Cell phones in the bathroom

[Danismom]

BG:  I was recently at a store and DD (3yo) needed to go to the bathroom.  She's pretty good at giving me some notice before it's urgent, for which I am VERY thankful.  DD, DS (21mo) and I entered the bathroom which had 2 stall -- 1 regular and 1 handicap.  As soon as we went in, I heard what clearly a cell phone conversation coming from the handicap stall.  (There were no family bathrooms.)  We had to wait for the handicap stall since I thought that I might as well go too since we were there anyway.  The woman on the phone was chatting away loudly but there were no other "bathroom" sounds coming from her stall.  The woman in the smaller stall was using the restroom.  DD kept asking me questions about why we had to wait so long.  I just kept affirming that I knew she needed to go potty and that we were waiting for the bigger potty.  I was (perhaps rudely) saying this loudly enough that everyone in the small bathroom should be able to hear it clearly, though I wasn't yelling.  Finally the woman came out of the handicap stall, still on the phone. I also know that it really bugs me if I'm trying to use the bathroom and someone is on their phone.  I don't want to be overheard on a phone.  I'm shy enough about just knowing there are other people in other stalls! [/bg]

So here are my general questions:
1) Is it rude to talk on the phone while others are using the bathroom even if you aren't?
2) Calling out rudeness is impolite.  So is there anything that can be said when you are in the next stall and don't want to be overheard?
3) Any suggestions about the situation I was in with my kids?

[Rosey]

Unfortunately this is a topic that tends to go in circles.   

I think it's rude if she was only in the stall because she was on the phone, but I don't know how you'd prove it, kwim?

Other than that, I don't personally think it's rude to talk on the phone in the bathroom, but I know a lot of people disagree with me. 

[Cuddlepie]

My opinion ** is that it is rude to talk on your cell causing others to wait longer to use the restroom.  No-one, particularly children, pregnant ladies and those the IBS, for example, should be forced to listen to someone chatting and not getting down to business  .

** This will remain my opinion until the restroom signs include a pic of a cell phone.  At the moment I interpret the pic as depicting a restroom not a phone booth.   

[StarFaerie]

My opinion ** is that it is rude to talk on your cell causing others to wait longer to use the restroom.  No-one, particularly children, pregnant ladies and those the IBS, for example, should be forced to listen to someone chatting and not getting down to business  .

** This will remain my opinion until the restroom signs include a pic of a cell phone.  At the moment I interpret the pic as depicting a restroom not a phone booth.   

POD

And the person on the other end of the line should not have to listen to the person with IBS in the stall next to the talker (I have IBS so no offense is meant). Bathrooms are for certain private actions not for talking on the phone.

However all you can actually do as the non-talker is wait.

[Twik]

EvilTwik might have told EvilDaughter "I know! Let's sing REALLY LOUD while we're waiting!!" 

[Master_Edward]

I completely agree with Rosey. Besides even if the person on the other end of the cellphone conversation can hear you "doing your business" it's not like they're going to know it's you. Not that I'd want to hear that but it's one of those things that I really don't think you can do anything about.

Ed.

[jane7166]

EvilTwik might have told EvilDaughter "I know! Let's sing REALLY LOUD while we're waiting!!" 

I love that! 

Evil Me wants to flush several times in the stall next to the offender.  But I don't.  I don't make any effort to be quiet, however. 

[auntmeegs]

You can have a skype conversation in the bathroom for all I care - as long as you are not tying up a stall and preventing someone from using it who really needs to.

[SingActDance]

You can have a skype conversation in the bathroom for all I care - as long as you are not tying up a stall and preventing someone from using it who really needs to.

POD. You can multitask all you want in the bathroom. Talk, file your nails, whatever. But you shouldn't take any longer than you normally would.

[Judah]

IMO using a phone in the bathroom is not rude, but using a bathroom stall as a phone booth is.

[ipsedixit]

Unfortunately this is a topic that tends to go in circles.   

I think it's rude if she was only in the stall because she was on the phone, but I don't know how you'd prove it, kwim?

Other than that, I don't personally think it's rude to talk on the phone in the bathroom, but I know a lot of people disagree with me. 

I agree with this.  Unless you know she was using the stall for just the phone, I don't think she was rude.  Some people are just multitaskers  

Was there another stall available?  The bigger one may been more convenient, however, if you gotta go, you gotta do what is necessary.  

[Danismom]

Initially both stalls were taken.  The smaller stall was vacated first.  However, I would have been trying to help a 3 yo and hold onto a 21 mo old.  The stall was small enough that it would mean not being able to close the door.  I was about to tell DD to go ahead when phone woman came out.  We had probably been waiting 7-8 minutes.

Personally, I disagree that its fine to do whatever you want while in a bathroom stall.  Filing your nails or playing on your phone while you go is fine.  It doesn't impact others at all.  However, talking on the phone does.  I do think it's rude to talk on the phone while others are using the facilities.  I don't have a problem with it when there is no one else using the bathroom though.

[saki]

I'm confused in general as to what on earth women are actually doing in the stalls.  I get so frustrated waiting ages in line because women take so long.  You can often not hear any bathroom type noises for 5-10 mins at a time from a stall before someone emerges - what is that about?  I know sometimes there's other stuff that you might want to do in a stall - adjust clothing, menstruation related things - but it feels like almost every woman takes ages and they can't all be doing this stuff.  When you know that there's a queue, I think that's really rude, whether or not it involves a phone!

[Betelnut]

In this specific example, I would have used the smaller stall.  Even if the door had to remain open which is what I did many times with my daughter when she still needed help in the bathroom.  I doubt many women would flinch at seeing a little girl peeing.

[ipsedixit]

I'm confused in general as to what on earth women are actually doing in the stalls.  I get so frustrated waiting ages in line because women take so long.  You can often not hear any bathroom type noises for 5-10 mins at a time from a stall before someone emerges - what is that about?  I know sometimes there's other stuff that you might want to do in a stall - adjust clothing, menstruation related things - but it feels like almost every woman takes ages and they can't all be doing this stuff.  When you know that there's a queue, I think that's really rude, whether or not it involves a phone!

I know once I had the most awful flu.  It took me down for 4 days.  On the third day I gained some strength and had to go get a perscription filled.  I walked into Big Bullseye Store, felt sick, got dizzy, headed to the bathroom and almost passed out.  I was in there for probably 20 minutes before I was able to get back up.  It probably looked like I was sleeping or something.  I'm a get-in-and-get-out type of person, but after that, I don't think I'll pass judgment just because someone wasn't making bathroom related noises. Unless it's a one stall place, I don't think it's rude to take the time you need in a bathroom.

Maybe that's the crux of it for me.  A stall had opened up, it just wasn't the one the OP wanted to use so she chose to wait.  It may have required a lot of manuvering, but it was possible for her to use it.  So if there was a queue, one bathroom was open and available for use.  

I do think it would be OK, after a few minutes, to politely tap on the door and say that you need to use *that* stall.  It alerts the person that there is a queue and you cannot use the other one.  My handicapped Aunts have done this on a few occassions where someone was in the handicap stall for a while.