Author Topic: Worst Date Ever.....  (Read 74734 times)

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Zen

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #90 on: June 14, 2011, 04:06:01 PM »
Quote
Quote from: Zen on Yesterday at 09:38:22 PM
When I was in high school, I was friendly with a bunch of the drama/electronic magic people. One of the guys asks me on a date. We were nearly at summer break at that point, so we made arrangements for him to come and pick me up at my house on a date that was about three weeks after the end of school. And the day comes, and goes, and he does not appear. I was annoyed, but not entirely surprised, as this guy had been a little flaky about showing up on time before this. So, two months pass, and summer break is coming to an end, and I am surprised one Sunday morning with a knoclk on the door. It's the guy, ready for our date. He claims he forgot my address, and my last name, and what day he was supposed to pick me up.  But being young, and not having much else to do, I get ready to leave and go with him.
A very long story short, I get food poisoning from the pizza we ate (the pizza place we went to closed about a month after causing me to swear off pesto for the rest of my life), and we both hate the movie we ended up watching. He drops me off at home early, and I figure that is probably that.
The kicker? Our 5th wedding anniversary is in about a month, and it's also the 10th anniversary of the day he randomly showed up at my door after standing me up. Smiley
Quote
I love this story!  Are you Meg Ryan and is he Tom Hanks?
:looks at husband: :looks in mirror: Nope. Unless Meg Ryan suddenly grew four or five inches and changed hair and eye color. Or Tom Hanks became devastatingly handsome. If this really was a movie plot, that would be awesome, because then I'd have something else to irritate him with other than this just this story when we get asked how we started dating.

supernova

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #91 on: June 14, 2011, 04:06:31 PM »
For some reason, EHarmony thinks I am only compatible with computer programmers. I have not, to this date, found this to be true.

One thing I always made clear before going out for a first date was that I was a Big Girl. I was overwieght. Not just a few pounds heavy - a few dozen pounds heavy, so if they weren't into that they should move one. My picture was also a full body picture, so there were no surprises there.

Met one guy at a sushi place and I could just see his face fall. Dinner started awkwardly as he wouldn't converse with me. I start monologuing and he interrupts me, "I didn't think you would be so... big."

 ???

I asked, "What made you think I wasn't? My picture? The time I told you flat out that I was?" His response? "You just didn't sound big on the phone."

 ??? ???

I told him this obviously wasn't working, paid my part of the bill (packed up my sushi! Big girl gotta eat!  ;)) and left. Then went home and had a cry. That's exactly why I am so up front about weight issues.

Peas, I had no idea that you were me!!!  I've had that date conversation a good dozen times.  I just don't understand how these guys think...   ::)

LeeLee88

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #92 on: June 14, 2011, 04:10:47 PM »
eclecticgrrl--I'm just baffled that your date could criticize *you* because guys kept s*xually harrassing you. How on earth is that your fault? I wanted to slap every person in that story but you.  >:(

Now see???  This is MY point and one that I'm happy to make to BF every time we end telling that story!  He was clearly not understanding that I didn't ask these people to be jerks.  I'm glad that someone else sees that too.

I was wondering that myself.  How is that your fault?  I wanted to be in line behind Petticoats and also slap everyone in that story except for you.

POD. Can I be in line behind you? And can I wear a nice leather glove so my hand doesn't hurt as much when I've completed the slapping?

I have a fine pair that we can split.  Plus, there's something about a good, tight leather glove that makes me want to slap something, I don't know why.  Anywhosers, it sounds like we've got a slapping party going!

Glove slap!  Baby, glove slap!

True story, I like to use those gloves to challenge friends and family to duels in the winter time. 

Petticoats

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #93 on: June 14, 2011, 04:14:08 PM »
Glove slap!  Baby, glove slap!

You know, you just can't beat the classics. :)

I thought of another colorful dating anecdote--not a bad date per se, but an odd one. One of my best friends set me up with a guy she works with--at least, a guy who works for the same business, who she talks to a lot re tech support. Friend is usually very selective about who she sets me up with (this was maybe the third guy in 15 years).

So he and I meet up at a coffee place, where he doesn't order a thing, and I buy myself a beverage of some kind to justify our taking up their space, and he launches into the Trauma Monologue. His opener was the story of how his alcoholic girlfriend died in his arms after refusing to get what turned out to be breast cancer checked out. (He even gave me graphic descriptions of her breast.) Now he feels responsible for this woman's adult daughter, so as soon as she gets out of prison (!) for multiple counts of shoplifting, he's going to take her under his wing and get her straightened out. He's a firm believer that people can start over fresh, because--wait for it--he was convicted of a felony as a youngster. He straightened himself out to the point that he got a high-clearance job with the Dept. of Defense; yes, he had 9/11 stories from his time at the Pentagon.

