Etiquette Hell = Where the ill-mannered deserve to go

Contents

Main Page/Home
 

The Faux Pas Archives
Wedding Etiquette

Bridesmaids and Beastmen
Bridal Showers
Bridezillas and Groomonsters
Faux Pas of the Year
Gimme, Gimme, Gimme
Guests From Hell
Tacky Invitations
Ooops!
Wedding Rugrats
Just Plain Tacky
Tacky Toasts
Thank You Notes From Hell
Tacky Vendors
Wedding From Hell
Wicked Witches of the Wedding
Perfect Bride
Bridesmaid Dress Incinerator

 

 

Everyday Etiquette

Baby Showers
The Dating Game
Ooops! Foot in Mouth Disease
Funeral Etiquette
Gimme Hell
Guests
Holiday Hell
Neighbors
Just Plain Tacky
It's all Relatives
Every Day RugRats
Road Rage

Business Etiquette

Bad Business Etiquette
Co-workers
Merchants of Etiquette Hell
Bad Bosses
Customers

Faux Pas of the Year

 

Web


EtiquetteHell.com

 

Press Room/Contact

 

Co-Workers or Cow-Orkers or Co-Irkers?

Jan-Jun 2003 Archive
Jul-Dec 2003 Archive
Jan - Jun 2004 Archive
Jul-Dec 2004 Archive


 

Well, after spending hours reading your site, I felt compelled to write about an incident that happened at my job. Not a big deal, but the lack of etiquette all around was horrible.

My company has a few large pot-luck lunches throughout the year. The Accounting & Payroll departments do all the cooking and then we (accounting & payroll) meet with the exec's in their main board room to eat. Now these exec's, who make a ton of money, in no way contribute to these lunches. They show up, eat, and then are gone, with nary a "thank you" or a helping hand to assist with the clean up. In addition, they do not even invite their own receptionist (who I'll call "Cindy") to participate, forcing her to endure our partying two feet from her office. After the last party, I felt bad for "Cindy", as when I was leaving I noticed her eating a pretty bare turkey sandwich. 

Now, because my boss and other exec's attend these "functions", I try to make something really good. As I consider myself a pretty good chef, I slaved the day before to make a huge tiramisu. Now, anyone who has made a tiramisu knows, it costs upwards of $30-$45 to make one when you factor in the cheese, wine, and liquor, and you must work hard to ensure they're not soggy and gross. Anyway, I had about 1/2 of the cake left as there were many desserts brought that day, and I asked "Cindy" if she would like a piece of cake. She replied she would love some so I let her cut a large slice. Later that day, I see "Cindy" and she says the cake was so good she wanted the recipe. I said ok, even though I really don't like to give out my recipes. 

During the next week, I was out sick and just didn't have time to type up the recipe. When I retuned to work, "Cindy" stops me in the hall to enquire about "her" recipe. I told her I hadn't forgotten but just hadn't had time. She replied, in a tone conveying her great annoyance, that it was ok, but I needed to hurry up. Ignoring *my* annoyance, I told her I would get it to her ASAP. The next day, I typed the recipe and hand delivered it to her office. Her reply? "Hmph, well, it's about time". I just stared for a second then walked away, trying not to turn back and rip the damn thing out of her hands. Oh, and what happened to the rest of the cake? When I returned to my department the day of the party, I asked the two people who hadn't gone if they'd like a piece. They proceeded to split the rest of the cake between themselves to "take home to their husbands", leaving me with nothing to bring home to my family. Sigh…

Co-workers0113-05


 

 Several months ago, I started a new job in the food service industry.  I've worked as a cook for 22 years in every kind of restaurant from roadside diners to five star showcases.  I'm a cook as opposed to a chef, but I try to be the best I can be at my job.   I got along famously with every one of my new co-workers but for one - a young man named, well, I'll call him Grody.  He was 20 years old and a real pickle and vinegar type - whatever you had done or could do, he did it first, better, faster, and more often.  All right, I've worked with these type before.  Generally, if you just let them do everything they think they want to, they burn out rather quickly, either quitting and moving on or calming down and actually mellowing into a good cook.   Grody, on the other hand:   Burned himself grabbing a pan away from me while I was taking it to the sink - after I'd said "Hot!" he still pulled it out of my hand saying "I don't have time to wait to get it back."  There are 6 other pans exactly the same size hanging on the rack.   Hurt his back wrestling a box of eggs out of my arms - then dropping it on the floor.  Yay, an entire case (12 flats of 36 eggs each) shattered because "She can't carry that much."  Though I can haul an 85 pound trash can out to the dumpster without his 'help'.   

