opinions sought re: unexpected flirting

[wetblanket]

I know this man from the local theatre scene.  The other night I saw him at a show and had some drinks with him and another acquaintance afterwards. This man is married, but his wife was not with him that night.

Here are the flirty things he did:

greeted me with the kiss-both-cheeks thing
said I should "get more naked" when I'm onstage
said next time we're onstage together we should French kiss
when we shook hands goodbye, he kissed my hand

(BTW, I'm not from culture where people kiss each other much - actually we value personal space quite a bit - and so is he, so it's not a cultural thing.)

He's never acted like this before so I don't know if he was joking or what.  I kept thinking "I'll bet his wife wouldn't like this one bit".  When he mentioned us French kissing I said "I really hope you're joking" and he just smiled.

What do you think?  I feel like next time I see him I will have to be on my guard a bit and make sure he gets the right message - which is NO!

[guihong]

Tell him he's being creepy, then get away, i.e. the safety thread.  Or just don't go out with him, if possible.

gui

[Suze]

ohh -- Ick

how many drinks did this 'man' have?

I think if he told me that we should french kiss on stage, I'd tell him that when his WIFE told me it was ok ...........and that being said I think that I would try not to get those parts where it might be a posibility.

keep bringing up his wife in the conversation.

I value personal space as well. I think that I would be more OK with the kiss the hand thing than both cheeks.


repeat --- ICK

[IndianInlaw]

This is sexual harrassment..unwelcome advances.

Avoid him.

[NOVA Lady]

I agree with Suze, bring his wife up as often as you can. Hopefully he'll back off then. And if he doesn't a firm, "No, I am NOT interested. Please do not speak to me about this again." is in order.

Yuck. Nice guy huh?

[Tarendol]

Yeah, I too have to wonder if maybe he had a little too much to drink.

If he keeps it up I would just tell him straight out that you're not interested and you don't think it is appropriate.

[Morty'sCleaningLady]

<<Shudder>>

Don't meet him again without his wife! 

He could just be overly affectionate, but I'm not that comfortable with those actions.  Good luck!  Bring your sweetie.

[hobish]

Yowie ... i am a generally very free & open kind of person ... heck, i have friends who i kiss on the mouth every time i see them & even i think that was over the line!

the 2 cheek kiss? odd, but no big ... until you get to the "more naked" ...ahhh ... euww...and the French kiss suggestion?? Ack!

yep, i agree with the previous posters.

[Bijou]

If I were his wife I would be furious...or grateful for any opportunity to get rid of the jerk.

[Clara Bow]

This is sexual harrassment..unwelcome advances.

Avoid him.

Couldn't have said it better myself. The next time he gets too close, tell him that you feel uncomfortable with his advances and that if he doesn't back off you're going to contact his wife.

[ImperfctMe]

Yeah, this not flirting, it's harassment. Avoid him.

[CreteGirl]

Sounds like an alcohol related incident.  And very inappropriate on his part.  Ick.  I hope he has the good graces to be embarrassed by his behavior.

[MadMadge43]

This is sexual harrassment..unwelcome advances.

Sorry Indian In-law- but this is NOT Sexual Harrassment. It's a creepy guy trying to get a little action on the side and seeing if he can get away with it. If every creepy man that ever tried to hit on a woman that skeeved them out were hit a sexual harrassment claim, they'd all be sued.

If he had been her boss and she had told him it bothered her and he continued doing it making her work place a hostile environment then it would be Sexual Harrassment.

I don't mean to pick nits, but sexual harrassment is a serious issue and it loses it's relevance if everytime somebody speaks to another we start making that accusation. (sorry about the rant  )

[ImperfctMe]

Alright it's not legally harrassment, you're right. It's just really, really bad flirting. Leisure suit Larry had better lines than this guy.

[Venus193]

This is creepy.  I would tell him to keep his distance.