Finally, after about 90 minutes of highlights from the drama that was his life, we parted with amiable token comments about getting together for a movie. I had managed to force my way into the "conversation" a few times, but he just re-launched. I suspect he was lonely and that made him a big talker, but there weren't even any token questions about me or my life. ("So, Petticoats, what medical traumas have you borne witness to?") Truthfully, he seemed like a nice guy, but... yeah.

I reported back to my fixer-up friend, and she is consumed with guilt. ("I set you up with a felon!") He'd even told her the dead-girlfriend story, and she'd told him not to lead with that.  Aaaand he led with it anyway.

POF

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #94 on: June 14, 2011, 04:22:19 PM »
Ok, mine is actually part of the stories on the main page.  :)


After my divorce, and I was ready to start dating again, I signed up with a few on line dating agencies.  I got a ton of weirdoes, which I quickly screened out.  Then "Mike" emailed me.  He seemed nice enough, we exchanged a few emails, finally went on to a phone call.   Again, he seemed nice enough, seemed to have a good sense of humor, seemed smart.  We exchanged pictures.  Not a bad looking guy.. pics are kinda out of focus ... but to me, it's not looks, but what the person truly is.  We decided to meet. 

He told me he was 5'10" and 170 lbs.  Nice size, since I'm 5'2" and 125.  So, I go to the public location where we are to meet.  I don't see any 5'10" guy walking around, but I do see this little nervous guy about 5'1" and maybe.. MAYBE 110 lbs.  Yup.  Not only was I taller, but I outweighed him.   That was Mike.   We decided to go to a huge open market in Seattle for our date.  This guy IMMEDIATELY latched onto me and would not let go.  Each time we walked by another guy, Mike would wrap both arms around me and cling to me.  UGH.  Finally I had to pat his arm and say "Don't worry.. I'll protect you."   

Mike must have suffered from sinus problems.  He kept blowing his nose into his hanky.    He'd pull out that hanky, honk loudly into it, THEN PEEK!!   Also, he kept um.... releasing intestinal pressure.  We all fart, and sometimes one does slip out.  You get embarrassed, say excuse me, and move on.  Not this guy. He kept farting.  Didn't say boo diddly about it either.   

We went into one of the shops there.  It had all kinds of old stuff, which I love looking at.  I picked up a hat, tried it on, and thought it looked really cute.  The price was much much MUCH more than I would have thought, and I said a surprised "Sh*t!!"    You'd think I just ran over Mike's mother the way he carried on.  He threw his arms up, looked completely surprised, stuttered.. and said he's not used to such 'foul language.' 

Well, by this time I know the date's gonna end soon and it's gonna be the ONLY date.  So I had to have fun with him.  I started saying every cuss word I could think of just to watch his reaction.   We got hungry, so we went to eat.  He said he couldn't eat spicy as it didn't agree with him.  So we went to a Chinese place and got Mongolian Beef.  Um... SPICY!  The waiter kinda tossed two menus onto a dirty table in the corner and said that was our table and pointed us there.  He brought the tea, I poured (Mike's cup first, manners you know) and the pot kinda slopped a bit.  Mike jumped up, squealed like a little girl, threw his arms up and jumped back about 3 feet.  All for a drop of tea that landed on the table.   

The Mongolian Beef comes and we start eating.  I used the chopsticks and wasn't paying attention to Mike, kinda just nodding and saying "uh huh" a lot.  I was starving so was eating.  I ate a good 2/3 of my lunch, then glanced at Mike's plate.  He barely had 1/4 of his gone.  He said "Oh, I chew each bite 27 times.  It helps me digest it better."  Sheesh.   I said I wanted to go home as I had to pick up my son and take him to a movie I had promised to take him to.  We're walking to the car and I was putting my earrings in my ears.  I have 7 holes.  He looked kinda nervous and asked if I had my nose pierced.  I don't, but I have a teeny gold hoop earring that will sit just right so it looks like I do.  I put that on and grinned at him.  He looked even MORE nervous and asked if I had anything else pierced.  Right there on the streets of Seattle I said, loudly, "SURE!!  Both nipples!!  Wanna see??"  and started unbuttoning my shirt.  The look on his face was priceless.   That was a first date/LAST date with that guy.  I did call him up and thank him for a memorable afternoon (hey, I didn't lie!), but I don't think we'd be compatible in a serious dating situation.