But the capper that sent me looking for another job (and finding one at a pay raise and better hours):  I was hanging tickets on the 'rack'.  When working a wheel by yourself, there is no hard and fast rule about whether they go from right to left or left to right.  Most people hang them left to right, because they're right handed.  I hang right to left because I'm a lefty.  He stomps up, gets in my way trying to read the tickets, then pulls them down and begins rearranging them because "they're backwards".   "Nobody reads right to left unless they're reading Chinese," he tells me. "Or Hebrew," I tell him through gritted teeth. "Well, who cares?  Hitler killed all the f****** Jews anyway."   I walked off the line, punched out and left. I'm Jewish.     

Co-workers0202-05


 

I work for a computer consulting firm, and a new project was in the works (traveling to their client's sites all over the country upgrading their computers).

During the first meeting that included all people selected for the project, one of my coworkers (who obviously lacks some social skills) asks a question about travel time (if travel hours would count toward overtime). Our project manager told him no, as it's against company policy and possibly employment law. So he attempted to clarify the question to better understand it. He phrased his question like this: "Okay, so we'll get only for travel time, and not time and a half?"

Unfortunately, the rate he quoted was higher than what some of the other equally qualified people had negotiated. When the meeting is over, our project manager was accosted by several people, with questions about why this person was making more than them.

Needless to say, the coworker was fired.

I've worked several jobs, some of which had agreements not to disclose salary information written into the contract. One particular employer fired 5 people (the entire night shift) because one person discovered that we had access to payroll data, didn't report it to upper management, and decided to look up the salary of our boss, our coworkers, etc. Since no one on the night shift told management, and the "hacker" had shared the information with them, they were all fired.

Why do people seem to think discussing their pay rate is perfectly acceptable and polite? It never is, even if it's not an offense that results in immediate termination under your contract. All it can do is cause jealousy, which interferes with their work.

Co-workers0301-05


 

This story is about a male co-worker whom I'll call Stan.   Stan is a big, soft-spoken, shy man.  When he first started working at the ABC Company, he was quite overweight. He decided to do something about it, and he joined Weight Watchers.  "Good for him," I thought.  I've battled a weight problem all my life, and I know how tough it is.  Weight Watchers did the trick for him - he lost quite a bit of weight. I know, because he gave me frequent updates on his progress.  I wasn't all that interested, to be honest, but I could understand that he was proud of his achievement and wanted to share.   I recently started putting a jar of candy on my desk - M&Ms, that sort of thing.  The idea is that anyone can help him/herself.  Stan turned into my biggest "customer", which surprised me somewhat - he'd worked so hard to lose the weight, and yet here he was stuffing himself with candy.   After about a month, he suddenly announced to me that he wasn't going to eat my candy anymore, because he was putting weight back on.  Fair enough.  "It's not your fault," he assured me.  "It's me.  Please don't take it personally."  I already knew it wasn't my fault, and I wasn't taking it personally, but I accepted his comments with good grace and wished him luck.   Well, two days later he was back helping himself to the candy.  Then, a few days after that, he gave me the "I'm giving up candy, it's not your fault, don't take it personally" speech again. 

