and ask if she's still interested. Let her know it's OK if she's changed her mind (she may not have said anything because she's afraid of hurting your feelings), you just need to know by the end of the month (or whatever date you choose) so you can pass the clothes on to someone else if she doesn't want them. Perhaps she just got distracted with the holidays and just needs a little reminder.

[Rose2Bear]

For Question #1, it's never too late, maybe explain something like "sorry I'm getting this out late, it's been crazy with the holidays, but here is a picture of Suzie in the cute outfit you got her!"  and then go on to write all the nice "thank you so much" type lines. Becasue you're sending a gift card AND a picture of your daughter in the outfit it will be nice, becasue everyone likes giftcards and the picture will show that you really do like the clothes and were not just avoiding writing a note becasue you did not like them.

For Question #2, inquire if she still wants the clothes. Mabye she just forgot. If she seems wishy-washy, then take that as a hint that she wasn't really that interested, but maybe she has a lot of her plate and really did just forget and needs/will appreciate the reminder.

[sammycat]

I echo what the other posters have said but want to add one more thing about question 2.  I would definitely check with the lady in case she actually sent the money and it has gone missing, assuming it was sent via mail.  If that is the case she may be wondering why you haven't sent the clothes yet.  If she was transferring funds electronically then I guess my suggestion is irrelevant.