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  • August 30, 2016, 09:42:33 PM

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Author Topic: Dear Dog:  (Read 155805 times)

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Gladly

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1005 on: July 06, 2016, 09:42:31 AM »
Dear Zoe,

I know that your daughter is 4 months old now, and you think that you've done enough rearing her.  You did a fantastic job with your puppies.  The others are all in their new forever homes, and Nutmeg is staying for good.  However, she is not old enough to be trusted with the run of the house.  You usually sleep in the kitchen anyway, so surely it's not too much to ask you to sleep in there with your baby?  Please stop shouting at 3.30am to tell me that you are bored with babysitting!

Your sleepy foodgiver.

 ;D ;D

I think you're right, and when I get up and open the kitchen door, Nutmeg is curled up in her bed with her most innocent "Who, me?" expression!
Dear Foodgiver,
You know how annoying the offspring are when they're that age?  They want to play all day and all night!  It's Chase Mama's Tail, Chew Mama's Ears, Bite Mama's toes, Bounce on Mama's head, all night long!  You'd shout too if it were you!

Love,
Mama dogs and cats

siamesecat2965

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1006 on: July 19, 2016, 08:06:04 AM »
Dear puppy niece and nephew;
Yes I know that overnight you have practically starved to death, and that when I get up, that's a sign for the first feeding of the day. However, your aunt doesn't do mornings well, and needs a bit of time once the alarm goes off, to wake up. So pelase stop the whining, crying, and carrying on to get me to get up, let you out, and feed you.

You won't die of hunger.

MissRose

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1007 on: July 26, 2016, 05:48:08 AM »
Dear Banana,

I think you are the one getting into the garbage at my sister's place.  After all you are the only one who got a few streaks of hair dye on your snout from when your human mom did my hair color and put the dirty gloves and stuff in the garbage. Sorry, I don't think Loreal Feria does your white fur any good LOL!

Love,

Auntie Janet aka the bringer of treats

Gladly

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1008 on: July 27, 2016, 03:10:27 AM »
Dear Cheetah,

I know you love it when you stay with the Grandma-human, and she usually loves having you to stay.  You have realised that it's hard for her to get down the step to empty the kitchen bin into the dustbin outside.  It's very kind of you to help her with this task, but she actually finds it just as hard, and very frustrating, to pick all the rubbish off the floor when you've emptied the bin for her.

She who is getting it in the ear from her mother!

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1009 on: July 27, 2016, 02:38:59 PM »
Dear Wolfie:

I know you like carrots.  But why the heck do you like tomatoes?  And who knew your palate was so discerning?  You ate the two ripe ones but bit into and spit out the not quite ripe ones.  My fault for leaving them within dog reach but I thought a sharp 'Leave it!' was enough, since that's been working.

Duly noted - I'll make sure I put the harvest further up or take it right into the kitchen where you are not currently permitted.

The provider of treats and carrots.

After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

LadyJaneinMD

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1010 on: July 28, 2016, 08:34:37 AM »
Dear Wolfie:

I know you like carrots.  But why the heck do you like tomatoes?  And who knew your palate was so discerning?  You ate the two ripe ones but bit into and spit out the not quite ripe ones.  My fault for leaving them within dog reach but I thought a sharp 'Leave it!' was enough, since that's been working.

Duly noted - I'll make sure I put the harvest further up or take it right into the kitchen where you are not currently permitted.

The provider of treats and carrots.

But Mooooommmm!!  Tomatoes are so yummy!
You'll get them back, when they start growing in the yard next year, everywhere that I left a seed (with fertilizer). 

(My dog did this. She used to actually run down to the garden and eat them off the plants.  Then the next year we had a nice crop of rogue tomato plants growing all over the place).

