Author Topic: Well played, Shawna.  (Read 14808 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Barb3000

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 231
Re: Well played, Shawna.
« Reply #15 on: May 26, 2012, 01:38:30 PM »
When I used to take public transportation I always seemed to attract this type. Guess I had a sympathetic face.

 Or maybe because I was sympathetic. I remember one non-crazy guy who made a simple, innocuous remark to a woman on the subway and she completely ignored him. I felt so bad for him that I answered him as if he had been talking to me ( I was next to her) and we had a nice conversation.

DH's mom, who had dementia, would go on the bus with her daughter and as she was leaving, would turn and announce in a loud voice, "I want everyone to have a wonderful, wonderful day!"

SIL would cringe but I bet she made a lot of people smile.

Mental Magpie

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4839
  • ...for the dark side looks back.
Re: Well played, Shawna.
« Reply #16 on: May 27, 2012, 10:47:13 PM »
When I used to take public transportation I always seemed to attract this type. Guess I had a sympathetic face.

 Or maybe because I was sympathetic. I remember one non-crazy guy who made a simple, innocuous remark to a woman on the subway and she completely ignored him. I felt so bad for him that I answered him as if he had been talking to me ( I was next to her) and we had a nice conversation.

DH's mom, who had dementia, would go on the bus with her daughter and as she was leaving, would turn and announce in a loud voice, "I want everyone to have a wonderful, wonderful day!"

SIL would cringe but I bet she made a lot of people smile.

I probably would have shouted back to her, "You, too!  Thanks for the smile!" and would have spent the rest of the day telling everyone about the really nice lady on the bus.
The problem with choosing the lesser of two evils is that you're still choosing evil.

MrsCrazyPete

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 578
Re: Well played, Shawna.
« Reply #17 on: June 09, 2012, 07:11:27 AM »
My grandma used to ride the Greyhound bus back and forth from Cincinnati to Cleveland to visit our family, and she attracted these kind of people. The most memorable was the young man who sat across the aisle from her one trip. He had a baby and spent much of the time rocking it and cooing at it. At one point he looked at his watch and looked alarmed. He asked if my grandma would hold Danny (the baby) for a minute while he did something and she said she would. He laid Danny in her arms and went back to his seat. He started digging around in his bag. Grandma pulled back part of Danny's blanket and discovered it was a plastic (though realistic) baby doll! At that point the young man came back to her and said "Thanks for holding him; I feel so much better now!" She looked up and saw that he had hung an empty tuna fish can from each ear!

He spent the rest of the trip talking about Danny, all while tuna fish cans hung over his ears!
Sell crazy somewhere else, we're all stocked up here.

wheeitsme

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3925
Re: Well played, Shawna.
« Reply #18 on: June 09, 2012, 10:06:32 PM »
I've worked around people with mental disabilities.  Charles sounds very much like someone like that.  Very gregarious and wanting to please.  Offering the bear that he was taking to someone else is very much like some of those folks I've met. Shawna was so very nice.  :D 

blueyzca01

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 339
Re: Well played, Shawna.
« Reply #19 on: June 21, 2012, 02:07:09 PM »
Actually, has anyone read The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker?  It’s directed mainly to women and how we can keep ourselves safe, from violent coworkers to potential mates.

This story seems to be a great mirror of a story that Gavin tells about a guy trying to pick up a young woman on an airplane.  The Guy in The Book (TGITB) was engaging the woman in conversation, giving her compliments, had props (like Charles with the bear and the egg timer), and asked her out.  Gavin recognized the classic symptoms of a Bad Guy and when TGITB got up to use the lavatory, he warned the woman that TGITB was not a good guy, that he would try to give her a ride from the airport, and that she should absolutely not leave with him. 
The events that happened after they arrived at the airport unfolded just as Gavin predicted.

Shawna really had no duty to be polite to Charles, just direct and firm.

Women need to stop equating “nice” with “not rude.” You can be a perfectly nice woman, and maybe you might need to be rude to someone to keep yourself safe.
No one ever says, "Why me?!?!" when something good happens.

Bethalize

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4663
    • Toxic People Survival Checklist
Re: Well played, Shawna.
« Reply #20 on: June 21, 2012, 02:23:04 PM »
Actually, has anyone read The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker? 

Quite a few people on eHell have read this book, myself included. There has been a lot of debate. Some people felt it's not an entirely wonderful book and a little simplistic in places, but most people regard the first couple of chapters about listening to your instincts and recognising when someone is manipulating as very worth reading. For a while it was going to join cash bars, tipping and shoes in the house as a hot button topic!