Lather, rinse, repeat at least five more times over the next few weeks.      By this point, I was getting frustrated and irritated with Stan.  We'd never been friends, but his constant yo-yo dieting and unnecessary assurances of how it wasn't my fault were really getting on my nerves.    Lent arrived, and a friend of mine decided to give up alcohol for the duration.  I'm not Catholic, and I've never observed Lent, but I decided to do something similar.  My big weakness is potato chips, so I decided to give those up.   I have a whiteboard at my desk, and after ten chip-less days I proudly wrote "CHIP-FREE FOR 10 DAYS!" on it.    Stan came by to get some candy (surprise!) and saw my whiteboard.  Smirking, he pointed at it and said "We'll see."  Stung, I said "It's been ten days.  That's pretty good for me."  Shaking his head, he repeated "We'll see" and walked off, munching his candy.   I was furious.  Who was he to tell me I couldn't give up chips for Lent when he was incapable of giving up candy for more than two days?  (Incidentally, it's been four weeks, and I'm still chip-free. So there, Stan!)  

Co-workers0311-05


I work in a DoD test facility running the computer operations.  A very simple but repetitive job, and there are only 3 of us in this work center.  One of my co-workers is the most difficult person I’ve ever worked with; I’ll call him “B.”  He’s been there 2 years longer than me, 7 years with the job altogether.  “B’s” major problem is he’s hypersensitive.  He constantly makes careless mistakes, which we have to correct, and then he gets all bent out of shape when we tell him about it.  Acts as if it’s not his fault.  Then, he gets extremely petty and splits hairs constantly about every little thing—I’m assuming it’s his way of gaining a little bit of power.  And either way, you can never win with the guy.  If I find something to do, “B” hovers over me and wants to know what I’m doing.  If “B” is tasked with something, he gets all huffy and expects everyone to help him.  “B” constantly complains that nobody shares information with him, nobody trains him.  Well, why should we?  Everything you say to him goes in one ear and out the other…doesn’t make the effort to learn or retain the information…it’s like he expects to be spoon fed and have his hand held the rest of his life.  And on top of that, he’s supposedly devoutly religious, but you’d never know if by his actions.  “B” argues on the phone with his wife loudly, he is rude, gets offended easily, is a hypocrite, is jealous of everyone around him, and he is paranoid of everything. 

Co-workers0407-05


 

We all know that some people are still saps for every email scam that comes along, but this was my favorite example of that. I worked in an office with 500 people. The IT department and the management made it clear that employees were not to send mass forwards of emails to the people at the office and waste everyone's time. (A joke sent to a couple of friends wasn't frowned on; you just had to use your discretion.) One day, one of the secretaries sent out that email scam that says "If you forward this message, Bill Gates will send you a nickel for every email address you send it to." To every person in the firm, all the way up the chairman. But this was the kicker: she sent it by using the company's internal "All Firm" email address. So not only was she exposed as being stupid enough to believe one of the oldest scams in internet history in front of the entire firm, even if the scam HAD been true, her stupidity meant she would have received...one nickel, for the one firm email address she sent the message to.

Co-workers0407-05


 

During my college years of the late 80s - early 90s, I worked as an unarmed security guard, also known as a "rent-a-cop".  We worked for a company which in turn would provide our services to different businesses.  Basically, we're an insurance write-off.  During the day, I might have basic receptionist duties.  During swing or grave shifts, my job was to walk around once an hour, note that the walls aren't currently aflame, and make another trip on the next hour to ensure they still haven't caught fire yet.  It was the perfect student job, because you had plenty of time (and even permission) to do homework on shift, and I preferred swing because it matched my sleep and class schedules.

At one time, I was assigned the role of shift supervisor.  Of course, the following event had to happen on my first day....

The company I worked at was one that had five or six different buildings to monitor, so there would be a guard assigned to each one, and every hour they'd call in to me for their check-ins.  One guard was brand new.  Not only was it his first day on the job, but it was his first day as a security guard, period. And so after he checked in, I took a short walk to his building to make sure he was doing all right.  When I got there, I noticed a bass line coming through the wall of the reception area, and my new partner looked a bit ill at ease.  Listening to music on the swing shift was perfectly fine, since you're usually alone anyway, but this sure wasn't coming from his radio. Curious, I asked him what was going on, and he said some of the employees were having a party in one of the electronics labs, and that they claimed to have permission.  Warning sirens went off in my head: for obvious reasons there was no eating or drinking allowed in any of said labs. 

