Category: Rugrats

This is more of an inquiry as to what a proper, polite response would be in this scenario.

My husband and I have elected not to find out the sex of our baby as we wish for it to be a surprise.  Our families respect that so no drama there.

The issue stems from the fact that certain family members are rather pushy about knowing what our preferred “boy name” and “girl name” are.  Hubby and I have been kicking around name ideas for both sexes among ourselves but nothing has been selected and we feel our discussions on the subject are a private matter.  Besides, just because we select a name doesn’t mean it will “suit” the baby once he/she arrives. 

My question is this: What is a polite way to deflect/put a stop to the constant inquires about our private discussions?

If it was something that happened once or twice it wouldn’t be that big of a deal but its getting to the point where we don’t want to attend any family event because its near constant nagging.  It’s hubby and I’s opinion that no one is entitled to that information.  We have so far been able to deflect the question(s) but are looking for a firm response so we can finally put an end to this. 

Any help is greatly appreciated! 0117-19

“The baby hasn’t told us his/her name yet. Once introduced, I’m sure we’ll be informed of that information.”

I am hoping to get some advice on the polite thing to do.

I have 2 elementary school age kids, who ride on a school bus daily. They have plenty of friends in general and their play dates fall in one of two types. School friends are usually dropped off or picked up by us from school and their parents collect them some time later. Occasionally the parents stay for a a bit to chat with us, but these dates are predominantly kids only. For our family friends usually the mother or the father stays – so both kids and parents have time with their respective friends (these happen more often on weekends or evenings when both families have finished work). I should also say that with school friends we host play dates probably twice as much as we send our kids somewhere. We like hosting and having the kids play at home is no trouble at all. My husband and I both work from home and kids that age do not need much supervision any more, one of us can step out to help and come back to our work.

One exception is a neighborhood girl of similar age to my kids. Her house is on the way to our home from the school bus and my kids have fallen into the habit of stopping there for a half hour play date a couple of times a week. This is always by invitation from the girl and her sitter, actually the invitation is extended almost daily, but my kids have sports after school some days, so not all days work. My impression is that it’s easier for the sitter if the girl has company, the kids have fun, and since the invitations keep coming (often the sitter will stop by in advance to get my permission to have them come over) it’s probably mutually beneficial. The mother of the girl has been to our house once staying over a birthday party and knows our kids too, no problems from her and she is at work during these dates anyway. I have recently made my children bring some snacks to share since I noticed they often get treating to snacks at the other place.

My dilemma is to what extent can I have this going on without reciprocating. As I mentioned above we host often and we find kids no trouble. The issue is that this kid comes with a sitter. We have invited them a couple of times and the lady comes as well and stays. It’s a bit awkward, since either we have to stop working for the whole time and chat with her, or send her join the kids in basement or backyard wherever they are playing, which seems impolite. It would be incredibly easier if she would be willing to drop off the girl and collect her later, but I haven’t dared suggest that. Don’t get me wrong, nothing against her personally, but this is still during the work day for us and not convenient.

What is the proper thing to do? Keep going as now, extend invitation occasionally and just bear the awkwardness, ask the sitter to do drop off? 0322-17

What would you do in this situation?

Ifyou think saying something will have any effect on the situation, watch this:

While the scenario is different, it’s a baby shrieking in distress as opposed to a toddler shrieking for the sheer fun of it, the surrounding diners don’t appear to be bothered by the disruption.

Saying something to the parents never works. Never. It’s a recipe for even more drama. I’ve concluded that the only option is to ask the manager to move you to a table farther away, if possible. The silent act of having your entire meal packed up and moved does speak volumes that you do not prefer to be in close proximity to that much noise, distraction and chaos.

It was still about 2 weeks to Halloween, but we had some very early trick or treater’s apparently.

We live on a dead end street and have been here about a year. We mostly keep to ourselves but say hello if we take our elderly dog for a walk up the street. There are several families with children who run up and down the street playing at each others homes, but they have always been polite and don’t even get too loud when they are outside. All in all, its a nice, quiet place.

The other evening however we met some strange neighbor children. It was a nice day so we had the windows and doors open (screen door closed and locked) so our cats could enjoy the outdoors from the safety of inside the house. My sister and I were watching TV in the front room when suddenly two young girls appeared on our porch and peered in our screen door. The older was about 13 and the younger maybe 10 at the most.

“Do you have any candy?” The older one asks without so much as a hello. We don’t know these kids and we have maybe seen them before but as I said, we keep to ourselves.

We stare dumbfounded at the pair and my sister stammers that no we do not. The girl points to a bag of M&Ms on the table. Now this bag is obviously open. My sister, having recovered more now, tells the duo that while she did forget about those, we don’t even know the girls, nor their parents or if their mother would even want them to have candy.

The two girls run off and we just stare at each other trying to figure out what just happened, but that’s not even the end! The older girl returns just as quickly and happily announces their mom said its OK.

At this point our dog woke up and, realizing someone is at the door, starts barking. She is mostly blind and near entirely deaf so its hard to get her to stop once she starts so I’m trying to quiet the dog while my sister tells the girls again we don’t even know them nor their mother and are not going to just give them candy. The girl steps off the porch again and calls for her mom to come over to tell us its OK for her to have our candy. Fortunately Mom was too busy and told her to come back to the house and the girl yelled “Never mind!” as she ran home finally for good. We decided the cats had had enough fresh air and closed the door and had a laugh once our dog went back to sleep. We still do not know any of their names. 1020-17