Author Topic: Thank you note dilema  (Read 295 times)

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Thank you note dilema
« on: Yesterday at 09:44:05 PM »
While at a family funeral, a woman approached my 23 year old DS and said "I heard you just graduated from University. Congratulations." and handed him a hundred dollars. He thanked her. He mentioned it to his dad and me the next day. I think that he should write a thank you note, but he has no idea who gave him the gift, and we couldn't figure it out from his description.

Should I call people and ask if they gave him the gift, or know who did? Or would that just seem like I was hinting that everyone should send a present? Since he is an adult, is it none of my business? As far as he is concerned, he thanked the lady, so nothing else needs to be done. There is a good chance that my curiosity is overtaking my common sense.

gramma dishes

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Re: Thank you note dilema
« Reply #1 on: Yesterday at 10:16:33 PM »
Hmm ... that really is a bit of a dilemma!

When someone is handing you $100, it would seem a bit crass to say "... oh, thanks!  Who are you?"
Obviously she assumed he knew her.  It's too bad your son didn't ask his Dad or you right away after it happened, but he didn't.  So now you have to try to figure it out.

She clearly is close enough to know that your son just graduated.  So someone in your family that your son doesn't know well?  A very close family friend who may also have been a relative or close friend of the deceased?

If you keep your ears open and you eventually hear someone say "Well, Jehosophatina says she gave Georgie's son $100 and he never even sent a thank you", then you'll know.  Then you can get her address and your son can write her a belated thank you note explaining that he had a little trouble getting her address. 

Otherwise, don't worry about it, but yes.  It would bother me too.


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Re: Thank you note dilema
« Reply #2 on: Today at 06:05:18 AM »
Since DS thanked the giver in person, I doubt that she's expecting a thank you note.

It would be a nice thing to do - if her identity was known - but unless/until it is, I wouldn't worry about it.