As I led my new partner closer to the suspect lab, I also heard some guys laughing.  As we opened the door to the lab, the music was pretty loud (though not deafening), and in said lab we find four guys.  All these men are pretty big compared to me (a well-proportioned size 14, but only 5'3") and my partner (who may have been about 6' tall, but was thin as a rail).  All of them are also drinking beer, and from the empties on the counter it looks like they've gone through two each by now.  No wonder my partner was so worried.  I'm a little concerned, too; security guards have no temporal powers whatsoever, no matter what they tell you.  If things went bad, we would have to call for the real police like any other citizen, and we'd be easy to overpower.

But the flushed foursome are in a good mood, they aren't obviously drunk yet, and as a relatively small woman I don't pose a threat to them, so I figure I might be able to charm our way out of this.  All smiles, I come in, say hi, ask if they have permission to have open containers of liquid in the lab.  Why, of course they do!  From the VP, no  less!  (Never mind that the chances of them getting permission from the company's Vice President to have a beer party in an electronics lab after hours are roughly equivalent to the chances of pigs flying out my rectal orifice.)

But, hey, it's great that they have such a close relationship with the VP.  All I have to do is see the written permission, and everything's fine.  Oh, dear, you don't have written permission?  Gee, guys, I'm afraid that if you don't have something written, my boss won't accept it, and I'm really sorry, but I could lose my job over this....  My pleas for their aid are acceptable, they agree to clean things up and go, everyone saves face, and my partner and I go about with rounds for the rest of the building.

We come back to the lab about 10 minutes later.  Boom box is gone, men are gone, place is cleaned up, all evidence scrubbed.  Or is it?  Witness:

1)  Two bottles of beer in the waste basket. 2)  Four fuzzy B+W Polaroids of themselves on the table, taken with one of the cameras in the lab.  One of the guys in his photo was even holding up his own employee badge.  I. KID.  YOU.  NOT.

Silently thanking God for the fact these guys were peaceful, if dumb as posts, I take the evidence back, write my Daily Action Report (the ubiquitous DAR), and call my supervisor to let him know where the evidence will be.  I stapled the photos and the twice-wrapped bottles of beer to the DAR as best I could, as I had the feeling the evidence was going to be very important.  I listed the incident as kind of a "non-issue".  Everyone was friendly, no one was confrontational, no damage was done, etc.

Fast forward a couple days.  I'm coming in to work after my scheduled day off, taking over from my supervisor (who has the shift before me).  He fills me in on what happened the day after my report.  First thing in the morning the fabulous foursome went to their manager.  They complained bitterly that I was abusive, aggressive, and nasty.  I threw my weight around. They were never in the lab, they were just doing their work in their cubes, and I wouldn't let them finish.  All four of them had the same stories and bad mouthed me to no end (must've taken them all night to make sure their stories meshed so well).  Basically, to save their butts they were doing a pre-emptive strike on my credibility, attempting to get me fired (or at least reassigned).

Then their manager not only produced my DAR, but the two bottles of beer and four (blurry, but still recognizable) B+W Polaroids that they so helpfully left behind.  Said manager's response was "do it again and you're fired".  Apparently, the four were notorious for this kind of behavior, and though they had rehearsed their story to perfection for a united, cohesive front, the physical evidence was a bit much for them to BS their way out of.

I have no idea if they stayed at that company very long after that: working swing means not seeing regular employees very much.  But if this kind of behavior is any indication, I have the feeling they met a grizzly downsized fate once the Dot Com bubble burst....

