Gracious general

[aventurine]

I didn't know if there had been a post made about this classy gesture.  I love this and the other examples in the piece.

[atirial]

The general one is fine, but the Sinatra seemed a little off. If I read it correctly, he was in his ex-wife's house and smashed something that wasn't his to cover the guest's mistake. Unless he made the damage right with his ex-wife afterwards it seems wrong.

[aventurine]

Unless he made the damage right with his ex-wife afterwards it seems wrong.

I choose to believe that he did.    It wasn't mentioned that the doves were valuable antiques or heirlooms, just "favorites."

[Master_Edward]

Yeah I like those, nice stories. Except for the Frank Sinatra incident, I'm not impressed with that at all. That's just stupid.

Ed.

[NutMeg]

Yeah, the Sinatra thing seemed off to me too. I'm glad he tried to make the woman feel comfortable, but honestly? If the birds were his ex-wife's favourites, then how is offering her money for them supposed to make it right? Yes, one was broken by accident and that's life, but surely that doesn't mean that she can't keep the other one.

[Sharnita]

I could care less whether he paid for the damage, the fact that he glared at his duaghter, apparently making her feel small in his attempt to put a guest at ease is obnoxious.  The deciosion to compound the destruction to show her that somebody else's property didn't matter to himseems more like grandstanding than anything else.

[KimberlyRose]

Yeah, not sure how deliberately destroying something his ex-wife treasured made Sinatra into "a big person."  Full marks to Chiarelli and Malone, though.

[hyzenthlay]

The problem with this is that his gesture didn't let her error go without notice. It made it a big deal, and a story, and I think it's not the right thing to call so much attention to a legitimate mistake.

'So sorry Ma'am I'm afraid I'm not on the staff.'

[JenJay]

The problem with this is that his gesture didn't let her error go without notice. It made it a big deal, and a story, and I think it's not the right thing to call so much attention to a legitimate mistake.

'So sorry Ma'am I'm afraid I'm not on the staff.'

I didn't get the sense that HE wanted it to turn into a story, though. I think his only intent was to turn an awkward moment into a lighthearted one and get a glass of wine for a lady. If he's the one who provided the anecdote for media attention then yes, not at all classy, but I don't think it was him?

[kglory]

Ditto that the Frank Sinatra thing is horrible!  Way to be respectful of your daughter and ex-wife.

[Sharnita]

Ditto that the Frank Sinatra thing is horrible!  Way to be respectful of your daughter and ex-wife.

Exactly. If he wanted to demonstrate that material items don't matter why didn't he find one of his gold records/grammies/etc to use for the demonstration?

[FenigDurak]

There used to be a school of thought that if a guest made a gaffe, the host should mimic the gaffe to not only make the guest feel more at ease, but to downplay the gaffe in the eyes of the other guests as well. Its similar to a scene in "The Princess Diaries" when Anne Hathaway eats too large of a bite of ice cream and to prevent her from looking foolish, two others do as well. I can also think of a scene in Broadway's "Wicked" where Glinda dances like Elphaba to make her seem less awkward and turn the dance into a fad.
As for the glare at his daughter, I'm willing to bet it was a stern fatherly look to cut off a poorly thought comment. Our parents lessons rarely stop when we turn 18. I'm almost 30 and Im still being taught things by my mother.
Whether we know if Sinatra replaced the birds or not doesn't matter, but rather that he took measures to ensure his guests were made to feel welcome.

[Sterling]

I thought the glare was the same one any parent gives a child when they want to warn them to not say another word.  I don't think that is disrespectful.  Considering he was acting as host in his ex wife's home I am willing to bet they while he understood they were her favorites he also knew it was ok.