On Dec 13 I replied to someone's online ad and he replied within a few hours. It was quickly clear though that our schedules (as divorced parents with kids) clashed a bit. Realistically, we would only be able to see each other every other weekend if we hit it off unless we "dated" when we had our kids, which is not something I want to do. He seems very nice and admittedly, I'm very picky and he meets my precursory list of criteria. In my experience having only every other weekend available is fairly common.
Of course, with it being right before Christmas, neither of us made mention of meeting the first 2 weekends because of the holidays. Then he was out of town until 1/5. Then communication slowed down. He made no mention of trying to meet. I thought perhaps he had his children the first weekend he was home, so I didn't worry about it. On Sunday 1/11 I sent him a message asking how his weekend was and telling him I was hoping we would finally be able to meet that upcoming weekend (1/17). To me this was kind of a "sh** or get off the pot" message. I did not hear back from him and deleted our communications.
On 1/22 he replied finally and apologized for not being in contact, gave excuses, chatted about what he's been up to, asked me some questions, and so on including indicating he wanted to meet but not being specific (Ie: can we meet for coffee on sat morning?). On 1/23 he sent another message (I had not replied) asking how I was, and so on.
I was and am very torn because I feel like he dropped the ball and if this is how he treats someone he's trying to impress, then I'm not going to enjoy being in a relationship with him. I chatted with a (male) friend who convinced me to reply and give it one more chance, seeing as how he *seems* like a nice guy. So I replied, saying I was unsure hot to reply after such a long silence, and listing 10 things that I thought happened to him over the past 2 weeks. It was a light tongue in cheek message ala David Letterman that referenced some things we had talked about and was meant to convey that it had been way too long between messages.
I did not hear back from him. I deleted our communications again, 48 hours after my message. This morning I had another message from him (so 3 1/2 days later), he thought my list was hilarious. He wonders if it had really been that long, or if some of his messages hadn't got to me, and asking vaguely about meeting.
Again, I'm torn. He does seem nice. He has a great sense of humor and he asks me questions that indicate he's listening and interested. However, I can't imagine any person who has time for dating that can't manage to reply to a message within 24 hours these days.
Do I just not reply because it's an indication of how he'll be?
Do I come right out and tell him "taking 3 days to reply to a message isn't ok"?
I'm at a loss for how to reply when I think it's been dropped, lol!
(he works a 9-5 business job that involves some travel, works out, and has 50% custody of his children)