Co-workers0525-05


Oh the joys of immature co-workers.  I must first start this story with a little background on myself.  Most importantly being that I have severely painful back condition.  There are just some days that I can't move, can't sit up, can't do anything, and must stay home from work.  Recently, I went through one such spell.  I missed three days of work.  I spent those three days plus the following weekend in utter pain and agony.  Sadly, one of the days that I missed, I had promised to cover the front desk phones for our office receptionist for her afternoon off.  I do this quite frequently, and without complaint, as I had her position once and know how hard it is to find coverage.  But, as I said, I was out of the office due to my condition.  Now, the whole office was already aware of my problem, they could hardly miss it considering I walk with a severe limp about 50% of the time.  In my absence, the receptionist asked another co-worker, who holds the same position as myself, to cover her.  Okay, let us refresh.  I am gone for 3 days, and my counterpart is now doing the work of two during one of our busiest seasons.  No, terribly sorry, she could not cover the phones, our boss would not allow it.  When I came back from work, I noticed the rather chilly reception I received, but thought nothing of it, chalking it to the receptionist having a bad day.  We were on extremely friendly terms, so I wasn't worried.  But the next day I found out that the receptionist is not talking to me, or my counterpart because we didn't cover the phones.  Unbelievable!  Some people can be so childish.  And yet, she still expects me to cover the phones for her in the future.  Yes, big incentive to help her out when she snubs me because of an illness.

Co-workers0621-05


 

I spent 10 years working at a state university in a small office. I was the only "clerical" person in our office, as I was the department secretary.

A new software system was instituted to handle our payroll and accounting systems, and all of the clerical staff spent many hours in training learning how to use it. My supervisor, "M," was only to attend one short afternoon course on the payroll system, as it was directly against university policy to have employees enter their own timesheets. M decided she was too busy to attend the course, so I had no choice but to enter my own timesheet into the system. I was in a "damned if you do, damned if you don't" situation because I knew if I ratted M out to our Personnel office she would become angry and take it out on me; if I didn't, I knew somehow this would all come back to bite me in the butt.

And just that happened. One afternoon I was called into her office with another supervisor, "S," and accused of defrauding and stealing from the university because I had not entered in some vacation time I had taken. M said she didn't have time to be meeting with me over something like this and told me how much of an imposition this whole situation was to her. I was yelled at and basically called a liar. Crying and scared for my job, I told them both that if I had made a mistake that it was an honest one. I had bitten my fingernails to the nubs and noticed they were bleeding. Our meeting was dismissed and I was sent back to my desk, visibly shaken, to finish a project I'd been working on.

Later in the day the director of the department, "B," came out to tell me that upon further investigation (no doubt to see if they had grounds to fire me) they had uncovered a mistake in my vacation balance and found out that it was Payroll's error. I never received an apology from either of the two supervisors in the meeting; instead the director told me that from that point on that M would stand over my shoulder and observe me as I entered my own time. (She never did attend the training to enter timesheets herself.)

That incident, along with many others and the fact that 1/3 of the 24 employees in the department are related to each other, caused me to leave after 10 years. I'll never work a government job again.

 

Co-workers0630-05


 

This event happened over 10 years ago but I still have to pick my jaw off the floor every time I think about.

Let's set up the story first: The year was 1994. I was 21 years old and slaving away at a fast food place. Being a fast food place, we got our fair share of goofball teenage workers. Anyways, that particular day happened to be a holiday (I can't remember which one) and no school for the teenagers. And that day we had two people call in sick and NO ONE would come in to cover their shifts. That left us a grand total of FOUR people to cover the lunch rush--Two people for the front registers, one for the grill and another for the drive thru. We got creamed!! But somehow we made it through.

Cut to about 1:30 or 2pm, we are cleaning up from the lunchtime rush when "Mike" comes waltzing in. "Mike" is one of our teenage workers. He usually works nights so I didn't really see him all that often. But "Mike" is a bit on the scuzzy side--the kind of guy who thinks underage drinking and smoking pot is "so cool". He also brought an entourage of his equally scuzzy friends. "Mike" coming in when he 'couldn't' come in to cover a shift when we really needed help was bad enough, but what happened next was truly astonishing. "Mike" asked me (I was 21) and the shift manager on duty (also 21) to leave and go get him and his friends (all underage) some beer!!! Unbelievable! Like we were just going to drop everything and break the law for him while we were on the clock! The manager told "Mike" he could clock in and help or get the hell out. "Mike" didn't work there much longer.