I just let out a loud screech and scared my secretary ...... that is hysterical........

Carnation

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #95 on: June 14, 2011, 05:05:30 PM »
Here's one I didn't go on.

My best friend in high school had a boyfriend I'll call Dirty Larry.  Because his name was Larry and well, you know.

When senior prom rolled around, Larry had to work on prom night, so Best Friend decided to go with Rick.  Rick was sort of our all around good guy friend.   He was only a junior, and it was a good way to include him in at the senior prom.

Sooo, all of a sudden Dirty Larry didn't have to work.   Still Best Friend had agreed to go with Rick. :-\

One morning, I was getting ready for school when I got a phone call.   Dirty Larry was asking me to the prom.   As much as I would have liked going to the prom, I didn't want to go with him.  Ugh, hygiene issues. :P


I should asked all involved if I could have gone with Rick, leaving D.L. to go with Best Friend.

I don't think he would have minded.


auntmeegs

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #96 on: June 14, 2011, 05:09:47 PM »
My friends and I still laugh about this and we even have a nickname for this guy that's not appropriate for the forum....

My ex and I were separated and in divorce proceedings and after months of deep sadness and mourning, I decided that maybe I was ready to start dating again.  My friend at work wanted to fix me up with this utterly drop dead gorgeous man she is friends with (I had seen him a few times before because he is a vendor for our company and comes in occasionally to meet with someone here).  I mean, this guy is sooo gorgeous, Iíd have to say he is probably the best looking person I had ever seen in real life.  So anyway, my friend mentions it to him and apparently heís noticed me and thinks Iím hot too so she gives him my phone number.  He calls the next day and we talk for a while and agree that he will pick me up for a date that Saturday.  He seems really nice and normal, though I had heard some pretty wild stories about him from my friend.  Whatever, I have a bit of a wild side myself so I figure I can handle it.

On Saturday evening he arrives at the appointed time, looking absolutely beautiful.  We went to a really nice place for dinner and had a great time.  Conversation is flowing, weíre flirting, itís all going so well that we even go to the bar for another drink after dinner.  When he drops me off, we kiss and it was great.  He calls me a few days later and asks if I want to go out again that weekend and of course I say yes.  

So he comes to pick me up and as Iím inviting him in, my doggie makes a run for it.  Well, thereís no catching this dog if heís not ready to be caught and since this wasnít the first time he had escaped, I knew the only thing to do was to wait until he comes home.  I call the police and let them know about it in case anyone finds him and calls it in.  

We were planning to go to a blues club, but I couldnít leave with the doggie missing so I ask if he minds if we just stay at my house.  Heís very apologetic about what happened and of course its fine if we stay here.  So we were having a really nice time chatting, listening to music and sipping wine.  At one point we started kissing, JUST KISSING, mind you, everyone is fully clothed, we didnít even go to second base.  All of a sudden, literally out of nowhere, he takes out his you-know-what and starts, um, pleasuring himself.  I seriously almost died.  I didnít know what to do.  I just sort of sat there for a bit trying to comprehend what was happening.  Finally I said ďIím sorry, Iím really not comfortable with this.Ē  To his credit he stopped immediately, but then acted as though nothing happened.  I was so mortified and I didnít know what to say after that.  So I told him I was tired and it was time for bed and thanks so much for coming over.  He called me for a few weeks after that and I did talk to him a few times but I never agreed to go out with him again.  

Diane AKA Traska

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #97 on: June 14, 2011, 05:18:21 PM »
My friends and I still laugh about this and we even have a nickname for this guy that's not appropriate for the forum....

My ex and I were separated and in divorce proceedings and after months of deep sadness and mourning, I decided that maybe I was ready to start dating again.  My friend at work wanted to fix me up with this utterly drop dead gorgeous man she is friends with (I had seen him a few times before because he is a vendor for our company and comes in occasionally to meet with someone here).  I mean, this guy is sooo gorgeous, Iíd have to say he is probably the best looking person I had ever seen in real life.  So anyway, my friend mentions it to him and apparently heís noticed me and thinks Iím hot too so she gives him my phone number.  He calls the next day and we talk for a while and agree that he will pick me up for a date that Saturday.  He seems really nice and normal, though I had heard some pretty wild stories about him from my friend.  Whatever, I have a bit of a wild side myself so I figure I can handle it.

