Please don't tell me to smile.

[Larrabee]

Other person: SMILE!

Me: Dance!

(Other person looks confused.)

Me: Oh, sorry. I thought we were giving each other random, inappropriate orders. 

I love it! 

I really really hope someone tries this on me soon now so I can use this!

[Alida]

Other person: SMILE!

Me: Dance!

(Other person looks confused.)

Me: Oh, sorry. I thought we were giving each other random, inappropriate orders. 

I kind of like this response!

[gramma dishes]

Other person: SMILE!

Me: Dance!

(Other person looks confused.)

Me: Oh, sorry. I thought we were giving each other random, inappropriate orders. 

LOL!     I LOVE this response!

[Mental Magpie]

I've said similar things in other situations, like, "Oh, I thought we were shouting out games!" when people have said bingo followed by me saying Yahtzee.  I never thought to use it with this "command"!

[whiskeytangofoxtrot]

Other person: SMILE!

Me: Dance!

(Other person looks confused.)

Me: Oh, sorry. I thought we were giving each other random, inappropriate orders. 

LOL!     I LOVE this response!

Bursting with "win"!

[Ginya]

Other person: SMILE!

Me: Dance!

(Other person looks confused.)

Me: Oh, sorry. I thought we were giving each other random, inappropriate orders. 

I LOVE IT

Sadly I don't think I could use this at work, but I will remember it for family functions!

[Ms_Shell]

I still haven't figured out the best response to people telling me to smile, because saying a polite "no thanks" will get me called all sorts of unprintable names.  But for the outright staring, a chilly "May I help you?" is usually enough to get them to back down. 

[Lisbeth]

[Evil Lisbeth]If a stranger or someone I don't have a personal relationship with told me to smile, I'd respond: "Give me a reason-don't tell me to smile."  

Or I might say, "My mother was recently murdered-I don't feel like smiling" (even though in real life she's still alive) to such a rude person-they don't need to know the truth, and it might make them think twice about telling random strangers to smile or butting into their business.

Or if they make unsolicited commentary about my purchasing habits, I might respond, "Thanks for your unsolicited commentary" in my sweetest voice coupled with Miss Manners' Icy Glare. [/Evil Lisbeth]

Actually, I might just say to them, "I really don't appreciate being told to smile by people I don't have a personal relationship with-if you don't like my facial expression, find something else to interest you.  Leave me alone."

[Reuth]

Or I might say, "My mother was recently murdered-I don't feel like smiling" (even though in real life she's still alive) to such a rude person-they don't need to know the truth, and it might make them think twice about telling random strangers to smile or butting into their business.

Honestly, when I was younger, my great-grandmother died. My best friend knew her and loved her as well, but wasn't allowed to take the day off from work because it wasn't a family member. So there she was, cashiering all day and trying not to burst into tears, and of course all the customers told her "smile!" and "cheer up!" all day. I don't know why people assume that a complete stranger has no reason to be sad? I've had people tell me, "Smile! It can't be that bad!" And I just wanted to say, "How do you know??"

[Larrabee]

Or I might say, "My mother was recently murdered-I don't feel like smiling" (even though in real life she's still alive) to such a rude person-they don't need to know the truth, and it might make them think twice about telling random strangers to smile or butting into their business.

Honestly, when I was younger, my great-grandmother died. My best friend knew her and loved her as well, but wasn't allowed to take the day off from work because it wasn't a family member. So there she was, cashiering all day and trying not to burst into tears, and of course all the customers told her "smile!" and "cheer up!" all day. I don't know why people assume that a complete stranger has no reason to be sad? I've had people tell me, "Smile! It can't be that bad!" And I just wanted to say, "How do you know??"

Yeah, the charity collector who decided to berate for me not giving by calling me miserable when I was only out in public because I needed to buy something to wear to my best friend's funeral could have done with learning that lesson too.

I hate hate hate "Cheer up it might never happen!", sometimes it already has.

[Reuth]

Other person: SMILE!

Me: Dance!

(Other person looks confused.)

Me: Oh, sorry. I thought we were giving each other random, inappropriate orders. 

I love this idea. I'm afraid if I were in a bad mood, I'd say it too meanly; and otherwise I don't think I could say it with a straight face!

[Bibliophile]

I worked at McD's when I was 15 - on the menu board it said smiles were free.  We'd get lots of comments about wanting a free smile.  I don't think it's a rude greeting.  A bit odd: yes; mildly annoying at times: yes.  I would just hand my money over and go about my day without giving it a second thought.

[Kittymama]

"This IS mah happy face!"  

But I LOVE MorgnsGrl's "Dance!" suggestion! I am so using that next time!

ETA: Anyone staring at me gets a "Quit looking at me!" No exceptions. Do it with an askance look, like they're making you feel paranoid.

[kitty-cat]

My mom is the worst one with the smile. Granted, she's usually doing it to cheer me up, but every now and then it's when I have my normal face on.

She gets the super creepy smile then.

[Asharah]

Heard a story once. A woman was making her first trip to the grocery store following the death of her teenage son. It was heartbreaking for her to see all his favorite foods she used to buy for him. She managed to get through the trip with only a few tears and was loading up the car. A woman walks by and says "Smile my dear, nothing could be that bad." She sat in her car and cried for half an hour.