Co-workers0422-05


 

To make a very long story shorter, I will give you a brief overview of Edda, our employee from Hell. Edda is a 35 year old single woman who has the biggest chip on her shoulder. After being laid off from her last job, and collecting unemployment for a year, she applied for a receptionist position at my company. At first I was hesitant to hire her, as her appearance was a cross between trailer trash and 80's/90's punk rocker, and had hair like Edward Scissorhands. She appeared to be somewhat congenial, as a last resort we hired her as she appeared to be the better of the only 2 candidates. Little did we know?.

Over time we came to learn that she was probably the most bitter, selfish, clueless person I have ever met. She is a self proclaimed Christian but fails miserably to exude that. Rather she blames and judges everyone and everything around her. At 35, she has stated that she is mad at God for allowing her to still be single!!! She refuses to accept more responsibility and duties in her position (which could offer her more money), and then complains that she doesn't make enough money, yet she also leaves early often and calls in "sick" about 3 times a month, arrives late and leaves early. She is rude to other employees and customers, and has never accepted that when she is called on it. She thinks there is a conspiracy here as well, as she thinks that people steal files and paperwork of her desk. She will rant and rave and blame, and point fingers and then when she finds them (where she left them) she just goes on about her day with no apologies for yelling accusing others. She makes vendors and clients uncomfortable by asking them out and to go do stuff together after work. If you ask her a questions about something that she doesn't really care about, she says "I don't know I never saw that" or " I have no idea, that wasn't my job." She lets off exasperated sighs every 5 minutes, and her job is the least stressful here. She's merely a secretary.

But the situation that takes the cake is this: One day Edda arrived late because her curling iron broke. She was complaining about it all day. I told her that I thought I had an extra one she could use, and offered it to her. I told her I would bring it the next day. That evening a family member of mine passed away. Edda called me and left a voicemail stating ?I need you to bring the curling iron tomorrow?, that night also. I came to work the next day just to get a few things, and then would be returning to my family to assist in funeral preparations. Being that I was so flustered and had other things on my mind, I forgot to bring the curling iron. As soon as walked into the office the next day, she bombarded me and asked me about the curling iron. I apologetically said I had forgotten it. She huffed and puffed and said in a foul manner ?I really needed you to bring curling iron, today, I can't do my hair with out it.?

I had to leave then to get to my family. She thought I was coming back and called me about 1 hour later and said ?Can you bring the curling iron when you come back?? I told her no because I wasn't coming back I was going to plan a funeral. She hung up on me. She then started complaining to our co-workers that I was a flake, and if someone says they are going to do someone a favor then they have to do it. She continued to complain about this for the next 2 days while I was out. Even though my co-workers tried to explain that I was just overwhelmed with the funeral and forgot. But Edda insisted that I was rude and inconsiderate as she really needed the curling iron. She even went as far as going to a local store and complaining to my neighbor that I was a flake, and selfish.

That may seem like enough show that she has no etiquette or professionalism. But it gets better. When I returned from being off for 2 days, she did not speak to me. I would ask her questions and she would only shrug or say yes or no. I eventually had to remind her that I was her boss and she needed to be responsive to me. When I asked my co-workers what the deal was they told me about how she complained every hour about the curling iron. Later that month, she was up for an evaluation. As usual I stated that she needed to improve her very negative attitude along with several other areas she needed to work on. I also stated that it wouldn't hurt her to be friendlier in the office. She then stated ?I have personal issues with you that make me unable to be nice.? Wouldn't you know it, she was talking about what we now refer to as ?the curling iron incident?

Needless to say she has been denied a raise during her last 2 evaluations for failure to improve her awful, selfish, begrudging attitude. But she continues to blame everyone else but herself.