On Saturday evening he arrives at the appointed time, looking absolutely beautiful.  We went to a really nice place for dinner and had a great time.  Conversation is flowing, weíre flirting, itís all going so well that we even go to the bar for another drink after dinner.  When he drops me off, we kiss and it was great.  He calls me a few days later and asks if I want to go out again that weekend and of course I say yes.  

So he comes to pick me up and as Iím inviting him in, my doggie makes a run for it.  Well, thereís no catching this dog if heís not ready to be caught and since this wasnít the first time he had escaped, I knew the only thing to do was to wait until he comes home.  I call the police and let them know about it in case anyone finds him and calls it in.  

We were planning to go to a blues club, but I couldnít leave with the doggie missing so I ask if he minds if we just stay at my house.  Heís very apologetic about what happened and of course its fine if we stay here.  So we were having a really nice time chatting, listening to music and sipping wine.  At one point we started kissing, JUST KISSING, mind you, everyone is fully clothed, we didnít even go to second base.  All of a sudden, literally out of nowhere, he takes out his you-know-what and starts, um, pleasuring himself.  I seriously almost died.  I didnít know what to do.  I just sort of sat there for a bit trying to comprehend what was happening.  Finally I said ďIím sorry, Iím really not comfortable with this.Ē  To his credit he stopped immediately, but then acted as though nothing happened.  I was so mortified and I didnít know what to say after that.  So I told him I was tired and it was time for bed and thanks so much for coming over.  He called me for a few weeks after that and I did talk to him a few times but I never agreed to go out with him again.  


What a jerk.    :D
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Valentines Mommy

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #98 on: June 14, 2011, 05:21:00 PM »
His name wasn't George, was it? If so, I may have gone on a date with him in college.

yankeefan2017

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #99 on: June 14, 2011, 05:24:29 PM »
OK I have one. Actually I have a lot, but I will share this one.

BG: I was a giant and awkward nerd in Junior High School. My mother says that I suffered from Ugly Duckling Syndrome. /BG

When I was in Junior High School I was asked to the 8th grade prom by the cutest guy in school. I was over the moon. I convinced my mother that I needed a new dress for the occasion and to get my hair done. My mother agreed, mostly because she was happy that I was happy.
Prom day arrives and I spend all day getting ready. By the evening I was overflowing with excitement. My mother dropped me off at the venue, 8th graders weren't able to drive and my date and I arranged to meet there. I walked in and as soon as I did it got really quiet. (Can anyone imagine an entire grade hushing at one time. It is eerie) I of course in my tweenage mind thought I looked amazing and was having a total she's all that moment. I walked around to find my date. He was at the refreshment table with his arm around another girl. I walked up and said hello. He looked at me and said "Wow you actually showed up? I can't believe you thought I was serious about taking you." I of course immediately burst into tears and ran outside. I called my mother to come get me and she wasn't even home yet. My sister said she would tell her as soon as she walked in.

The best part? I grew up, became more self confident and even became a professional cheerleader for my local NFL team. I ran into this guy at a game. He immediately said he remembered me from school and asked me out. I had a not so EHell approved moment when I laughed and said "Wow I can't believe you thought I would go out with you."

2littlemonkeys

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #100 on: June 14, 2011, 05:36:58 PM »
My friends and I still laugh about this and we even have a nickname for this guy that's not appropriate for the forum....

My ex and I were separated and in divorce proceedings and after months of deep sadness and mourning, I decided that maybe I was ready to start dating again.  My friend at work wanted to fix me up with this utterly drop dead gorgeous man she is friends with (I had seen him a few times before because he is a vendor for our company and comes in occasionally to meet with someone here).  I mean, this guy is sooo gorgeous, Iíd have to say he is probably the best looking person I had ever seen in real life.  So anyway, my friend mentions it to him and apparently heís noticed me and thinks Iím hot too so she gives him my phone number.  He calls the next day and we talk for a while and agree that he will pick me up for a date that Saturday.  He seems really nice and normal, though I had heard some pretty wild stories about him from my friend.  Whatever, I have a bit of a wild side myself so I figure I can handle it.

On Saturday evening he arrives at the appointed time, looking absolutely beautiful.  We went to a really nice place for dinner and had a great time.  Conversation is flowing, weíre flirting, itís all going so well that we even go to the bar for another drink after dinner.  When he drops me off, we kiss and it was great.  He calls me a few days later and asks if I want to go out again that weekend and of course I say yes.  

