Author Topic: Facebook Girls Gone Wild!  (Read 4093 times)

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jimithing

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Facebook Girls Gone Wild!
« on: May 29, 2011, 09:43:59 PM »
I need some help with some wording to make sure I don't sound annoyed or snarky.

I have a friend going through a really tough time right now. She is waiting to get back some medical results and a diagnosis for her medical issues. She has told three people, other than family. Me and two mutual friends.

The three of us talked about what we could do to help her, and discussed doing a smallish GNO next week, to help keep her busy and keep her mind off of it. We discussed it with her and she is totally on board. Because she doesn't want people to know what is going on, until she gets an official diagnosis, I decided to call it a general "Beginning of Summer GNO."

I sent out a FB message yesterday, to about 15 women. I have had 3-4 responses from women who can't attend but who are all suggesting different dates, times, or location.

I don't want to be rude, but we aren't moving this. And I can't say why. I have no issues with people scheduling additional dates for us to get together, but I do find it presumptuous to start making suggestions about moving this one.

Any suggestions for how to politely state that we are not moving this GNO? It's getting to be a bit frustrating.
« Last Edit: May 29, 2011, 11:03:57 PM by jimithing »

jmarvellous

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Crazy!
« Reply #1 on: May 29, 2011, 10:03:40 PM »
"Sorry, we've already picked a night that works for (the four of us). Hopefully you can join us next time!"

Brentwood

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Crazy!
« Reply #2 on: May 29, 2011, 10:49:03 PM »
I agree that it's presumptuous for people to try moving the event you've scheduled.

The wording jmarvellous suggested sounds fine to me. This is your event, you hope people can join you for it, and if not - perhaps a different event at a different time.

Lisbeth

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Crazy!
« Reply #3 on: May 29, 2011, 10:50:10 PM »
"Unfortunately, the event can only be held at the stated date, time, and location.  We're sorry to miss you!"
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magician5

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Wild!
« Reply #4 on: May 30, 2011, 06:14:08 AM »
"I wish I could, but it's not possible."
There is no 'way to peace.' Peace is the way.

Ceiling Fan

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Wild!
« Reply #5 on: May 30, 2011, 12:16:40 PM »
Wow. If 15 people is a 'smallish' GNO, I'd love to see what a big one is like in your circle ;D

I agree with PPs "X is the date for this GNO, we look forward to seeing you another time."

jimithing

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Wild!
« Reply #6 on: May 30, 2011, 12:58:06 PM »
Thanks for the all the suggestions! I ended going with something like what Lisbeth suggested, and just said I would love to get together whenever they planned something else.

Oh, and CF, we invited 15, knowing that many wouldn't be able to come, so it's looking like there will only be 6 of us! :)

AmethystAnne

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Wild!
« Reply #7 on: June 06, 2011, 01:11:43 AM »
What does "GNO" mean?  ???

Ceiling Fan

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Wild!
« Reply #8 on: June 06, 2011, 01:17:20 AM »
Girls Night Out :)

ettiquit

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Wild!
« Reply #9 on: June 09, 2011, 10:39:15 AM »
My DH and I host a Movie Night once a month.  I invite the same group of people each time, and sometimes people can come and sometimes they can't.  I did have someone ask if we'd move it, and I pretty much said what Lisbeth suggested.  Honestly, we'll happily have a movie night with just the two of us, so if it's a bad date for everyone...oh well.  ;D

I think this is only a little bit rude though, since the reason they're asking is because they really want to go.

AmethystAnne

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Wild!
« Reply #10 on: June 09, 2011, 02:43:18 PM »
Girls Night Out :)

Thank you!

Sounds like fun.  :)

Deetee

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Re: Facebook Girls Gone Wild!
« Reply #11 on: June 09, 2011, 02:52:07 PM »
I was thinking about this and it's interesting because with a smaller group of people I would consider that friendly and polite.

If it's two people it's pretty much expected

eg
Bob "Want to grab a coffee next Thursday?'
Sue "I can't, sorry" (Translation NO, go away)
vs
Bob "Want to grab a coffee next Thursday?'
Sue "I can't, how about Wednesday?" (Translation I still want to go for coffee)

With 3 or 4 people you can have some back and forth and it still works.

So I think the suggested date can be seen as not a "change this date for my convenience" but as a "I can't go, but I really wish I could". It conveys a legitimate regret at not being able to attend as opposed to not wanting to attend.