Co-workers0518-05


 

At my office, the receptionist, “BJ,” is incredibly rude. I should have learned this early on, but after 4 years, she still manages to shock me with her rudeness. When I had been working there for about 6 months, she discovered that I was living with, but not yet married to, Mason (we are now married). We were outside after lunch, with several other people and she asked me, totally off the subject, “Doesn’t your mother mind you being shacked up?” Later I find out that she is having an affair with a married man. I wish I was rude enough to ask her if her lover’s wife minds…

Co-workers0117-05


 

  I was working at a large corporation on the east coast and I was selected for a special project. My boss had 12 people under her control, eight "regular" workers and four of us working on the special project. The boss was often very vocal about how special and better we four were in comparison to the regular workers. I was a late comer to the project, replacing someone who was now one of the lesser regular workers. Two of my fellow project workers, Mary and Karen, were both very very nasty to me. They made it very clear that I was there on their sufferance and that they could get me fired. Karen in particular made it very clear that she was our boss's friend and the project leader's friend and she was dating a man who was also highly placed in the company. So this was awkward to begin with, and not helped by the fact that these two really enjoyed flaunting the project privileges in the faces of the regular workers. (The boss seemed to either ignore or subtly encourage this behavior.)   

Three months down the road, Karen announces that she is pregnant by her boyfriend. The boyfriend has been moved to a different area as their relationship can no longer be ignored. Then less than a week later, Mary also announces that she is pregnant. Karen immediately begins suggesting that Mary got pregnant to "one up" her. I ask Karen, already appalled that she has publicly announced that not only is she dating a higher up (not expressly forbidden since he wasn't her direct supervisor but still pretty gauche) but that she is pregnant out of wedlock (yeah, not my business except that she keeps talking about it to me, someone she doesn't even like) if she and Harvey will be getting married before the baby is born. Her reply? No because there's not enough time to do the wedding the way she wants it done  - which is expensive and in a church, with her in a pricey white gown and everything done in pink her favorite color, all of which Harvey will be paying for because of his great job.  Whatever. Not my business, and I don't know Harvey well enough to warn him off. I don't approve but hey, we're not friends and she's not likely to change.   So for months I am listening to the two of them go on and on about the babies they will be birthing, picking up their work and listening to the endless trials of pregnancy. Mary has a hard time, complete with throwing up at her desk. The boss is constantly chitchatting with them over the babies. I don't want kids and have no interest in the whole business but I try to ignore it. Soon, along with all the other problems, the two of them are complaining to the boss that I am not being supportive of them. I point out to the boss that I have a strong moral objection to Karen having a baby with a work superior and not even thinking about getting married but have chosen to keep silent on that rather than air my opinion of unwed mothers whoring around at work. I also point out any number of work issues that have been dumped on me as I am not pregnant, and that Karen and Mary are both often verbally abusive. The subject is dropped.   

Then the baby showers start. First off, the whole group, including the regular workers who are not as good as Karen and Mary, are told that they will all be attending by our boss. The first one is for Karen. Not only is everyone solicited for money for the group gifts, I am told that as part of the project, I should also bring a separate gift. This is also an "at work" shower. The regular team is brought in for a fifteen minute break where they get a piece of cake and the pleasure of watching Karen open gifts that they bought. Did I mention that Karen has loudly and repeatedly spoken on how these people were not on her level? And that Karen was making significantly more money than these people who were required to shell out for gifts for someone they don't like? I am sent back to work after my  gift is opened and the shower, with the boss and Karen and a well-wisher from of different dept goes on for two hours as they chitchat for the rest of the day.   

Forward two months to Mary's shower. Not only is this also a required shower, but now we have added four new people to the project who haven't even met Mary since she was put on bed rest for the duration of the pregnancy. So now everyone has to chip in "as much as you did for Karen, to make it fair", the four new people are also strongly advised to bring additional gifts, and since it is taking place during work hours, only the project people can go.   A week later, I am dropped from the project because of all of the petty complaints made against me (The work was never an issue but the boss felt I didn't relate well to the group). I have yet to receive a thank you note from either woman and I have discovered that no one has received one. And that more people have been deemed unable to relate well to the group. Thank god I don't work there anymore.    

Co-workers0605-05


Page Last Updated May 18, 2007