So he comes to pick me up and as Iím inviting him in, my doggie makes a run for it.  Well, thereís no catching this dog if heís not ready to be caught and since this wasnít the first time he had escaped, I knew the only thing to do was to wait until he comes home.  I call the police and let them know about it in case anyone finds him and calls it in.  

We were planning to go to a blues club, but I couldnít leave with the doggie missing so I ask if he minds if we just stay at my house.  Heís very apologetic about what happened and of course its fine if we stay here.  So we were having a really nice time chatting, listening to music and sipping wine.  At one point we started kissing, JUST KISSING, mind you, everyone is fully clothed, we didnít even go to second base.  All of a sudden, literally out of nowhere, he takes out his you-know-what and starts, um, pleasuring himself.  I seriously almost died.  I didnít know what to do.  I just sort of sat there for a bit trying to comprehend what was happening.  Finally I said ďIím sorry, Iím really not comfortable with this.Ē  To his credit he stopped immediately, but then acted as though nothing happened.  I was so mortified and I didnít know what to say after that.  So I told him I was tired and it was time for bed and thanks so much for coming over.  He called me for a few weeks after that and I did talk to him a few times but I never agreed to go out with him again.  


What a jerk.    :D

That wasn't nice.  I now have water up my nose.   ;D

gramma dishes

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #101 on: June 14, 2011, 05:38:14 PM »
Yankeefan2017 ~~Given the back story I think you couldn't possibly have spoken a more appropriate sentence.  

And you didn't swear, call him names or anything!!  So you weren't rude.  You just made a simple matter of fact Karma endorsed statement.

magician5

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #102 on: June 14, 2011, 05:47:40 PM »
When this thread was fairly new, I posted my opinion that I may very well have been the "awful guy date" that prompted many stories like this.

After getting this far ... naaaaah! Thanks to all of you ... I FEEL MUCH BETTER ABOUT MYSELF NOW!

Where do these guys come from? How do they survive to dating age without getting the stupid slapped out of 'em?
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MyFamily

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #103 on: June 14, 2011, 05:48:10 PM »
wow...some of these stories are really cruel.  I'm so sad that any of you had to go through that.  Yankeefan, your story made me tear up.

I've heard this story, but don't know the people involved and will fully admit that it may be an urban legand, but the stories about testing dates reminded me of this.

A guy and a girl are out on a date; he is driving.  They are stopped at a red light.  She reaches over, turns off the car and removes the key.  The light turns green and she just sits there holding the key as the cars behind them start honking and getting upset.  The light turns red and she puts the key back in the ignition.  He starts the  car and then asks her why she'd just done that.  Her answer "I wanted to test your character and you passed."  He looks at her, says "well, you failed", turns the car around and drives her home.


"The test of good manners is to be patient with bad ones" - Solomon ibn Gabirol

Carnation

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Re: Worst Date Ever.....
« Reply #104 on: June 14, 2011, 06:01:38 PM »
OK I have one. Actually I have a lot, but I will share this one.

BG: I was a giant and awkward nerd in Junior High School. My mother says that I suffered from Ugly Duckling Syndrome. /BG

When I was in Junior High School I was asked to the 8th grade prom by the cutest guy in school. I was over the moon. I convinced my mother that I needed a new dress for the occasion and to get my hair done. My mother agreed, mostly because she was happy that I was happy.
Prom day arrives and I spend all day getting ready. By the evening I was overflowing with excitement. My mother dropped me off at the venue, 8th graders weren't able to drive and my date and I arranged to meet there. I walked in and as soon as I did it got really quiet. (Can anyone imagine an entire grade hushing at one time. It is eerie) I of course in my tweenage mind thought I looked amazing and was having a total she's all that moment. I walked around to find my date. He was at the refreshment table with his arm around another girl. I walked up and said hello. He looked at me and said "Wow you actually showed up? I can't believe you thought I was serious about taking you." I of course immediately burst into tears and ran outside. I called my mother to come get me and she wasn't even home yet. My sister said she would tell her as soon as she walked in.

The best part? I grew up, became more self confident and even became a professional cheerleader for my local NFL team. I ran into this guy at a game. He immediately said he remembered me from school and asked me out. I had a not so EHell approved moment when I laughed and said "Wow I can't believe you thought I would go out with you."

When I was in  7th grade, I had a boy ask me out in class, right in front of his friends.   I didn't realize until decades later I was the butt of a joke.  Let the record show I was a first class dork.

Funny thing, I didn't want to go out with him and tried to break it to him gently.

In front of his friends. >:D