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1011 on: July 28, 2016, 08:36:38 AM »
Thank goodness our plants are in a raised garden bed that they can only jump up to with extreme effort and not always successfully!  Or he'd be right in there.
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

Semperviren

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1012 on: July 28, 2016, 09:45:18 AM »
Dear Lily,

I saw you smirk when the vet said you should rest as much as possible until the inflammation in your back goes down. It's the princess treatment you've been telling us you deserve your whole life- being lifted on and off the couch 3,549 times per day and being allowed to nap all you want.

Congratulations,
Mom

KB

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1013 on: July 28, 2016, 11:14:47 PM »
Dear Lily

I thought I was going to be lucky when the vet said that to me, too, but then she brought out a cage and I was stuck in it for a whole week! It was horrible. So be careful!

Patch

andi

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1014 on: July 30, 2016, 04:42:40 PM »
Bailey Boo - 

Please stop eating the sprinkler heads. We dos not own this house and daddy is tired of fixing them. Plus you don't need the plastic.

Jack Jack - leave the neighbor dog alone. You do not need to run over and bark at them every time you go out. It's annoying for us and them. One day they're gone to get fed up and try to eat you.

Julian

  • I lost it between Thriller and Gangnam Style...
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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1015 on: July 31, 2016, 08:26:44 PM »
Dear Suzi

The chickens and ducks do not need to be supervised, much less micro-managed.  I do appreciate that you're not chasing or scaring them, but honey-girl, they aren't doing anything wrong, so just leave them be, okay?

By the way, when Mr Duck comes running at you with his bill open and hissing, it means Leave Mrs Duck Alone. 

Lots of love,
Mum.

Dear Molly

I'm glad you're behaving around the chickens too.  Going back to bed because they're boring is a smart move.  Good girl!

Lots of love, Mum.

Dear Ella

Once you get back home the ducks and chooks will be locked up again.  I still haven't forgiven you for sneaking into the pen and killing Phyllis Diller. 

Not so much Love
Aunty Julian

Out on the patio we'd sit,
And the humidity we'd breathe,
We'd watch the lightning crack over canefields
Laugh and think, this is Australia.

Ganggajang - Sounds Of Then (This Is Australia)

andi

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1016 on: August 07, 2016, 10:23:37 PM »
Bailey -
I know you love having a back yard again. But be please stop running circles around Jack while he's trying to potty. Every time you make a lap he gets upset and has to find a new spot and star over. 

Gladly

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1017 on: August 17, 2016, 07:36:36 AM »
Dear Robin,

I know that for most of your life you've had to cow-tow to the girls, and it's great that you now have a younger boy who will do what you tell him.  Believe me, he does want to do what you say, just as he has done for the past 2 years.  Yes, Socks is a grown up now, but he's still the biggest wimp I've ever come across, and he really is not threat to you. Nor does he have any desire to take over your harem.  Please stop glaring and posturing at him.


Dear Socks,

You might find life easier if you didn't rush gleefully up to Robin every time you see him.  I know you love him, but right now he doesn't think he loves you.

The Exasperated One.

greencat

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1018 on: August 17, 2016, 10:54:20 AM »
Dear Rocky,
I'm sorry I bought the salmon-flavored dog food this week.  While you like it quite a bit, so do the cats, and the cats are terrible people who steal your food.
Love,
The human

Julian

  • I lost it between Thriller and Gangnam Style...
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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #1019 on: August 17, 2016, 07:48:02 PM »
Dear Suzi

Today you have officially been sacked from your Chicken Mama gig, and have lost your chicken run privileges.  Firstly, you didn't come when I called you, secondly you kept harassing the ducks.  Mr Duck chased you because Mrs Duck is expecting babies.

Sweetie, you knew you were being naughty.  I know, because you wouldn't look me in the eye. 

Fortunately all the chickens and ducks are fine, but I think Mr Duck has your number now...

Disappointed love,
Mum

Out on the patio we'd sit,
And the humidity we'd breathe,
We'd watch the lightning crack over canefields
Laugh and think, this is Australia.

Ganggajang - Sounds Of Then (This Is Australia)